My Clarity
by ThatDayDreamer-x
Summary: What do you do when everything you knew is torn from you with one simple mistake? How do you fix yourself when you can no longer do the things you once loved because they bring you too much pain? How can do find yourself when everything around you is changing? Can he be the one to bring me backor will he just pull me down even more into this storm? I needed to find it, my clarity.
1. Chapter 1

Hello! This is my new story, give it a go! It's a Paul imprint, in the past I have done a lot of Paul and Embry stories and so obviously I have a new one! I feel this one is going to be more 'intimiate' in terms of not as dramatic as say Just breathe or Nowhere left to run, I usually do stories with lots of leech drama and things so this one I think will have a lot more actual relationship focus and teen problems mixed with typical Paul and pack problems. Rated T but sometimes I do use the 'F' word, I try not to so much on T stories but pre warning it may be used here and there.

So yeah, give it a read and let me know what you think! If it doesn't gain interest or look like people are reading then it won't continue, so if you are interested hit the follow button or if you're a guest leave a review!

_That Day Dreamer x_

* * *

_**I guess it's gonna have to hurt,**_

_**I guess I'm gonna have to cry,**_

_**And let go of some things I've loved,**_

_**To get to the other side**_

_**I guess it's gonna break me down,**_

_**Like falling when you try to fly**_

_**It's sad but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,**_

_**Starts with goodbye**_

Starts with goodbye – Carrie Underwood

* * *

I stared out into the vast nothingness around me, it was pitch black out through the hard window I rested my head against. Nothing out there, not one cloud smothered my view. The soft music drummed in my ears and gave my body what it wanted, a beat to move to but I was confined to a tiny space and so I let my muscles twitch and my feet tap as I remembered the last dance my body had flown through. I hadn't danced since the day the 'incident' happened; I couldn't, not without her there watching me, encouraging me. I had no reason to dance anymore, I did it for her, I loved it too but she was the one who really loved it. My arm was nudged by the little boy curled up in the seat beside me and I shifted in my seat uncomfortably, it was horribly cramped but then it always was on these short haul flights. I hadn't slept a wink, I never could on planes; if I didn't have a comfy bed and a duvet then I didn't sleep. It was as simple as that.

The music went on, drowning out the snores and coughs of the people around me. My chest was heavy with grief as I continued my journey carrying me further and further away from the place I called home, the place that had given me all these amazing memories and opportunities. I was going to make something of myself, I was going to do things with my life and make my mom proud of me. The pain in my chest clenched again and it felt like I was kicked in the gut as I thought of the woman I missed so much. She did everything for me; she never let me down, not until that day. She let me down that day; she broke her promise that day. One mistake, one glance at her phone and she was gone. She left me all alone, the one thing she told me she wouldn't do and she did it. And now three months after I stood on the street corner in the rain for two hours waiting for her, I was leaving and she wasn't there to come with me, or see me off.

So now because of one mistake, one glance at her phone, one truck sliding into the side of her, I was sat alone on a red eye flight to Seattle being sent to live with the only living family I had left. My half brother, siblings thanks to one dead beat father that I had never met. I knew him, my brother Sam Uley, I had always known him. Our mothers thought it would be good for us to build a sibling bond, we had a relationship but I wouldn't say it was a close sibling bond. I spoke to him on average three times a month and we saw each other once a year. But all that was about to change because the family friends I had been staying with no could no longer accommodate the orphaned teenager they promised to look after.

So here I was, Savannah Rae Uley, 17 years old and on her way to live with a brother she barely knew. Chicago was no longer my home, La Push Washington was.

* * *

I heaved my big suitcase through the crowd of people, no one moved out of my way of course because that was too polite and no one here was polite obviously. No instead of moving for the small girl heaving a suitcase nearly half her size and twice her body weight they proceeded to shove me and knock me until I nearly ended up on the floor in a big heap.

My music was still beating away in my ears, Iggy Azealia Bounce was playing and I had it turned up enough that I couldn't hear the obnoxiously loud chatter around me as I dragged myself through to the arrivals lounge of Seattle airport. It was too early to be this busy, it was 4am, nobody should be awake at this hour let alone shoving their way through an airport.

Where was he? I scanned the crowd desperately looking for the gangly 20 year old I had seen last year, he had skipped our annual visit this year due to 'responsibilities' unknown to him that three months later he would have a new responsibility shoved on him in the form of a 17 year old with serious emotional issues. The last time I saw him he had longish hair, fairly slim and was maybe just under 6 ft, but I saw no one here of that description. Maybe he was late, or forgot. He probably forgot, I sulked toward the seating area preparing myself to wait however long it took for him to realise I was here but as I went a hand came down on my shoulder pulling me back.

"What the" I started but stopped as I turned around to be faced with a mammoth of a man, easily well over 6ft2 with the body structure that could only be described as a tree trunk. He was massive. But he was Sam. His body had changed but his face hadn't, he was every inch my brother as the gangly 20 year old was I saw last year. His mouth moved but I heard nothing, just the Pretty Reckless song that was playing in my ear. I tore the earpieces from my ears and smiled at him as much as I could. "Sam?"

"I've been trying to get your attention for ages, I was over there" His voice was low, manly, gruff, scary if it were a dark alley. "How are you? You look shattered" He offered me a small smile now and came in for a brief slightly awkward hug that I returned as best I could given the 5 bags hanging from me.

"I'm ok; I am shattered though I can never sleep on planes. You've changed a lot, you're huge" I couldn't stop myself, he was abnormally big. He laughed a little and nodded this awkward posture relaxing as he took various bags from their hanging places on my body.

"You haven't you're still tiny. Come on, my friend is waiting over here, pass me your suitcase" He held his hand out taking the heavy luggage from me, I rolled my eyes at the tiny comment, he was commenting on my height. He had always taken pleasure in how short I was. At 5'4 he towered over me, always had. I liked most things about myself except my height. One thing I was damn proud of was that I wasn't like the other stick thin dancers at my dance school, or the size zero girls at my normal school. I may be active and I may have used to do dance four times a week but I had an extra layer on me that the others didn't. I loved that my hips were straight, they had a curve to them, I loved that my ass was slightly out of proportion to my small body and I liked that I had a rack on me that my dance teacher had to stick into my tops at competitions. I would never be a stick thin girl, I was strong to an extent and I was toned in a way, but still. I ate what I wanted and I didn't bother looking at the calorie count. After all, what's the point in going through life unhappy and restricting yourself on what you can eat?

Sam began pulling the suitcase with such ease you would think it was as light as a feather, I thought as a dancer I had some strength but obviously not as much as I thought. I followed him through the crowd until we reached the edge of the airport lounge beside where the door led, I could feel the fresh air hitting me and I craved for it. I had been in airports, bus stations and taxi's for well over 15 hours now. I needed air. "Savannah, this is my friend Jared, this is my sister Savannah" Sam broke through the little love affair I was having with the fresh air and I looked up to smile at the guy, I couldn't though. He was just as big, just as tall and fairly handsome; he took me a little by surprise. The sheer size of him was enough to halt me, then to chuck in his good looks just threw me even more.

"Hey, it's nice to meet you. Sam's told us a lot about you" He smiled and offered his hand to me which I took slowly, but quickly dropped. He was scorching hot to touch yet he looked perfectly healthy. I gave him a short smile and a quick nod before realising what he said.

"Us?"

He smiled again and nodded as he took the piles of bags from my shoulder. "Yeah, all the guys, they are dying to meet you" And as if it were the most normal thing to throw the words 'all the guys' at a 17 year old girl he walked out through the doors and into the early morning. Guys, as in plural. I wasn't good around groups of people let alone groups of just guys. Sam hung back to walk beside me and smiled down at me, it was a sad smile.

"I know this isn't what you wanted, to come and live with me and everything that happened but I'll try do what I can to make it like home for you. And don't look so worried, the guys are fine they don't bite" He snorted a little at the end as if he found what he said highly amusing.

"I know you will Sam, I know and I appreciate you having me" I ignored the guys comment; I didn't want to focus on that. Right now I needed to build this sibling bond my mother always went on about.

"Wouldn't have it any other way, now let's get you home so you can sleep and eat"

Home, home was thousands of miles from here in a little house in the suburbs of Chicago. To go home was to turn around and make the long trip I had just made, but I guess I needed to try and give La Push a chance because Chicago was a distant memory now, a place that only existed in my dreams. I had to move on, to say goodbye to that place and that dream. La Push, it had a pretty name. Maybe this would be better than Chicago, maybe.


	2. Chapter 2

_**So when I'm ready to be bolder,**_

_**And my cuts have healed with time,**_

_**Comfort with rest on my shoulder**_

_**And I'll bury my future behind,**_

_**I'll always keep you with me**_

_**You'll always be on my mind**_

_**But there's a shining in the shadows**_

_**I'll never know unless I try**_

Home – Gabrielle Aplin

I do not own Twilight

I was being shaken softly; my eyes didn't want to open but the shaking continued along with the cooing of my name. The drive was long, I fell asleep just as we left Seattle but Sam said it was a good few hours.

"Savannah we are here" The voice cooed again and again my body was shaken. I gave in eventually and opened my eyes, the light around me was dull but it was day time. Sam was stood at the door beside where I sat in his old truck and he smiled at me. "Sorry, I didn't think you would appreciate being carried in" He shrugged a little and I nodded back, I probably would have crapped myself waking up in a place I didn't know. "Jared and Paul got your bags, come on Emily is dying to meet you" He smiled wider this time, his eyes lighting up more as he spoke her name. I had heard about her but never seen or met her. I think they started dating last year and got engaged pretty swiftly after that, he said she was amazing and by the look on his face I could tell she meant a lot to him.

I shook my body more awake and grabbed my shoulder bag that was lazily strewn over the seat next to me and climbed out, it was freezing. I was in skinny jeans and a hoody but I was still freezing. Overlooking the small yard I saw that we were in the middle of what seemed like a forest, trees were surrounding us on every side and stuck right in the middle of those trees was a house, a wooden like house that looked as if it had grown directly from the trees that billowed over it. It was small and cute, something of a cottage you would imagine reading about in a mystical book. Little red riding hood sprung to mind, the grandma's house.

"It's not much, but there's a spare room and enough space for the three of us" Sam quickly added as if noticing me staring at the little house, he sounded somewhat self conscious of the place but I didn't know why. It was pretty and unique.

"It's cute, different" I smiled back at him and he nodded with a little smile on his much older face, I had studied him before I fell asleep. He had changed so much, he looked easily 26 not 21, his hair wasn't long anymore but cropped into a lazy surfer style haircut that lay at the top of his neck and in general he was just different. The only thing that stayed the same was the big brown eyes and fairly serious posture. He had always been a serious person but now he seemed more so, as if he was a man with responsibilities and control over his life, very unlike the 21 year olds I met back home who were all party hard or go home sort of people. He jerked his head toward the house telling me to follow him and I did, I smelt it as soon as I hit the bottom step of the wooden porch, fresh baking. Homely, very homely. Almost too good to be true homely.

I glanced to the left of me as I reached the front door and saw that my assumption about the house growing from the trees seemed even more fitting, a huge tree ran straight through the porch. This was definitively the strangest little house I had ever seen, carved on the tree trunk I could see words, drawings but I couldn't make out what they were without getting closer.

"Savannah" Sam called from ahead of me; he was stood in the doorway waiting for me to follow him in. The nerves in my stomach kicked up again and I suddenly felt on show and awkward, I wasn't into meeting new people and the idea of meeting a bunch of guys had freaked me out from the minute the Jared guy had said it. I kept my head down just staring at the floor beneath my feet, the old woven rug that was frayed from years of people walking over it. The house was warm, the smell even more overpowering than it had been outside, it smelt like cake batter baking and a subtle hint of honey. "Savannah this is Emily, my fiancée" His voice made me jerk my head up again, I was awkward in new situations but I wasn't rude. I glanced up at the empty kitchen, empty apart from Sam and the girl who lay cuddled in his arms. She was probably the same height as me but she looked tiny next to him, her head was turned showing me only her long ebony black hair that was straight and fell to her shoulders, she was slim built and in simple jeans and a checked fitted shirt. Then her head twisted and surprise took me for a second but I steadied myself and smiled back at her as genuinely as I could. She was undeniably pretty, kind faced and truthful in her smile but she had three long scars running down her face and touching the upper part of her neck. Sam was studying me as if waiting for me to say something rude or hurtful, his smile had gone and he was watching me with intense interest. But I didn't focus on her scars; I lifted my eyes to hers and smiled more.

"It's so good to meet you. Sam has told me so much about you and I've been so excited to have a girl here with me at last" She loosened herself from her hold and walked across to me, she seemed genuinely nice. It didn't sound like something Sam had grilled her to say, she stood in front of me for a second before wrapping her arms around my shoulder for a hug that I semi returned, it took me a little by surprise. She was near enough the same height and build as me but she hugged me a bit of force and I couldn't quite steady myself enough to fully hug her back. She let go and smiled at me again waiting for me to speak.

"I uhh, yeah Sam's told me all about you too" He hadn't, he had only told me basic information but I didn't want to be rude. "Thank you for having me" I gave her a smile then looked at Sam, he was smiling again now and looked somewhat relieved I hadn't said anything rude or been rude, not that I would have. I wasn't a rude person, I had never back chatted anyone in my entire life, or gotten in a fight or anything like that. I was mostly a calm person.

"Oh it's no problem, you are family. We are so happy to have you here"

My stomach clenched painfully as she said the words 'you are family'. I was half family and only hear because if Sam didn't take me I would be put into the care system, my family was my mom and she was gone. I was sure Sam had taken me out of pity than anything else, that and the fact my mom had put him in her will as carer for me if something happened to her. I guess she did the will a few years back after she had a cancer scare, although at the time Sam was a teen so I didn't know why she would think it ok to put him in as my guardian. But now I was glad she had because I had spent three weeks in a foster home while they waited to sort out me coming here and it wasn't exactly the best experience I had ever had. I looked back up at my brother, his face saddened since I last looked at him and I realised tears had sprung to my eyes. I didn't cry often but lately I was like a tap that was unable to shut itself off. I gave him a swift smile that he didn't return and blinked the tears away.

"So this is the house, it's nothing special but it suits for now. The guys are just putting your bags in your room and fixing the dressing table for you, Quil broke it during a game of hide and seek with Claire the other day. I will show you up in a minute, but would you like breakfast? I bet you haven't eaten in so long" Emily started motioning to the big open rooms around us, when I say big I mean because it was just one huge open plan downstairs with archways separating the rooms. The kitchen was directly as you walked in, with the dining area joined to it then through the dining area and archway was a living area with two sofas and a flurry of random chairs scattered around the TV. The wooden stairs led straight into the kitchen/diner and I could hear the banging of feet and furniture upstairs as Jared and whoever Paul was fixed whatever someone called Quil had broken. "Made muffins, but I have some cereals here too or I could do you pancakes, bacon. Anything you want really, we stock in piles of food for the guys so you can look in the pantry if you like" Emily rambled on a little as she fluttered by the kitchen island where a big plate full of muffins rested. Stocked food in for the guys? What were they all, body builders?

I shook my head at her and smiled. "Just cereal is fine thank you" I was watchful of what I ate, not because I was a weight freak but because I had to be healthy for dance. Not that I danced anymore, I guess it was habit.

"Savannah doesn't eat meat" Sam chirped up now as he pulled out two chairs at the kitchen table and motioned for me to sit next to him. It took me a little by surprise that he knew that and I cocked my head at him. "What? I pay attention on the two day visits you know" He smiled a little again and handed me a glass of orange juice before sitting back in his chair.

"Oh, well I am sure we can find some food here for you. The boys will be happy though, they hate sharing food especially the bacon, and if it means more for them then you're already a winner in their eyes" Emily started giggling as she poured milk into a bowl. "We only have granola, is that ok?" She placed the bowl in front of me and I nodded, it wasn't fruit loops but it would do. She wasn't a pushy dance mom but she wanted the best for me and apparently this was the best. "It's only Kim who eats cereal here and she eats granola so that's all we have"

"It's fine, thank you"

"So you can be enrolled in La Push high school after the Christmas break, so you have a month off before having to go. I figured you would be happy about that" Sam stirred up conversation with the normal smile on his face, he seemed like he was on edge, nervous and jittery as if he was desperate to make conversation to keep the atmosphere friendly. Not that it wouldn't be, I got on well with Sam, he was my brother and my family I guess, and Emily seemed nice. But it did feel slightly awkward I guess, suddenly having to live with people I didn't know and a brother I didn't know that well. My stomach dropped at the mention of school, I didn't want to go back to school, I couldn't handle it. I hadn't been at school in two months, I lasted a day before I stopped going again. They let me have two weeks off after my mom died, I had been staying at her friend's house and they said I should go back to get back to normality, but I couldn't handle the sad looks, the pity and the questions, the questions were the worst. They weren't mean, but even a simple 'how are you' made my heart tear open. So I refused to go again, and after another week my mom's friend couldn't handle me being there all the time and so the care system took over until the paperwork was signed for Sam to take me. I guess I hadn't given school much thought, I was in my senior year so it was vital I went back but still.

"It's a nice school, small. I mean there's probably only 40 kids in the senior year if that" Sam went on and I nodded along, at least here they wouldn't know I guess, they wouldn't have a reason other than I was the much paler new girl. They wouldn't pity me for what happened to my mom, they would just wonder why I was there and why I wasn't fully Native American, and that was an answer I could give them without crying. I was only half Native American, mom was white and Josh was Quileute. And together they made me; I was tanned but not as russet skinned as Sam or Jared, or even Emily. I was more olive toned, like I had been at the beach all day. My hair wasn't black, it was brown but then Sam didn't have jet black hair so I guess not all Quileute's did. I was just being stereotypical. "And you won't be alone; you're in the same class as Jacob, Quil and Embry"

"And Kim" Emily piped in. I didn't ask who they were, I guess they were part of the 'guys' Jared had mentioned.

"And then Seth is at the school as well, he's a junior, Collin and Brady are only sophomores but they probably won't bother you much" Again I had no idea who Sam was talking about I nodded anyway, I would probably be introduced to them at some point. Although, they were mostly male so I wasn't sure I was quite comfortable with that. I wasn't a prune, I had male friends back home but if the guys here were anything like my brother now was or Jared was, then they were probably going to intimidate the hell out of me. Maybe I could make friends with Kim; she likes cereal, that's one thing in common. We could bond over cereal.

"You're overwhelming her Sam" Emily had sat down beside her fiancé and landed a playful slap on his arm before looking at me. "You will meet them later on, they are all really nice and I'm sure they will make you feel welcomed" Something in the way she said it made me think that they would make me feel welcomed or face her wrath, she seemed like the kind of person to be able to control a bunch of guys like that. She was sweet, but she had a look about her, I wouldn't cross her.

"I think the guys are done with the dressing table, either that or they've gone suspiciously quite because they've broken something else" Sam shifted in his seat and I found myself cocking my head to look at the stairs. I couldn't hear anything, just their footsteps. I would hardly say they had been loud before hand but maybe Sam was more in tune with his house than I was and could hear freakishly well. "I'll show you up if you're finished"

I nodded again and stood up with the half empty bowl; Emily shook her head though and took it back off me allowing Sam to show me up the stairs. A man was walking from a doorway as I reached the top, his back was too me but he was shirtless and huge, muscles twitched in his shoulder blades and his russet skin seemed to almost stretch over them. He was as big as Jared, but he wasn't Jared. This guy was taller than Jared I was sure of it.

"Paul, this is Savannah" Sam called out to him but he didn't look around, he just walked down the hallway and reached for another door.

"Yeah yeah let me piss first" The guy called out and Sam shook his head in slight annoyance.

"That's Paul, full of manners as you can see"

"Great to meet you Savannah" Paul carried on into the room giving me a wave with his hand but again, he didn't look at me. I couldn't see his face but something swirled in my stomach, as if I were swooning over him already. Muscled men around a teenage girl, obviously I was going to crush on one of them at some point.

"Come on, just ignore him" Sam sounded a little exasperated as he headed into the room Paul had just left, it was a small room but it was nicely decorated. It smelled slightly of fresh paint and it looked fresh too. The walls were a magnolia colour, a double bed fit in the centre with two side tables on each side, two lamps rested there and the bed had a small teddy on it. The newly fixed dressing table was beside the wardrobe opposite the bed, although it looked slightly wonky. The window was open, blowing the red and brown swirled curtains in and out. It was nicely decorated, brown and red themed I realised. Above the bed lay three canvas pictures, one had a picture of a beach on it, then a cliff top and the last was a hand painting of a wolf. It was a pretty room, fit well with the house in general.

"We didn't know if you were into girly colours, Emily wanted to paint it pink but somehow I couldn't picture you as a pink girl so Kim said red and brown, is it ok?" Sam turned to me as he stopped beside Jared who was now also topless and very muscled. I nodded as I continued looking around, there was a picture frame on the right bedside table, I had to squint to see it but it was a picture of me and Sam, we had it taken on one of the annual visits, we had been at the Zoo.

"It's really nice Sam, you didn't have to redecorate for me though" It felt nice that he had, made me feel just that more welcomed and almost wanted here rather than being a pain in his ass.

"Well, unless you wanted to sleep on the floor amongst boxes piled high with unpacked ornaments your grandmother would own, then you should be glad we did redecorate. The room was a dingy orange and smelled like Quil's feet" Jared added in now and I had to chuckle a little bit. I guess it was a good thing they painted it then.

"Well thank you, it's nice and I am definitely not a pink girl so this is perfect"

"Paul get in here and say hi" Sam suddenly called out as a body went sulking past the open bedroom door, it stopped but didn't turn to look in.

"I'm late for work dude, it's not like she's going anywhere I can say hi later" He sounded pissed off, maybe he didn't like me. My heart drooped at the idea of him not liking me which seemed crazy because I didn't even know the guy. Sam tutted while Jared laughed a little and the footsteps in the hallway started again as Paul went off down the stairs.

"Such an asshole, don't worry Paul's like a guy with constant PMS he hates everyone" Jared reached out and nudged my arm playfully before walking around me and out down the stairs.

"The others won't be as rude I promise, they are all at school right now but we organise a bonfire tonight so you could meet them. Hope you don't mind, I know you only just got here but they spend a lot of time at the house so we didn't want you to be overwhelmed with them all one day when you woke up. Seemed like a good idea when we organised it, we can cancel it if you want, introduce them slowly" Sam was rambling, I had never seen him ramble but he was rambling. He was obviously nervous about either me being here, or me meeting his friends. Although why he was friends with kids in high school I had no idea.

"Sam it's fine, tonight's fine. I just need a shower first, and a nap" I probably stank, airplane smell and I was still shattered. He nodded his sudden nerves calming. As much as meeting these new people would freak me out, I needed to at least try. This was my home now, I needed to try and fit in, make it something other than the nightmare I had been dreading recently.

"The shower is down there, there are only three rooms up here so you can't really get lost. I have work in a bit but Emily will be here, she can help you unpack and if you want you can help her with the food for tonight. I'm sure she will love getting to know you a bit more, it's like she's deprived of female attention" He grinned like a Cheshire cat again, I didn't find that hard to believe if all these guys were around so much. "Anyway, I'll see you in a while" He leant in for another brief and slightly awkward hug before wondering out of the room.

I glanced around, it was nice here, and the people were nice. Well the three people I had met so far were nice, Paul was different but he wasn't as bad as he could have been. I've met ruder people. I think I could like it here, if I tried and let myself get close to these people, but first I need a shower and a power nap.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Something's scratching its way out  
Something you wanna forget about**_

_**A part of you that'll never show  
You're the only one  
That'll ever know**_

_**Take it back when it all began  
Take your time, would you understand  
What it's all about, what it's all about?**_

Little house- The Fray

I hadn't been able to sleep, so instead Emily came up and unpacked my things with me. I had quickly come to realise she was a very talkative person, she chatted away about people I didn't know, things I had never heard of and places I suppose I would get to go to now that I lived here. She had smiled kindly at the picture I had of me and my mom, she didn't ask questions though or mention it, which is what I like. I didn't like the 'I'm sorry for you loss' comments because they made it all fresh again, the pain would spring up again if someone made me remember that she was gone.

Emily did comment about the picture she found of me in my dance gear, it was at a competition last year. Me and my dance partner Kyle had got second place, the picture was always on show alongside the other pictures of me dancing my mom had in our old house. This was the only one I brought with me though, the others were a little too shrine like for my liking. Emily had cooed over it, saying how cute I looked in my leotard. I danced a mixture of things, my main focus was contemporary, but I did normal ballet, some tap when I was younger and a bit of hip hop here and there but contemporary was my favourite, always had been. I liked the feeling I got when Kyle and I would do the lifts, made me feel like I could fly.

It was coming up to 5pm, Sam hadn't returned and none of these ever present guys had turned up. I was helping Emily make cookies; she had easily made 50 now but insisted we needed more. Then there were chocolate muffins, 30 of them filled the plate. She made a good 70 sandwiches, and had 20 big sharing bags of chips with 6 dips. I had an image in my head of sitting around a campfire 11 obese teenagers with guys hanging over their trousers and five chins hanging around their neck. Emily kept insisting that they would probably still need more, but after going through the 9th loaf of bread and mumbled something about them making their own god damned food in the future.

"If you hadn't already been a winner by not being a threat to the guy's meat, then they will definitely love you for your cookies. They are really good Savannah" She praised me as she bit into one of the white chocolate and oatmeal cookies I had made.

"My mom's recipe, she makes the best" I stopped myself and the lump grew in my throat again. I wouldn't cry, I wouldn't talk about her. "She made the best cookies, she was a great cook" I dropped my eyes from Emily, she was giving a sad smile and she made her way around the counter to where I stood. I didn't want this conversation.

"She also sounds like she was a great mom" Her hand came up on my shoulder and I nodded, she was the best. "It will be ok Savannah, it gets easier I promise" Something in her voice made me feel like she knew first hand, that her words weren't the generic ones everyone else spoke to me but that she actually knew it would. I didn't want to ask, I don't think I could anyway because the lump in my throat was so prominent and painful that I would have choked had I tried to speak. Instead I smiled at her and went on to putting the last few cookies in the tub ready to take to wherever we were having the bonfire.

"I'm going to start loading the truck up, Sam will be home soon to take us down. You might want to get a jacket on, it gets cold down on the beach at night" Emily walked away from me, her happy tone back in her voice. The beach? My stomach suddenly jumped in excitement I had only been to a beach once before and that was when I was 8 and on vacation with my grandparents.

I nodded again and closed the cookie tub before running upstairs to the guest room. My room, I corrected, it was my room now. Just like this was my home now. The stab of pain hit my chest again and I paused as I reached the wardrobe, every inch of my body was desperate for it to all go away, I was forever yearning for time to reverse itself and for me to tell my mom not rush to my performance, to tell her that missing one measly school performance wouldn't kill her. But it had killed her, she was late and she was rushing and because of that, she died. And no matter how much I hoped, wished and prayed that time would relapse and I would have one more day with her. It didn't, this was home now. The Chicago house was gone; the money split into my trust fund and some to Sam to cover costs of him taking care of me. Not that the house cost that much, it was tiny but I suppose it would help when it came to me needing it.

I reached in the cupboard fishing for my coat; I was wearing simple clothes having gone for comfort over style. I had a pair of dark blue skinny jeans on with long sleeve tight fitted cotton top. I chucked a zipped hoody on then my black leather jacket on, it was a cropped on reaching the middle of my back and had patters stitched into the sleeves. My old converse would do for tonight, so I chucked them on and walked back down the stairs to where Sam was now stood holding the tray of 70 odd sandwiches.

"Grab the muffins for me Sav" He called out as he walked through the door, he always called me Sav, the only person who ever did actually. Everyone else shortened it to Anna, he always said Sav. I grabbed the box of muffins and followed him out, everything else was already loaded up so I jumped in the back seat.

"You look pretty" Emily turned and smiled at me, my face blushed at her comment. I didn't take well to compliments, I always blushed. "I can't wait for you to meet Kim, she's the same age as you and she is really sweet. She's Jared's girlfriend" Emily started chatting as Sam got in and pulled out of the yard. It took me a minute to realise what she said, the same age as me and Jared was her boyfriend? Jared looks easily 23/24. "And I think Jacob is bringing Nessie with him, she's like 8 now but she's old for her age"

"She's Jared's girlfriend?" I asked ignoring the Nessie person comment, Sam nodded as did Emily, I thought for a minute maybe I misjudged Jared's age and that he was in high school too but then I remembered he was at work today. "How old is Jared? He looks easily early twenties"

Sam stiffened slightly but shook his head; Emily on the other hand laughed a forced laugh and turned around to look at me. "Oh no, Jared's only 19, he is a year older than Kim. He just looks older because of how big he is, then again they all do" What? He was 19? That was impossible, but then I guess Sam looked mid twenties and he was only 21 so maybe the guys around here aged quicker. Must be the sea air or something. She turned back around and returned to chatting away about whoever it was I was meeting tonight. Their names went in and out, the images of big fat guys going with each one.

I looked out of the window, occasionally nodded and making slight noises when she stopped talking but I was focusing on the trees that whizzed past me, this place was full of trees. It didn't take long until we pulled into a small parking area, there were a few other trucks here and a small red car that looked like it belonged in a scrap yard. The lighting was darkening now as the evening drew on but I could see a fire in the distance illuminating an area of the long beach. It was a very pretty place, La Push, the pretty name definitely fit the actual place.

Sam did a sort of wolf whistle as we climbed out of the car and within a minute three guys were running up the beach toward the car. I recognised one to be Jared but I didn't know the other two. Emily just handed me the muffins again and began walking, nodding for me to join her. The guys ran past not stopping to look at me or greet me in any way and Emily just laughed.

"Don't take it personally; they can just smell the food. The slimmer one is Embry and the tubbier one Quil" She commented and I looked back, they weren't fat, not by any means. My imagery had been off, the Embry one was the opposite, he was slim and defined, not overly muscled like Jared but he had muscles, he was just more toned. Quil was bigger but his muscles weren't as defined, he seemed a little, as Emily put it, tubbier. "I've got to say, you seem very calm for someone about to meet a group of greedy boys, I would be scared silly" She went on chatting as we hit the sand, I had come to realise Emily was a very talkative person. She reminded me of my mom, she was motherly, cooked amazing food and could chat for America.

"I guess I am, scared I mean. Me and groups of people don't mix" It was true; groups of people freaked me out and completely overwhelmed me to the point that I blushed beetroot red when around big groups.

"But surely you have to be in groups for your dancing, like dance teams" She was watching me as we walked down the cold breezy beach. I shook my head and smiled, a lot of people thought that.

"No, I danced contemporary which you can do in groups but I mainly danced solo or with my partner. I was part of a dance group, not a team as such but my dance school. We would do some group numbers but mostly they focused on us as individuals and the partner work. Besides, that was different; I grew up in that dance school and with a lot of the girls there. I've never met these guys before"

"Well, they probably aren't that much different to the girls" I laughed at her comment; she was fairly witty at times. "You think I'm joking, talk about bitchyness and cat fights. I can guarantee you won't leave tonight without seeing one fight break out and one guy go running off to his mom or something along those lines" I smiled at that, now I imagined great big fat guys squabbling over food. They couldn't be that bad I guess, Emily seemed fond of them even when she spoke about how greedy they were.

"And I can bet you that the one running off crying to his mommy will be Embry" Sam's low voice quipped from behind me and I turned to see him striding beside me a big grin on his face.

"I can bet you it won't, I don't go crying to anyone. Don't listen to him Savannah, I'm the tough one" The slimmer guy called out from beside the tubbier Quil and I chuckled a little. "I'm Embry by the way" He called out again and he tried waving at me but dropped a bag of chips in the process causing Quil to stop and attempt to help, only to drop a crate of soda cans.

"Just leave them, it will take them all night to figure out how to pick it up again" Sam laughed as he spoke, I had started walking back to where they were thinking I should help but Sam obviously knew these two better than me so I followed him again and pushed on down the sand. Emily had walked ahead and was setting her trays down on a blanket beside the fire. I could make out silhouettes of people but it was too dark to see properly.

We reached the blanket Emily was at and I dropped the box I was carrying, Sam dropped his stuff too and reached out for my hand before I could kneel down to help Emily sort it all out. "I'll introduce you to everyone before they get too focused on the food they forget your here"

I took his hand, his scorching hot hand. It took a lot for me not to pull out of his grip, it was burning my palm. His skin as hot as Jared's had been, they had to be ill. He didn't seem to realise though and before I could mention it he was pulling me around the fire to where the silhouettes were all stood chatting amongst themselves.

"Hey guys" Sam called out and the group all stopped and turned, my face went hot and I knew I was blushing. For a dancer who performed on stage at competitions, I got awfully embarrassed by attention. "This is Savannah" He was smiling as he spoke and he pushed me more toward them but my heels dug into the sand, maybe I wasn't ready for this. We could do it in little groups, but no he just dragged me closer until I could make out their bodies and faces. My assumptions were off, way off. Not one of them was fat, not one single guy here has a stomach hanging over his trousers. Quite the opposite, they were all beasts. Big, tall, toned, muscled beasts.

"Sav, this is Jacob" Sam started and pointed toward a guy equally as big as Sam if not slightly wider in build. Jacob, as in the one in the same class as me? He couldn't be 18, he was an animal. The guy smiled down at me and extended his hand, Sam dropped mine and I offered it to Jacob. His hand was hot, just as hot as Sam's. They were all sick, that temperature was not normal.

"Nice to finally meet you, Sam's told us all about his little sister" Jacob seemed nice, but then again I rarely thought badly of someone and we had just met, but still he seemed friendly. "This is Nessie" He stopped and turned around but there was no one there. "Damn it, she keeps running off. Nessie" He called out and I caught a glimpse of a little girl running her way around the fire toward Emily, Jacob saw it too and he rolled his eyes a little. "Nessie, not again" He groaned and began running after her, her giggle began then and I realised it was obviously a game the little girl played with him.

"That's Seth" Sam went on and pointed at a younger boy who gave me a big cheesy grin before making a beeline for the food blanket. He too was anything but fat, he was tall and slender, gangly I suppose. He was young, I could tell he was younger than the others but his height and his awkward body build was older. "He's a good kid, you'll see him at school when you start I suppose" I nodded as Sam pulled me along more. Jared was back now and sat with a girl, she was perched on his lap and was twiddling with her fingers, picking old nail varnish off as Jared talked away with a guy who's back was turned. "You already know Jared, that's Kim his girlfriend but I am sure Emily will have you as best friends by the end of the night" Sam gave a quick chuckle at that, but I knew he was being serious. Emily had been going on all day about how amazing Kim was and how excited she was for us to meet. The girl glanced up giving me a kind smile as she clocked me looking at her. She was pretty, in a natural way. She didn't wear makeup and her hair wasn't pristine and in place like the girls back home was. She was plain I suppose, but she was pretty.

A slight whistle brought my attention back to Sam and I saw him click at two boys, very young boys who were play fighting and rolling around in the sand. They were young, very young. They were tall, maybe only 5'6 but their faces easily looked early teens. "And these two pups are Collin and Brady" Sam pointed to each one, Collin was the smaller one, his hair messy and long, his clothes covered in sand whereas Brady was a bit bigger with neatly cropped hair and clothes that were new looking, everything about him screamed mommies boy. They were adorable though, as adorable as two 13 years olds taller than you could be. "Guys this is Savannah, my sister" Sam had been throwing that word out a lot today, sister and brother. Felt nice I suppose, just strange. He had never really referred me as it before.

Before I could say hi the two boys had stepped forward and were proceeding to stare at me with such strain that Collin was turning red. I glanced between the two off them, their eyes scanned in directly on mine and their foreheads creased in hard concentration.

"You feel anything?" Brady mumbled and Collin shook his head. "Paul said it would work" He mumbled again never dropping his eye contact with me.

"Would you two stop it" Sam slapped his hand out hitting Collin on his little shoulder and sending both boys knocking to the floor. "Why can't you be normal for one day guys?" He hissed at them as they started watching me again. "Stop it" He ordered this time, a ring of authority in his voice that I hadn't heard before. But it worked; the two boys quickly snapped their heads down. "Sorry, they umm act weird around girls. Probably have a crush on you or something"

"Last time I listen to Paul" Brady groaned as he pulled himself back up to his feet and sulked off toward Emily who I could see was holding in a laugh as she watched whatever had just happened.

"Paul" Sam shouted and turned toward where Jared was, the guy with his back to us glanced over his shoulder, his mouth turned up in an evilly amused grin. "Savannah that's Paul, the one too rude to introduce himself properly" Sam was annoyed, I could hear it as clear as day in his voice.

His grin widened as he turned to look at my brother, again paying no attention to me. The sight of his face halted me, he was beautiful. I had never described a man as beautiful but he was every sense of the word and more. His hair was cropped but messy, his face had slight stubble around his jaw and chin as if he hadn't shaved today, but it was his eyes that were really breath taking. They weren't just brown, it was getting dark out but the fire illuminated his face and I could see his defined lips, perfectly shaped nose and his eyes. They had a silver streak to them that fired away and danced as the orange light hit them. He was perfectly handsome.

"Fine" He shot himself upwards, his easily well over 6ft tall frame towering over me as he made his way over. He was built like a tree, just as big as Sam but his arms were thicker with muscles, his white top seemed to stretch over him highlighting that he had muscles. "Pleasure to meet you" He stopped as he looked down at me and seeing me staring right back at him.

By this point Sam had given a sort of huff and walked away to where I could hear Emily telling Brady that I was way out of his league anyway and that he should know not to believe the things Paul tells him. But now I heard nothing, I just stared up with a hot blush crawling up my neck as the guy in front of me stared right back, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly gaping as he watched me. Then as quickly as the surprised look on his face came it left, his eyes scanned over me as if sizing me up.

"Savannah" It was more of an angry statement of my name rather than a nicety to introduce himself. His fists clenched and he backed away still staring nastily at me as if I was the most repulsive thing he had ever seen. He turned and stormed back to where Jared was sat now watching the two of us with interest, Kim had been looking too and quickly bounced herself up from her boyfriends lap as Paul dropped himself back down with a scowl on his face. I wasn't quite sure what to do, I hadn't done anything to make him angry but he looked thoroughly pissed off. Kim came bouncing toward me, she seemed slightly nervous and kept looking back to Jared who was whispering something to Paul who was still staring at me with great dislike.

"Uhh Savannah right?" Kim stopped in front of me blocking my view of the angry guy behind her, I nodded and she smiled. "I'm Kim, umm don't worry about him he just gets angry a lot" She added as I found myself peering around her to look at the gorgeous man who was causing a dropping sensation inside of me. "Umm let's go help Emily, she looks like she needs it" Kim was nervous as she spoke, quiet as if shy and somewhat uncomfortable. I didn't want to help Emily, I wanted Paul to stop looking at me like he was, I wanted him to like me, I was desperate for him to stop looking at me like I was a piece of shit on his shoe. I turned anyway; Kim was quiet next to me as we walked to Emily who was currently trying to wrestle Collin and Seth away from the sandwiches. Sam was stood with Jacob who seemed to be pinning the little girl down with his foot while she tried crawling away from him. I wanted to ask Sam to make Paul stop staring at me but he seemed to have not noticed what had happened and I didn't want to sound pathetic so I left it and settled beside Emily and Kim on the sand next to the food, Emily was mumbling about how childish Seth was being while Kim was staring past me to where Jared was. I turned to look only to find him not there, neither was Paul. They were walking off toward the water, Paul was marching his fists still clenched. He hated me.

The idea of him hating me caused a stir of pain in my chest, then I realised the guy didn't know me enough to hate me. He was just being cruel and pathetic. I quickly came to the conclusion that Paul was an asshole.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Drop his name,**_

_**Push it in and twist the knife**_

_**Watch my face**_

_**As I pretend to feel no pain**_

Heartbreak warfare- John Mayer

Emily had been right about the food, they guys had demolished every last bit. Sam had to literally wrestle a bag of chips away from Embry so that I could actually eat something. Emily had forgotten to make a non meat sandwich was I was restricted to chips and dip and baked goods, except the baked goods had been eaten when I reached to get one. So chips it was.

"What do you mean you don't eat meat?" Quil asked suddenly as I nibbled on a salted chip stick. I realised all of the guys were watching me now and the blush I had managed to keep at bay all night came rushing back up. my eyes flickered around each one, each confused face until I reached his, his face was mean and full of hate, eye contact with him scorched me and stabbed at me. I felt stupid, I knew I shouldn't care that he obviously didn't like me but I did care.

"She's one of them vegetable people" Seth quickly spoke up, his nose scrunching in dislike as if the thought of someone eating vegetables was gross.

"You mean vegetarian?" Kim was looking at Seth with an amused look on her face, the guys were all really confused at the fact I wasn't devouring the ham and chicken sandwiches.

"Why would you do that?" Embry asked now and I noticed him holding his sandwich close to his chest, like he was afraid I would take it off him. I had only been around them an hour but I had quickly seen what Emily meant; they were all like over grown children. They were funny though, and friendly. Well, all except Paul who had spent the hour under Jared's watchful eye, the whole hour was spent glaring at me while Jared gave me apologetic smiles and mumbled 'sorry' to me as I walked past him. I didn't get why he was apologising, it wasn't his fault his friend was a massive ass.

"Stop questioning her" Sam growled slightly but it didn't help, everyone was still staring at me like I was an alien.

"I just never really liked meat I guess" I shrugged it off but my comment earned a round of exasperated gasps from Embry, Seth, Collin and Brady who looked at me like I had just gone on a foul mouthed rant. Jacob was laughing as he watched them, I had to say, if I weren't feeling so on the spot I would find their reactions funny. "I used to eat it as a kid but it made me gag all the time. I guess I never liked the texture of it so my mom stopped giving it to me and I haven't tried eating it since" I shrugged again and again all the guys eyes bugged out crazily.

"That's so weird, you're like Kim. She eats all this crazy shit like fruit, and carrots and that cardboard stuff for her breakfast" Quil shuddered a little as he said it and I glanced at Kim who rolled her eyes. I guess they didn't like healthy food.

"Ignore them Savannah, they don't eat anything that doesn't come from a packet or contain high levels of E numbers. I can't even get them to eat raisin cookies, apparently it gives them trust issues and they can't trust chocolate chip cookies now" Emily starts laughing from beside me as Sam hissed at the guys to stop staring at me. Most of them did, he had to hit Embry over the head to make him stop but soon enough everyone was back to munching on their food. All except Paul who hadn't had one bite, he was just watching me. He was beginning to make me feel uneasy and I prayed that Sam took notice but he hadn't, he was oblivious to his friend who was giving me death glares. Jared was trying though, but his attempts failed and in the end Kim had moved to sit next to me and was attempting to distract me from the stares.

"So Sam said you're from Chicago" The Jake guy asked offering me an interested smile and I nodded at him. "The Windy City, is it really windy there?"

I laughed a little at that, it was a question a lot of people asked. I shook my head though and his smile dropped. "Not really, it's nice though. I liked it there" My voice turned sad as I said it and I noticed Sam watching me with the sad look in his eye that he had held earlier. I missed Chicago already, it was home, I knew it and I knew a lot of people there but I guess I would learn to know La Push, and its people. La Push would be home one day.

"You're a dancer right?" Jake asked again, he was full of questions obviously. My heart sunk and my stomach gave a nasty lurch. Dancing, the thing I used to love.

"I used to" I was a little blunt as I said it, the pain present in my voice and Sam stared down into the sand at his feet probably knowing the cause of the pain in my voice. He had asked me if I wanted to start a dance school over here when we were making arrangements for me to come, he had said there was one in a place called Forks not far from here but I said no, he tried telling me I couldn't stop just because of what happened but I felt otherwise. I couldn't dance anymore, it hurt too much.

"Claire will love you then, she is obsessed with ballerina's" Quil smiled fondly as he spoke, Claire was Emily's niece I think. Emily had mentioned her today saying I would meet her at the weekend.

"You don't dance anymore?" Kim's polite quiet voice popped up beside me and I turned to shake my head at her. "How come? There's a school here down in Forks, my little sister goes there its quite good"

My stomach dropped again and I felt the lump in my throat threatening to reappear. "I umm just grew out of it I guess" Lie, blatant lie. I had always loved dancing, never missed a practice session. I even went to rehearsal with tonsillitis when I was 11.

"You any good at it? Seth needs to learn some moves, needs to impress a girl at his prom next month. What was her name again? Gertrude wasn't it? Oh wait no that's the school nurse" Embry started laughing and nudging Seth who had turned fairly red at the ribbing he was getting. I wasn't going to answer him but I realised he was genuinely asking because he watched me waiting for a reply. Damn it. Next it would be 'can you show us some moves'.

"I guess, I mean I went to competitions and all that sort of stuff. The dance school I went to was one of the best in Chicago so it was more their reputation than my skill I think"

"I don't think it was their reputation that won you those medals and trophies you always used to shove in my face when I came for a visit" Sam laughed a little, the sad look in his eyes finally lifting and I smiled at the memory. When I was younger I would show off to him, he never did any sport so I took being an annoying little half sister in my stride and would sit there shoving my wins in his face while he fought the urge to hit me.

"Medals huh? So what we talking, third place?" Embry asked again, I hated talking about what I won; it made me feel big headed.

"Yeah some of them were third places"

"Sav stop being modest, you have like three third place ones from when you were like five. She came first place last year and the year before that, then she got second place with her partner and second with her dance group. She's not just good, she's amazing" I had to say, I was a little surprised he knew all that. And so was everyone else, everyone was staring at him with the look of surprise on each of their faces and Sam met it with a roll of his eyes. "What? I do actually listen when you ring me you know why are you always so surprised?" He shook his head at me before munching on his left over muffin.

I underestimated him, I always knew we weren't exactly close and I always knew I annoyed him when he came to visit therefore I always assumed I was a pain in his ass and that he didn't really like me. But I guess he did have some brotherly love for me, then I realised I knew nothing about him. I was a shit sister. "You've never seen me dance, I would hardly say I was amazing" I grumbled, I really hated people building me up like that. It made me feel up myself.

"Have too, you're on YouTube, your mom emailed my mom the link. So actually, I have seen you." He poked his tongue out now, serious Sam having a bit of fun. It seemed to shock everyone else as well because they were all frowning at him as if they had never seen this side of him. I had never seen this side of him to be fair. Then I realised what he said and my groaned all over again. My mom, she was one of those proud moms who showed me off every chance she got so of course she would send everyone she knew the link. I knew I was on YouTube but loads of dancers from competitions were so it never really bothered me until now.

"How are you two related again?" Collin piped up and a round of groans erupted around him, everyone gave him an annoyed look and Sam started shaking his head in disbelief. "What? It confuses me" Collin argued back at the people around him who were scowling and groaning. I wasn't sure why this was happening but they were annoyed.

"I've explained this to you nearly 20 times now Collin. Same dad, although I would hardly use that word to describe him" Sam grunted and I nodded in agreement. I realised the reason for the groaning though, Collin had obviously been told this many times now, but the kid was a cutie so it could be forgiven if he forgot.

"Asshole is a better term" I rarely used bad language out loud but I couldn't control myself if Josh Uley was involved. A few guys chuckled and Sam nodded back at me.

"I like her, I think we can keep her" Embry was chuckling a little and he winked at me as he said it, he seemed playful. I liked Embry; I liked most of them, all except one.

I looked over as a noise that could only be described as an animal growl filled the silence, Paul had gotten up and with one last angry look in my direction had began storming off down the beach, hands curled into tight balls and his shoulder squared as if ready to hit someone, probably me. The guy really hated me.

"What's his problem now?" Embry asked as everyone watched him storm off into the darkness. Me, I was his problem obviously.

"Who knows, probably wasn't enough filling in his sandwich or something" Jake shrugged it off and everyone grinned as if they could imagine him actually flying into a temper over that. He seemed easy to annoy.

"He's just being his usual grumpy self, not getting enough attention so he has to kick up a fuss" Quil joined in now and I glanced at Sam, he was watching Paul with interest but nodded at the comments being made. Jared on the other hand got up and began walking after his friend while Kim simply stared into the sand in front of her. The two of them knew it was me that was annoying Paul, although I wasn't sure what I had done. He was making me feel like shit though. I hated knowing someone didn't like me, but for some reason it hurt more when it was him. I actually felt pathetically desperate for him to like me.

**Paul's point of view**

I didn't hear much of what they were saying; I only took notice when she spoke. Her soft voice forcing my attention to snap on her, her perfect miss goody two shoes voice that was annoying the hell out of me. She was annoying the hell out of me, I didn't want her, I didn't want to be attached to some spoilt little girl who obviously got everything she ever wanted. I could tell her type just by looking at her, she wore a gold watch around her wrist that had some designer name engraved into it, it looked expensive, she wore a gold heart necklace around her neck too, and then she had perfectly straight hair that was obviously a dye job and expensive looking clothes. Rich kid who now had to slum it here. I heard them talking about her dancing, she was amazing Sam said, he was well and truly blowing her up as miss perfect. First place, medals, trophies. Proper little miss perfect she was. They were all wrapped around her little finger, hanging on every word she said and Sam was the worse. He barely knew the girl, they were only half siblings yet here he was acting protective big brother taking her in and acting like he actually knew her when they only saw each other once a year and he had bailed on their last visit because he didn't want to leave Emily.

"I like her, I think we can keep her" Embry joked now, his eyes watching the girl that sat opposite him. He liked her, I bet he liked her. He had been chatting with her all night, checking her out. My hands began shaking as he addressed her like she was some sort of pet dog who got the seal of approval. I noticed how she blushed when he said it and the sad glint she had worn in her eyes all night changed to a genuine smile. She liked him too.

Not that I cared, I didn't want her. I didn't want an imprint, I'm happy as I am. The way things are now, that's what I want, not her, not some teenage girl bringing drama into my life. I was 21, I needed a women not an 18 year old girl.

She turned to look at me, as did everyone. A growl ripped through my throat as I mulled over the imprint in my head, the way she had looked at me her eyes studying every inch of me, the pain that cross them as I walked away from her. I didn't want to be whipped and tied down like Sam and Jared, that wasn't who I was and she sure as hell was not going to be my little princess. The smile Embry caused dropped from her face instead she looked frightened, I scared her. My wolf growled at me for it, scaring her wasn't what I wanted to do. But then it was, if I scared her she would leave me alone or just leave.

I couldn't take it, I flew up and stormed away from my brothers, from her soft voice and pretty face, I kept going until I couldn't hear her fluttering heart beat anymore or smell her smell of honeysuckle and lemon. I had to get away from her.

"PAUL" Jared, I could hear his footsteps hammering after me but I kept walking, my whole body was shaking. I needed to get away. "Paul stop being such an asshole" He yelled at me as I got to the edge of the tree line that surrounded the parking lot. I would leave my car here, I needed to phase, to let my anger out. But I stopped, he was calling me the asshole? He was supposed to be on my side. But obviously she had him thinking the sun shined out of her ass too.

"Screw you" I growled back at him as he reached me shaking his head like I was the one in the wrong.

"She's done nothing wrong and you've spent all night glaring at her. She doesn't even know you and she's already scared of you, you're an asshole" He growled, she had stuck her nails into him as well.

"Back off Jared, she's done everything wrong. She shouldn't be here" I was shaking more, my hands becoming uncontrollable as I stared down my best friend.

"Oh come on that's hardly fair. She's here because Sam is her only family, it's not like she wanted her mom to die and leave her alone is it? I'm sure given a choice she would be in Chicago, lay off. This isn't her fault, it's not like she wanted it either" He was angry, he was glaring right back at me and it just made me hate her more. She had been here less than a day and she was causing problems between me and my pack brother. She was the problem.

"Don't lay that on me, like I care who died"

"You are such a jerk, such a jerk. Have a bit of consideration, she's lost her mom, been shipped to a place she doesn't know to live with people she barely knows and then you come along and make her feel even more scared than she probably already was. Get your head out of your ass for once Paul" He shouted at me and I had to hold myself back from hitting him, everyone was obviously on her side. Just because I imprint on the girl I now have to drop everything and be her little puppy dog like he is with Kim, screw that. She didn't have to come here, she could have stayed in foster care or something.

"Whatever" I turned and began walking toward the trees, I hated this. I hated her, I hated him, I just hated it. I wasn't the type of guy for an imprint, I didn't want that life or to be bound to one girl forever, I didn't want my life taken over by some little brat.

"Where are you going?" Jared yelled after me, he was pissed.

"Rachels" I growled, I needed to be normal, I needed to forget her and do what I do. I won't be hers.

"Oh like that's going to help. Real mature Paul, just carry on, go screw Rachel or whatever other girl you can find, I'm sure that will make everything better won't it. You're such an ass, why don't you try thinking with your brain for once rather than your dick?" He carried on yelling after me as I ran through the trees and toward the Black's house. I don't care what he said, I don't care about some little girl I just met. I wasn't changing for her, for anyone.

I kept running until I got there, Rachel was waiting, she always does. I looked down on her as I climbed in her window, she smiled up at me fluttering her long eyelashes, my eyes crawled over her body. But it wasn't the same, she looked plain and dull to me as she sat there eyeing me up like I was candy. She didn't look like she used to, she hadn't changed but something in me had, she wasn't as sexy as I once found her. She was plain, boring, average.

Imprint. Savannah. I growled at the thought of the person trying to ruin this, trying to whip me into a puppy on a leash. I wouldn't be like Jared, I wouldn't change for her, I didn't want her. I walked to the bed shedding my clothes as I went, I refused to give in.

I will not be hers.


	5. Chapter 5

Thank you for my first reviews, follows and faves! You guys are awesome, let me know any ideas you have for this story! And keep reading/commenting :D

Enjoy!

I do not own Twilight

* * *

_**And I, I can't come alive**_

_**I want the room to take me under**_

_**Cause I can't help but wonder**_

_**What if I, had one more night for goodbye?**_

_**If you're not here to turn the lights off I can't sleep**_

These four walls – Little Mix

I tossed and turned all night long, the sleep I so craved no longer within my reach. It wasn't a surprise that each time I closed my eyes and let the tiredness wash over my shivering body, the panic rose and with it came the million 'what ifs' and scenarios that fed the aching pains in my chest. I hadn't slept properly for months, at most I managed four hours a night but last night was worse, much much worse. I hadn't even got an hour, not one single hour of sleep. My body was running on empty and you could see it in the dark bags under my puffy eyes.

I had tried so desperately to sleep, each attempt failed until a little past 2am I gave in and succumbed myself to a night listening to the ticking of the clock that lay on the bedside table and the soft howling of the wind as it wrapped itself around the dense trees overlooking the tiny house. I hadn't been this restless since the weeks following my mother's death, and what was worse now was that I didn't have a legitimate reason to be so unsettled. Granted, I had never slept well since she died but recently it was easing up, but now I was back to square one. No sleep, just a constant feeling of panic and nerves. And I had no idea why I was having it now, I was worrying, panicking and nervous, but why I felt those emotions I had no idea.

So now I stood in front of the bathroom mirror trying to get rid of the evidence of my bad night, the bags under my eyes however had other ideas. Not even the desperate dabbing of foundation and powder was making them any better and not to mention my eyes were turning slightly bloodshot as I stared harder at myself. It almost looked like I had been up all night crying. I resided myself to the fact I would just have to go about the day looking a mess and pulled my clothes on, navy blue skinny jeans, a pair of fluffy white socks and a simple hoody, I couldn't be bothered with how I looked today, not that I was usually the type of girl to obsess over her wardrobe, but today I took my lack of fashion care to a whole new level.

"Sav" Sam's voice drifted up the stairs and I shifted myself from the bathroom to the hallway, I had been in there nearly half an hour trying to make my face look less death like. "Quil needs the toilet, if you're not out in two minutes he will just barge in" He called out again as I rounded on the top stairs, his eyes popped open as he saw me and he gave a little shrug before backing off into the kitchen that I could hear was occupying more people that just Emily and Sam, there was a soft buzz of chatter and a scrapping of a few chairs. My stomach gave a painful drop as I realised the guys were probably here, it was a Saturday and Emily had said they spent most days at the house, especially weekends.

"She takes longer than Leah to get ready, and that's saying something seeing as Leah takes twenty minutes just to shower" A young voice whined slightly making me frown, that name sounded familiar but I couldn't put my finger on where I heard it before. _Leah._ I didn't know a Leah but I knew that name. I shook it off and continued down the stairs, they creaked as I went and a new body appeared at the bottom. The tubbier one, Quil. He let out a long sigh of relief as he saw me and let his tensed shoulders droop.

"Finally, I been holding it in forever. No one come upstairs for a while" He was being deadly serious as he spoke and began dancing his way up the stairs doing a sort of jiggle as he pushed his way past me.

"Quil don't you dare take a dump in my bathroom. Quil are you listening to me?" Emily screeched, her yell was met only by a series of rough laughs coming from the bottom of the stairs and my stomach dropped again. They were nice guys, welcoming. But that didn't make them any less intimidating. "Why can you boys not go to your own house to use the bathroom? Sam you're going to have to put a lock on the door, especially now Savannah is here. Oh Savannah, I didn't realise you were there" Emily turned and clocked me as I stepped of the last stair into the kitchen, the others in the room turned and the attention shifted on to me. The nerves were back, I always felt ridiculous when I got so nervous around people because I had never felt nervous at competitions or shows where I danced in front of crowds, yet in front of a room of a few guys I felt like a nervous wreck.

My eyes darted to the floor as everyone else's darted to me. I didn't know who was here but there was a panicky feeling building in the bottom of my stomach and I felt the prickling feeling running over my skin that I had last night when Paul had quite literally growled angrily at me before storming off. My stomach dropped at the thought of him, it had been all night. Every time I let my over anxious thoughts lead back to him and how he looked at me with so much hatred, my stomach had dropped and I had felt physically sick. Much like I did right now.

"You want breakfast?" Emily's voice came back breaking through the mush that my brain had become in my cautious thoughts and worries. "I'm going to the store in a little while, you can come with me if you would like and chose some things that you like" I glanced up, the attention had gone from me and the guys in the room had returned their attention to their food. All except two men, Sam and Paul. He was here, the nausea washed over me again and I tried keeping my eyes on my brother, tried and failed. I couldn't help but glance at Paul as he lent over the kitchen island counter, his stare on me, shooting angry daggers at me. Sam was next to him, toast hanging out of his mouth and he seemed completely oblivious to the fact his friend was openly glaring at me, he had been oblivious to it last night too.

I realised Emily was waiting for my reply and I gave her a small smile and nod, her eyes narrowed as she took in my appearance and I blinked again trying hard to get rid of the redness that I knew lay there.

"Toast?" There was a small nudge on my arm and I looked down to see Embry holding out a plate that held only one slice of toast on it, he had a plate in front of him that was piled high with easily six slices. I couldn't help but frown at it; I got one piece while he had six?

"You are lucky you're even getting one slice off him" Another voice spoke up and I took notice of who else was here, Seth. The voices and laughs I had heard were from Sam, Seth, Embry, Quil and Paul. Not all of the guys I met last night but it was enough to make me feel self conscious. I gave Embry a smile and took the plate from him before sitting on the chair Seth had kicked out for me. I could feel him staring at me still, Paul's hot angry glare burned into my skin as I nibbled on the cold toast. I wasn't hungry, I was exhausted from my severe lack of sleep but I wasn't hungry.

"You know, I've been thinking" Seth suddenly piped up beside me, his deep voice causing me to jump slightly as it broke through the silence.

"That must have hurt" Embry mumbled, a smile in his voice. I had learnt quickly last night that these guys tormented one another rather a lot, there had been numerous fights like Emily had promised. At one point it had gotten a hell of a lot worse than the girls at my old dance school, bitchy comments had been thrown out without second thought and it even went as far as Quil throwing a cup of soda over the kid I think was called Brady. A comment had been made about someone called Claire which had caused a series of very girly 'oooo he went there's' to be thrown out by the guys who heard it. I came to the conclusion Claire was Quil's girlfriend, I had no idea why else he would get that defensive.

"Very funny. No, seriously I've been thinking right and I think that in a strange way you actually look like Sam" I glanced up as Seth spoke, realising he was on about me. He was staring hard at me as I nibbled slowly on the toast and I felt myself grimace. I didn't want to look like a boy, a man, whatever Sam was classed as now. He was male; I didn't want to look like him.

"Dude, they are siblings. Why are you so stupid?" Embry spoke slowly while Sam started chuckling from the kitchen area, the burning eyes were still on me though, never leaving, never giving up the glare.

"Oh no, I think she looks like her mom" The soft female voice of Emily intervened now and my stomach dropped horribly again causing my body to go cold. My mom, she had been beautiful in a classic way. She never tried too hard to look beautiful because it was natural. I didn't look like her. I shook my head trying desperately not to let the horrible feeling that lay in my stomach show on my face.

"Well I wouldn't know what her mom looked like but trust me, you're a better looking version of Sam" Seth carried on and Sam gave out an over dramatic gasp.

"I would hardly say better looking, I think I got the looks and she got the brains" He faked the sound of shock and I glanced up at him, he was trying to make me smile. It wasn't working though; I was too tired to smile. "Emily is right though, she looks like her mother" He added in with a kind smile and any shadow of a smile I held vanished. I didn't look like her.

"I think she got both" Embry joined in now and gave me a quick wink before gobbling down his remaining slice of toast. He ate like a pig. He looked over at my plate, his eyes landing on my toast that had the most pathetic nibbles taken out of it. "Are you gonna eat that?" His hand moved for it even before I answered him, he was a greedy pig.

"Embry don't you dare" Emily scolded from her place in-between Sam and Paul but Embry had already bitten into it, his face turning into a sheepish smile as he looked over at Emily, his cheeks stuffed with toast. "You are such a pig, Sam give her your toast" She nudged Sam now and his eyes went wide as he glanced down at the last slice on his own plate, it was like watching a kid being told to give away his favourite toy. He actually looked sad as he stared at the toast. I watched as he looked back up at Emily, as if silently pleading with her to not give away his food. It went on for what felt like the most awkward five minutes of my life, Sam kept glancing at the toast then at Emily who was making big obvious eye movements between the toast and me, she would go ape if he didn't give me the toast. I didn't even want it, I felt sick as hell.

"For god sake, just take mine" Paul suddenly flared up and marched across before slamming his plate down on the table in front of me. His hands were curled into angry tight balls, his knuckles turning white. My eyes trailed up his arm, his muscles were twitching and I tried not letting myself go further but I did. I looked all the way up until I saw his fury filled face, his eyes weren't meeting mine he was just scowling at the wall behind me, his body still as if he were trying to regain control over himself, his breathing laboured. He really hated me. "I'm going to work" He finally spoke, his voice low and controlled, as if he were speaking through clenched teeth. I watched as his fists began shaking and he turned and stormed from the house in the same angry manner he had stormed from the beach the night before.

What had I done? I had barely said a word to the guy yet he hated me.

"Don't let him get to you; he probably didn't get screwed last night" Seth grumbled from beside me and a slice of toast came flying through the air and smacked him square in the face. I glanced up expecting to see Sam but it was Emily who had her eyes glaring at Seth and her hand held up, she had thrown it at him. I wasn't sure why but she looked angry as she stared at the young boy next to me, I guessed it was because he used the phrase 'screwed'.

_Screwed. _

The meaning of that phrase dawned on me. Paul had a girlfriend. That simple thought was enough to send my already sinking stomach dropping all over again and I had to push down the nausea that threatened to rise. Paul had a girlfriend, I didn't know him but the thought of it bothered me slightly. Probably because I didn't understand how any girl could love a man as angry and unkind as he was. Paul obviously didn't like me, but I didn't care for him much either. He was unnecessarily mean.

I looked up from my plate again and met my brothers eyes, he was watching me with a curious expression on his face. His eyes dropped from mine as he saw me looking at him and they flickered to the doorway Paul had just stormed out of. His thick eyebrows furrowed together and his eyes danced with different emotions as if he were giving something a lot of hard thought, the sound of footsteps behind me took my attention away and a groan followed a loud stamp of a foot against the wooden stairs.

"What did I miss this time?" Quil's groan came right after the foot stamp and Embry looked up smiling at his friend.

"Nothing new, Paul got pissed and stormed out. Everyday occurrence, come back tomorrow and you'll probably see it all over again" Embry spoke with a sort of singing tone to his voice, Quil snorted with a little bit of laughter before walking from the stairs to the gap between Embry and I and sat down. He looked at me, his eyes taking in the obviously confused and intimidated expression I knew I was wearing and he grinned with amusement.

"You'll get used to it. You done with that?" He pointed at my toast and as with Embry before I could say no he had already reached for it and shovelled it all into his mouth. Emily let out a quick agitated huff before another slice of toast flew through the air, Embry ducked in time for it to fly over him and it hit Quil in the side of the head.

"For the love of god, stop eating her breakfast"

* * *

...

**Paul pov**

I could smell her as soon as I hit the yard, the scent of honeysuckle and lemon drifted through the open window to the guest room, her room. Every nerve in my body stood on end and I fought against the shiver that wanted to run through my spine. I wouldn't act like Jared did with Kim, I wouldn't let myself be whipped into knowing everything about her. Her scent wouldn't drive me wild.

The smell only became more potent as I stepped into the open front door, the house was covered in it and she had been here 24 hours. Emily looked up and smiled at me from the stove, she was stirring something but I couldn't smell it. All I could smell was her, Savannah. I heard my pack brothers mumble hellos to me but I didn't respond, I just made my way toward Emily praying that her smell would take over the one that was making me shake with lack of control. It did, as I got closer I smelt the usual smell of roses that drifted from Emily and the needy feeling that lay deep within my stomach settled. Emily's smell took my concentration from the one drifting from upstairs, I didn't miss the strange look Sam gave me though as I settled myself next to his imprint. I never got this close to her or Kim, not because I disliked them but because they weren't mine to get close to. I had to though; I couldn't be in this house if all I smelt was her.

"What is she doing man? I am dying here" Quil groaned and I glanced down at him as he sat at the table, he was squirming in his seat, his big hand rubbing on his tubby stomach.

"She's a girl what do you expect? She's probably doing her make up or something stupid like that" Embry shrugged at his best friend and I realised quickly who they were talking about. Their new best friend. The shakes started in my hands again, just the thought of her made me angry, made me want to punch something. She had waltzed in here and within a matter of hours had everyone wrapped around her perfectly manicured little finger. Little rich city girl having to slum it in La Push.

"Oh I really can't hold this in, I'm going to have to go outside dude" Quil groaned again and his gut made a deep purring noise, he obviously needed a shit.

"You are not going to the toilet outside my house Quil Ateara. You can wait like a normal human being, she won't be that much longer" Emily scolded from beside me and handed me a few slices of buttered toast. "Besides, she's probably having a bath and relaxing, she barely slept last night" Her voice turned softer now, motherly and caring. It made my shakes start up all over again and I had to grip the counters edge to calm myself. She cared for the girl after 24 hours, the girl that didn't belong here. Half Quileute or not, she wasn't from here, she shouldn't be involved in this life, involved with my life.

"What do you mean? She was asleep when I checked on her before patrol" Sam cut in now and my shakes rolled out again, Sam was a caring guy but how he suddenly jumped up and took on Savannah had pissed me off from the beginning. Everyone else applauded him for being so caring over his half sister, me, I knew she would be trouble. You can't bring an outsider here with all the danger around us wolves and expect her not to become involved.

"No, she just had her eyes shut. I kept checking on her and she would do that to me but every time I shut the door I heard her get up again, her light was still on at three this morning. It was a trick I used to do on my father when I was her age, I never used to sleep well and I ould squeeze my eyes shut when he came to check on me. Anyway, when I woke up at six I could hear her walking around the bedroom, tossing and turning and then she got up when you came back in. I guess it's her first night, she just needs to get more comfortable" Emily explained and I watched as my best friend's face fell into concern. Concern for the little sister he barely knew.

"Well she can get comfortable down here, that's it I'm going up" Quil flew up from his seat but Sam beat him to the stairs and pushed him back.

"You are not just barging in their Quil" Authority rang in his voice, out of habit. He hadn't been able to order Quil for over a year now, didn't stop his alpha voice coming into play with the annoying pup though. He turned and shouted up the stairs instead, his shout being met with the opening of a door and footsteps along the carpeted floor above us. She was out. I knew it both from the sound of her walking and the stronger smell drifting down toward me, my body swayed a little and I had to shut my eyes to try fighting it off. I couldn't stand that smell. It wasn't a bad smell, but it was her and I couldn't stand her.

My eyes stayed shut, waiting as the footsteps got closer and closer until even the scent of roses coming from Emily couldn't mask the smell. She was in here. She was too close. I peered up and sure enough she was stood at the bottom of the stairs, the look of her short body stood there, drowning in a big hoody made my stomach drop and my body sway again. She looked scared, paler than she should be, she glanced up for a minute and I saw her puffy bloodshot eyes, bags lay under them. She looked exhausted, sad. A little ounce of me wanted to check she was ok but I pushed it back, I didn't care if she was ok. Her act wouldn't fool me, she wouldn't have me wrapped around her finger. I wasn't hers, I never would be. I did not care about her.

The stare I gave her turned now, hot rage bubbled within me and I could barely hear the words my brothers spoke around me. All I focused on was her, the way she smiled as Embry offered her some of his toast. Of course he would, Embry was the kind one, the one who didn't have a mean bone in his body. Of course he would reach out to her. I gripped the counter harder, the wood began crumbling under my fingertips but I couldn't remove my stare from her. I needed her to know, to know that I didn't want her, that I didn't want her here. She ruined everything.

"You're a better looking version of Sam" Seth's young voice brought my attention back to the room, he was looking at her from the corner of his beady little eyes. His young face alight with fondness as he watched the older girl next to him, her face flushed slightly as he spoke. Better looking than Sam, it wasn't a hard thing to achieve. Seth liked her; he had been over talkative with her last night, over complementing her and asking too many questions. He was only 15 and very into girls at the minute, but he couldn't have her.

I heard more people talking around me but I didn't hear their words, I just watched as Seth carried on watching Savannah, she had stopped pathetically nibbling her toast now and had dropped it to her plate. Her face draining of colour again and her eyes flickered to mine for the tiniest of moments before looking away, her breath hitched when she saw me watching her. She was scared of me. I didn't want to frighten the girl but I didn't want her to think I cared for her, I didn't. I wouldn't.

Embry's hand shot out and grabbed the remaining toast from her plate, within a second it was all in his mouth. I wanted to scream at him, tell him to give it back but I stopped myself. It wasn't my business. Emily started yelling from beside me now, her little body giving a tiny fist slam to the kitchen counter as she scolded Embry before trying to force Sam to give his toast up. I could see him breaking, he didn't want to give her his toast but as he looked at his imprint I could see his defiance draining. He would give in to Emily's demand soon enough, they always did. Like little puppy dogs who couldn't think for themselves. It went on for a while though; Sam was being uncharacteristically stubborn with Emily for once, his puppy dog look shooting from her to the toast. It was just toast. I looked back to the table, Savannah was watching me now, her own stare fixed on me. I didn't want her looking at me, thinking she could be around me. I didn't want her around me. She was causing enough issues being here. I needed to leave. The shaking in my hands had spread, my arms were twitching. Dying to let my wolf out.

"Oh for god sake, just take mine" I growled out as Sam's stare off with Emily continued and I grabbed my untouched plate of toast and stormed to the space beside her, dropping the plate in front of her with such force her body jumped a little. I could feel her eyes travelling over my body, burning me with each second they stared. I looked straight ahead though, I couldn't look at her. I couldn't risk it, seeing her looking at me would make me lose the tiny ounce of control I had left. I turned as she reached my face, my hands began shaking too violently to stay in here any longer so I turned and stormed out. Away from her, away from her scent and from the thudding inside her chest.

The fresh air bought a calm over me but it wasn't enough, I needed to be free. I ran to the cover of the trees, my harsh breathing finally letting the shakes roll over my body and the fierce hot rage boiled through my veins until the exploding sensation crawled over my skin and I was on all fours. My anger surging through me, she wound me up. Without doing anything she wound me up. In 24 hours she had ruined everything.

"Oh get over it, you sound like a girl" Jared's annoyed voice rolled through my head now, I glanced round but I couldn't see him. He was on patrol somewhere but he wasn't near me.

_Screw you. _

I growled back at him but he gave a short agitated chuckle in response. "Oo sorry, is the tiny little girl annoying you? What did she do now, breathe wrong?"

My head went through it all, the last night of my life that had gone from bad to worse. Seeing her looking up at me at the beach, her big blue eyes staring right into mine, she ruined it all. She worked her way in with MY friends, worked her way into MY life, a life she didn't belong in. Rich girl from the city. Then Rachel, fucking Rachel. She was all wrong last night. Her tanned skin was too dark, her eyes were brown and lifeless, her hair black and dull, no life to it. Her lips too thin, her body too thin. She had been all wrong, I couldn't do it. I couldn't even kiss her without feeling repulsed.

"HA" Jared barked with laughter as he rifled his way through my thoughts, I could feel his smug pleasure at my thoughts. He was loving every minute of watching me suffer. "Dude, I could have told you it wouldn't work with Rachel. She's not her, she's not Savannah"

He sounded cocky now and I wanted to find him just to rip his throat out. I didn't want Savannah; she was a kid, a girl. "Yeah but she's your girl, your Rachel Black days are over. No more quick screws while Billy is out for you dude, she's the wrong girl" He sung happily now and I growled at him, he just laughed though. He was loving it.

"I don't want Savannah. She's not my girl" I fought back but he hummed in pleasure as he trotted along the La Push/Forks border.

"Have a fun life being alone then. Savannah doesn't need you, as far as she's concerned right now you are just the asshole who keeps glaring at her, she can move on and happily find someone else but you, well you are screwed. As much as you think you don't want her, she's yours. No other girl will ever match up to her man. Trust me." He was enjoying this far too much; he loved every minute of my torture. "Talking about girls, it's time I go see mine. Lighten up Paul; it's not like Savannah asked for this either. Don't punish her for something she can't control, but I would love to go over what happened with Rachel later" He chuckled again as he made his way for Kim's house, his mind flashing me comments about how disappointed Rachel must have been when my little guy 'deflated' on her.

Asshole.

I went to run for him but he phased out, I reached the edge of the trees near Kim's but I couldn't go further. Instead he turned and flicked his middle finger at me before backing his way into her yard and out of sight. Asshole. She wasn't mine, she may not have asked for this but she caused it.

I felt another wolf phase in, my mind went blank as I waited for confirmation on who it was and it didn't take me long to get it.

"Paul, you seriously need to learn to control yourself. Do you know how close you were to phasing and directly next to Savannah"

That was it, I phased out without giving myself time to even think about her. I didn't need Sam knowing. I didn't need anyone knowing. Especially not Sam, he was taking this big brother role too seriously and I knew it would cause a fight. One I couldn't be bothered to have. I hadn't slept at all last night, I was exhausted.

I walked back into the trees, my naked body not feeling the cold wind as I made my way toward my house. I didn't want this. She was ruining everything. I was fine with my life, I wasn't interested in a relationship and Rachel was fine with that. She was only here until she found a job, she was quick and easy as hell and Jacob didn't have the slightest idea what was going on because he was too dumb and too far up Renesmee Cullens ass to notice anything else other than what the kid genius was doing. And now, as well as my freedom, Savannah had managed to take that away from me too. No matter what Jared said, this wasn't my fault; she was the one who came here. If she had just stayed in Chicago then my life would have been just fine.


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for everyone reading, next two chapters of this story to get it moving. Let me know ideas or comments! :D**

I followed Emily around the store, my mind not really on the task at hand. I simply nodded and agreed with every food item she held up for me, I hadn't the faintest idea what she had bought for me to eat because the whole time my mind had been lingering on a subject I didn't want to linger on, Paul. I had never in my life met anyone as rude as him, especially not someone I hadn't done anything to. If I had annoyed him, or been nasty to him first then maybe his behaviour could be excused but the guy didn't know me. I was a stranger to him yet he seemed ok with acting like an absolute ass to me and the other guys just shrugged it off as if it were his normal behaviour. Which again, is undeniably rude and arrogant of him if he goes around treating everyone like they are not worth his time?

Part of me wanted to appreciate the fact he had given me his breakfast this morning, but then the other half of me knew he had only done it to stop whatever childish moment Sam had been having and he had not only slammed it down in front of me but then proceeded to clench his fists as if he were refraining from hitting me before storming from the house like a child having a tantrum.

I just didn't understand him. I didn't know why I cared so much but he bothered me, he really bothered me.

"Savannah" Emily called out bringing me back from my Paul trance. I glanced over at her, she was on the other side of the aisle to me and was holding up what looked like tofu, I scrunched my nose. I hated that stuff, I may not eat meat but I didn't want to eat cardboard either. "I am out of ideas what to cook you then" She placed it back down and turned to me, she looked deflated as she walked back to where I stood with the cart. We weren't in La Push, we had driven easily an hour to get to this grocery store, apparently the one in La Push was tiny and the one in Forks not much better, so here we were.

"I just eat what everyone else does minus the meat, honestly I don't need special foods Emily" I shrugged at her, she was trying to be nice and make me feel at home but this vegetarian thing was throwing her.

"But I cook meat and potatoes for the guys, you can't live off potatoes. What do you eat normally?" She whined a little as she fished for more ideas, she meant what did I eat back home. My stomach dropped in its usual painful way and I had to look away from her, even something as simple as telling her what I ate hurt because it related to my mother. I shrugged a little and heard her huff as she pushed the cart up the aisle.

I had to say something; she was being kinder than she needed to be. "Mostly things like vegetarian lasagne, or pasta with a tomato sauce. Broccoli and cheese bake, that's my favourite. But I am happy with a plate of fries, I'm vegetarian but I don't normally watch what I eat. As you can tell" I signalled over my body, I wasn't stick thin, I wasn't fat but I wasn't stick thin. Much to the annoyance of my dance teachers, they always wanted a tiny girl who could be thrown around with ease, Kyle always managed just fine. Like I said, I wasn't fat, I unlike the other dancers had an extra layer to me, I wasn't a size zero. I had shape, I had an ass and I was damn proud of it.

"I can do those things, and don't get me started. You are perfect the way you are and don't mention weight issues around the guys, they will be shoving candy bars down your neck faster than you can say diet" She smiled at me before walking off toward the vegetable section. I couldn't be bothered to rectify it with her that I didn't actually think I was fat and so I took her advice and walked after her, simply watching as she piled vegetables into the cart. It didn't take long for my mind to wonder back to ass face. He didn't have an ass face; he was quite beautiful, too beautiful. I lingered too long on his face when I saw him, he was the most handsome guy I had ever met but I wouldn't crush on him, I couldn't because of his bad attitude.

I stayed silent as Emily paid and bagged the shopping up; she was eyeing me up suspiciously as we left the store and crammed everything into her little car. It was an old car, it clunked as she drove it but she didn't seem bothered. I guess I was just used to seeing newer cars, back in Chicago most of the kids in my school had huge big truck like cars, mostly brand new of course. I never learnt how to drive, mom couldn't afford it and I wasn't that bothered. I wasn't materialistic, all I needed was my dance shoes and a beat and I was happy.

We hit the trees of La Push before I fully realised we had been driving that long, Emily was silent but I felt her watching me now and then. We slowed down as we reached a bend in the road and I glanced at Emily to see her not even looking at the road but at the trees, a fond smile on her face as she looked. It was like she had seen someone she knew but when I looked there was no one there. She let her eyes go back on the road but her smile didn't fade, she was smiling for no reason. She was a kind and happy woman but that was going too far, she couldn't be happy because she saw the trees surely?

"Savannah, I invited Kim over for dinner tonight. Sam is at work and so is Jared so I figured we could have a girls night. Would that be ok with you?" She glanced at me now noticing that I had been watching her, her smile dropped and I knew I had made her self conscious but I hadn't been looking at her scars, she had just confused me. She had literally smiled at the trees. I nodded a little not really thinking about what she said, then it struck me that I had no idea what Sam worked as.

"What do they do?" I looked back at the woman next to me, her body went a little stiff and her hands gripped the steering wheel tighter but she quickly put a smile on her face and the little car sped up.

"They umm do some work for the tribe, mostly handy work but at nights they do a sort of security. They just check the res out, make sure everything is ok. They are saving up to start their own business in home jobs, like decorating or handy man work. It doesn't pay great but it is ok for now. Sam does a lot of night shifts which I hate but I suppose it's better now your here, I won't be alone at night. It's a small house but I am such a wimp" She chuckled a little, her voice easing up as she continued her words. He worked for the tribe, he had an air of importance around him. I had noticed it even in his voice when we used to talk on the phone. About a year ago, maybe more than that he had changed, his voice had gotten lower, more serious and authoritive. Even over the phone. I guess he was important to his tribe; they obviously were to him because he had a tribal tattoo on his arm.

That was cool I suppose, tribe spirit and all that. I had never known much about my Quileute background or even that I was Quileute until I was maybe nine when some girl made a comment about my mixed ethnicity and I questioned mom on why I was darker than the other girls and why Sam was dark skinned too, she then tried explaining as best she could but she didn't know anything about the Quileute's. Mom had got pregnant only three weeks after meeting Josh Uley, she had fallen head over heels for him at the tender age of 18. She fell for his good looks and tanned skin, apparently he was a real charmer and the fact he was older than her sealed the deal, he made her feel different to what the other boys at her school did. He bailed when she found out she was pregnant though, I never knew why she used his surname for me, part of me thought that she hoped if she named me after him he would suddenly become interested in me but she had never admitted that. He didn't ever become interested though and not long after I was born she went looking for him only to find out he had left a wife and son behind in La Push before knocking her up. She contacted Sam's mother, she disliked my mom at first but from what my mom told me she then took pity on the teenage girl who had been left by the same man who also screwed her over. They decided to keep in touch, let Sam and I know each other which I was grateful for. I liked the fact I had a big brother, even if I barely knew him. Maybe now I would learn about my background, mom could never tell me much because she didn't really know that much.

The guys last night talked a bit about the tribal histories, a few mentioned the stories and the little girl Nessie had seemed intent on hearing them all over again but was told she had to wait for a man named Billy. I guess they had their own traditions of telling the histories. The guys all had the same tattoo as Sam, I had noticed it last night. They were all dressed in simple t-shirts but the arms were stretched against their muscles and I could see bits of the tattoo poking out of each one, even Seth had one. I couldn't tell if the younger two did, they were in hoodies but Seth was only 14/15.

"How come Sam's friends with all the younger guys, aren't they all stupidly younger than him?" I had found it slightly weird, Brady and Collin were no older than 14 yet they hung out with grown men. Emily shrugged a little before turning into a small dirty track that led to her house.

"The Quileute's are a small tribe, they look after one another and a lot of the younger ones look up to Sam, Jared and Paul. I guess they don't mind if it means they are on the right track you know?"

I couldn't help but snort as she said Paul, he was an ass. How could anyone look up to him? He would turn Seth into a horrible mini Paul if he spent too much time with him, although Seth was far too nice for that.

"What?" She seemed a little started by the sound I had made and pulled to a stop outside her house, she was looking at me a little taken aback.

"It's just that Paul is an asshole, I couldn't imagine anyone looking up to him" I regretted it as soon as I said it, he was her friend and I just insulted him. Her face fell into a serious look, like she was thinking through my words and I slapped my hand to my mouth. "I'm sorry" I squeaked and went to get out of the car but she started laughing.

"Don't worry, Paul can be a handful at times but he has a big heart deep down. You just have to give him a chance to show it. He would never see any harm come to the boys or to Kim and I for that matter, he's ok when you get to know him" She nodded reassuringly at me and I had to bite back my urge to laugh, I couldn't imagine Paul having a big heart. He was too arrogant and angry for that, but she knew him better than me so maybe she was right. I doubted it, but I guess I would see over time.

"I could ask Sam to talk to him if he's bothering you?" Emily shouted out to me as she unloaded the grocery bags onto the kitchen counter, it took me a second to understand who she meant and when I did I quickly shook my head. That would make it worse, I shouldn't even be bothered by the guy let alone running to Sam because he's slightly mean to me. He hasn't even been mean, he's just not been friendly.

"No it's fine, he just seems a little intimidating but like you said, he will be ok when I get to know him more" I dropped my bags next to her and gave her a brief smile but it was forced. I didn't want to get to know Paul. He was someone I would rather distance myself from. Yet, I couldn't find a way to stop the niggling thoughts annoying me. The niggling thoughts that always brought me back to him.


	7. Chapter 7

I was bored.

I was desperate to find something to take my mind off the lingering thoughts of Paul and so far had come up with watching Desperate Housewives, which I had been doing since I finished unloading groceries with Emily at 1pm. It was now 6:30pm. Emily had the complete boxset, apparently she too was a fan and she watched it with me until about 3 when she got bored and ran off outside to find Sam who had been building something with wood.

I was in my yoga pants with a plain black strappy top and a zip up hoody over the top, led on the sofa with a bowl of popcorn in front of me just staring at the screen. And I was now bored, not even my favourite TV show was distracting me. But thankfully, the thoughts had travelled from Paul to home, if I were at home in Chicago right now I would be at dance school. I would be flying through the partner routine with Kyle that we were due to perform next month at a dance competition. But I wasn't there, I was here and I was being lazy. I missed dance, every inch of my body missed and craved for dance but my heart wasn't in it. I couldn't do it, I hadn't danced since the day she had died. I had tried but I couldn't do it. I needed that push, a reason to put myself out there and do it. But I didn't have one, I wasn't sure if I ever would.

"Savannah, are you actually going to move from that position today?" Sam's head suddenly appeared upside down in my vision and I glanced up at him. He had bent himself over the couch and was staring at me with a slight frown on his face. I simply 'mm'd him and he rolled his eyes before standing upright and moving around so he was perched on the armchair beside the sofa. "I have to go to work now, Emily has just gone to get Kim but she shouldn't be long" He spoke as he bent over taking off his shoes and socks. I expected him to reach for a new pair but he didn't, he just stood up taking a handful of popcorn with him. "I'll see you in the morning, ask Emily if you need anything and don't just sit there watching that crap all night" He walked away and his voice grew louder, he sounded amused as he spoke about watching TV yet part of me felt like he was trying to actually tell me not to do it, not controlling but authoritive maybe?

My eyes followed him as he walked to the door and opened it, he was still barefoot.

"Sam, you've not got any shoes on" I called out to him and he went stiff for a minute, like Emily had in the car when I asked her what Sam worked as. His head cocked itself back to me before giving a slight shrug.

"They are in the car; I'll see you in a bit. And Sav, I meant what I said about the TV; you'll fry your brain watching that crap" He gave a wave before heading out into the grey evening.

"It's not crap" I called out after him and heard his grunt in reply, Despo was not crap. I was addicted to it, it was a perfectly decent show.

I listened to the silence, waiting for his truck to start but no noise came. I sat in silence for ten minutes and still nothing, not a single noise. Then the silence became deafening in itself, I felt alone. For the first time since arriving here I actually was alone. My eyes travelled around the house, the tiny homely house that was warm and inviting thanks to Emily's housekeeping skills and Sam decorating, it was simple but inviting. My old house had been tiny, it didn't fit in with the area we lived in. It stuck out like a sore thumb to be precise. We had a tiny house in amongst normal size suburban houses that held families with three or four kids and big nice looking cars. We had a two bedroom house, decorated nicely but obviously well within my mom's minimum wage pay check. I had always wished she didn't do it but she worked her ass off in a dead end job to pay the bills, she rarely had money for herself because the last spare cash went to my dance, I told her she didn't need to. I told her I wouldn't mind quitting but she knew I loved it and she wanted me to be happy. My happiness ultimately killed her, she had worked overtime at the diner she worked at so she could buy me a new leotard, I didn't need one but she wanted me to look good at the next show. She had worked later than usual, she was rushing to get to me and see me dance and because she worked that little bit later, because she was rushing to see me, she died.

My eyes stung as tears prickled into them, the burning sensation forcing me to blink and gulp back the lump that had formed in my throat. I missed home, I missed her. But I couldn't cry because if I started I would never stop. I needed a new distraction, Despo wasn't doing it anymore. I grabbed at my phone that lay beside the popcorn bowl, I had had a few missed calls from friends back home but I hadn't replied, I didn't want to but I had to. If I didn't then I would sit here and panic over things I couldn't change, my mom dying, me being here, me not dancing, Paul.

I tapped the screen and Kerry's name flashed up, the ringing tone urging me to sit up right on the comfy sofa.

"Hello" Her happy voice chirped and my heart did a little drop, I never had many friends, hardly any outside of my dance school but Kerry was a good one. She had been in my class since we were toddlers.

"Hey Ker"

"Ahh I was wondering when you would call, Savannah it's been two whole days. I had no idea if you had arrived safely or if you were even alive" She squealed and I had to roll my eyes, she was always so overdramatic. If I had died then I am sure she would have heard it by now.

"I'm fine, I got here yesterday morning. It's been a little crazy though, meeting everyone and trying to settle in here."

"I can imagine, is it a nice place? The name sounds really pretty and mystical, what's it like?" I could hear music drumming behind her voice, chatter with the occasional call. She was at dance, I could tell just from the background noise because it was a noise I spent most days in when I was still in Chicago.

I stood up and walked slowly to the kitchen as I spoke, my eyes scanning the pictures on the walls as I went. "It is very pretty. It's nice, it's not home but it's nice"

"How's your brother? Is it awkward?"

This had been something I had worried about; we knew one another but not enough to live together. But so far it had been ok. "He's fine, he's at work. He lives with his fiancé who is really nice too, it's not awkward it's ok" My voice wasn't so sure though, I tried sounding sure, I felt somewhat sure but I sounded sad.

"Just ok? You don't fill me with much hope, why do you sound so sad?" Her own happy voice dipped to a worried tone now, the background noise left and I knew she had probably gone outside to talk to me. My stomach was in a twisted clench, I wasn't so sure why I sounded or felt as weird as I did right now. I felt sad, but not sad in a way that I wanted to sit and cry, I just felt sad. Hearing her voice made me miss home even more, it was nice here and the people were friendly but it wasn't home, not yet.

"I'm not sad, I just miss home. I just wish things were different, but it's not this place. Most of the people here are nice" I stopped talking then, most of the people, not all. Not one in particular, he was mean and he had been torturing me all day internally, he hadn't even been here but my mind was in a knot trying to understand why I cared so much what he thought.

"We all wish things had been different, you are 18 soon. You can always come back for college; you are only there because you needed a guardian. You won't need one soon, one day you will be home again. Anyway, what do you mean by most? Has someone upset you?" I nodded as she spoke and leant myself in against the kitchen counter, my body curled over it and my hips digging into the edge of the hard wood. I was twiddling with a pen that was left on the side, flicking it around my fingers as I talked.

"I haven't even applied for College so that idea is over before it begins; it's not even that I don't want to be here though. It really is a lovely place but" I paused and blinked the tears away again. "It's not home" I finally sighed out and Kerry gave a sigh in response.

"First off, you applied for that scholarship summer programme, you could get into that so don't be so down about it all. And secondly, no it's not home as you know it but it could grow to be, you never liked the city anyway"

My stomach dropped all over again, my body covered itself in a nervous chill and I glanced down at the counter beneath my bent over body. The summer programme, I wouldn't get in anyway, I wasn't good enough for that. Nor would I go, I couldn't dance so what was the point in going to a summer arts programme if the art I was trained in no longer worked for my body or heart. But I wouldn't have got in, I wasn't good enough.

"No, no one has upset me. I just don't know these people, I miss you guys" I ignored her last comments completely and dived back to her asking me if someone had upset me, she went quiet as if trying to figure out where that had come.

"We miss you too" Was all I heard her say because a sudden sound behind me caused me to flip myself around against the counter, my heart suddenly racing as I realised I wasn't alone. Paul was stood by the door just staring at me. I hadn't the faintest idea how long he had been there but he looked annoyed as he watched me, almost as if fighting to not say something to me.

I zoned out of Kerry's voice then, all I could hear was my own thumping heart beat as the angry man across the room started walking toward me. His facial expression changing with each step, he looked angry still but as if he was smelling a bad smell, like he was trying to hold his breath and not smell the air around him. I didn't smell, I didn't think I did anyway. I could feel myself getting hotter, his eyes didn't lift from me and I knew I was beginning to blush from the unwanted attention. He got to the breakfast bar before stopping and his expression softened to a basic stare, not angry, not happy, he just looked at me.

"I need to grab something for Sam" He grunted and I nodded quickly back as he made his way around toward me, his movements slower than before. He was clenching his fists again and for a second I wanted to run, I thought he would hit me but I stayed put, something telling me he wouldn't. He stopped directly beside me, his eyes still watching my face, scanning over me as if sizing me up and his stiff shoulders slouched down, I wasn't a threat. He didn't move though, he leant against the counter like I was and just watched me, the heat began rising again and my heartbeat grew so loud I was sure he would be able hear it if I didn't make some noise soon.

"I need that cupboard" He spoke first, his voice harsh and growling as if he was speaking through clenched teeth. He hated me, it was so obvious. I had no idea who he was nor did he know me but he hated me anyway. I jumped back suddenly aware of his words and just how close our bodies were, I was on fire, every part of my skin was tingling in a sort of anticipating heat, my stomach was clenched and on edge, waiting for the drop that didn't come. I moved back, but not far enough. As he moved for the cupboard I could still feel his body heat on mine, he was just as scorching as the others were. It was abnormal.

"Are you even listening to me?" Kerry's voice jolted back into my focus and I let myself fall further away from the man in front of me, he had stopped staring at me now. He was rummaging through the drawers by where I was stood, his jaw twitching as he did so.

"Uhh yeah sorry, what was that?" I mumbled, my voice was quivering as I spoke and I knew I sounded strange, scared. I had no idea what Paul would do, he was intimidating and he knew it. He played on it.

"I said Kyle misses you like crazy, he hasn't been the same since you left. He doesn't like the other girls, none of them are as good as you" She repeated herself and my heart did a whole new thud, this time for Kyle. My dance partner since I was 10, he was an amazing dancer and a great friend. My eyes lingered on Paul, his rummaging froze and his body went tense again, a soft growl echoed through the room and I was sure it came from him, he looked like he was vibrating as he clenched the drawer in his fists. The noise had been animalistic, a human couldn't growl like that but there were no animals in the house, it couldn't have been him surely. His body arched as if trying to calm himself down and I noticed his hand turning white as it gripped the kitchen counter, he was really pissed. I hadn't even done anything.

"I umm I miss him too" I tried speaking normally, I tried not to focus on the man in front of me but I could barely think let alone string a sentence together.

"He's not here right now, he's out getting food but he wants to speak to you. He misses his girl." Kerry went on and again Paul's body arched, his head bowed his time, his jaw clenching together and his eyes squeezing shut for a minute, he was trying to regain himself. Trying to not be so angry but he was failing, his vibrations turned to shakes and his jaw began twitching as he kept his head bowed. He didn't even have a reason to be angry.

"I'll ring him tomorrow" I squeaked again, I couldn't focus on anything but the shaking man before me.

"That's good, hey I have to go, but don't go forgetting to ring or text me. And don't be so sad, you don't have to stay there long. Bye Savannah" I whispered my own goodbye back before lowering my phone to the counter, Paul sent the drawer slamming back into its slot and my body jerked back in surprise from the noise it made.

He said nothing, he just kept shaking and clenching his whole body as he reached up to the cupboard and looked for whatever it was he needed. I couldn't even breathe properly as I stood and watched him look over the shelves with his eyes, I couldn't move. I couldn't even force myself to walk away from him so I stood like an idiot and watched him.

"Great" He suddenly growled and stood back, his eyes trained on the very top shelf of the high cupboard. I glanced up to see a few things sat there, his eyes were trained on one but I couldn't see what it was. Whatever he needed was up there, Sam would be able to reach it but he was taller than Paul. Sam was easily 6'4 but Paul was more 5'9, 6'0 ft at most. He wouldn't fit on the slim counter top to kneel and get it and a chair would break, the thoughts hit me as his eyes trailed over the kitchen looking for something to use. Nothing was there though.

"I'll get it" I piped up and internally kicked myself, I hadn't meant to say that but something in me wanted to help, wanted him to not be so angry with me. He glanced down at me but said nothing, just watched as I lifted myself onto the small counter top and stood up, my head at this height nearly hit the ceiling but I could see clearly onto the top shelf. These cupboards were far too high, Emily wouldn't stand a chance. Not that the things on the shelf were food items, I could see string, a small wooden box, a hammer and a screwdriver surrounded by little screws. Sam's man shelf obviously. "What did you need?" I glanced back down at Paul, his eyes weren't on my face but travelling over my body, a deep frown settled on his face while his jaw stayed clenched tightly shut.

His head jerked upwards as I spoke, his frown softening as he met my stare, my skin began flushing again, a blush rose in my cheeks. He was looking at me; his eyes had scanned over my body. Probably in disgust.

"String" He barked out but shut his eyes slowly, his mouth opening a little so he could let out a long breath. "Please, the ball of string"

I nearly fell backwards from surprise, he did have manners and he didn't bark at me as he spoke. He spoke normally, softly. I nodded and turned to get it for him, there was no way he would have fit on the countertop. He would have fallen by now. I grabbed at the string and dropped myself down to my knees before finally lowering myself to the floor, as I turned around I saw Paul's arms outstretched as if ready to catch me, his eyes a little wide with worry. An emotion I never thought I would see in his angry eyes.

"Here" I handed the ball out for him to take and he jerked his head to the side, the worry that had played his dark eyes quickly vanished replaced with their usual anger and annoyance, his outstretched hands made a move for the ball in mine, he was back to being angry obviously. His hand was huge, as was the rest of him, but his hand was big and thick. I felt his rough skin brush over my soft skin, a slight scratching sensation tingled over my palm and a wave of heat flowed from his scorching skin and as quick as the sensation came it went as he snatched the string and his hand away from me. It was like I had given him an electric shock but it was him that gave me one.

He made a step away from me, his movements so sudden my own body jolted from him. I didn't feel comfortable around him, I was on edge all the time and my body was clenched in an unexplainable wave of fear. He didn't feel safe to be around, he was mean. I was just waiting for him to make a comment but the comments never came, he wasn't outwardly nasty but his actions toward me were and I didn't like it.

The air was filled with a torturous tension, it was silent and awkward and I wanted him to just leave but he didn't move. He was staring at me with a look of both hatred and interest, I had never been looked at in this way before; normally people were either mean or friendly, no in between. But he was in between; he hated me obviously but as he stood in front of me watching me there was something else, a something else I didn't care for him to have. I didn't want to be involved with someone as arrogant and unkind as Paul, but at the same time he was intriguing in a way. I found myself wanting to ask his story, ask what his life has been like, what his parents do, why he is the way he is but it wasn't my business, nor would he tell me if I asked.

He finally dropped his stare from mine to look at the ball of string in his hands, he held it up as if in silent thanks but no words left his lips. I guess he was far to superior than me to say thank you.

I fell back against the kitchen counter as he pushed himself past me and began to leave but he stopped and I quickly saw why. Kim and Emily were stood by the door just staring at the two of us, confused and somewhat surprised expressions on their faces. I wasn't sure how long they had been there, I wasn't sure of anything happening since Paul entered the room, he stole my attention and for the life of me I couldn't understand why. His presence sucked me in and I hated the feeling of it.

Paul turned back to me, his eyes softer than they had been toward me earlier yet wary. My phone began buzzing beside me but I didn't look, he however did. As his eyes fell on the screen he instantly became angry again, his vibrations came back and any softness his eyes held were replaced by his earlier anger, fury. His fists clenched again and he gave me one last nasty look before walking harshly from the kitchen, he didn't even stop to say bye to Emily or Kim he just shoved himself out of the door slamming it as he went.

Emily and Kim stared at the door while my eyes travelled down to my phone, Kyle. But I didn't answer it; I was too cold, too deflated, and too sad again. Paul really was unnecessarily unkind, I didn't care what Emily said earlier. There was no way Paul had a big heart or cared for anyone, he was too much of an ass, a beautiful, intriguing ass that seemed to suck me in no matter how hard I tried not to be.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you for the reviews people, you are very kind. Sorry for the delay in posting, I'm so lazy, I write the chapter and then I just don't post it! My bad, I will improve I promise. **

**Could you all give some ideas on where this story could go? What would you like to see happen? I feel like it's a little repetitive just going through the motions with them! Thank you :D**

_**There's a whole 'nother conversation going on, in a parallel universe**_

_**When nothing breaks and nothing hurts.**_

_**There's a waltz playin' frozen in time**_

_**Blades of grass on tiny bare feet**_

_**I look and you and you're looking at me**_

**Beam me up – Pink**

* * *

**Paul point of view**

I gave a wolf call as I approached Jared's house, I needed food and this place was the closest of pack houses to my patrol post. Normally I would go to Sam and Emily's but I didn't want to, it didn't feel as comfortable as it once did. Not now she was there. Not now all I could smell was her; all I could hear was her heartbeat. It wasn't the home it once felt like, it had been invaded by a short little girl that I didn't seem able to escape from.

I shook my head desperate to get rid of the face now filling it as I pushed my way into Jared's house, the scent of my pack brother filled me as did the scent of Kim, his imprint. She was here, but then she always was. I walked in unannounced to the kitchen; Kim was sat on the counter while Jared hovered over the stove. Both of them looked up as I walked in but neither said anything. Jared had heard me wolf call, Kim however looked slightly startled by my appearance.

"Patrol ok?" Jared mumbled but didn't turn around as he continued stirring at whatever was in the stove; he never cooked for himself or for anyone other than Kim. For Kim he turned into a soft little good boy who never stepped out of line and did everything she wanted, he was whipped and it made me sick sometimes, however it was slightly amusing watching a big guy like himself be controlled by a tiny girl like Kim. All the imprinted guys were like it.

"Mmm, Quil took over early so that I would do his night shift later, he doesn't want to miss Claire's bedtime or something stupid like that" I grunted back and leant back in my chair, balancing on the two back legs of the chair that creaked under my weight.

"I think it's sweet" Kim piped up quietly, she never spoke much. She never shut up to Jared or Emily but she never spoke around me or the guys, she was like a little mouse. I gave a little laugh as she spoke and shook my head, it wasn't sweet it was sick. He was tied to a little kid his whole life, unable to move on or even date, just sitting around waiting for her to hit her teen years.

"Ignore him Kim, he just has his panties in a twist because he doesn't stand a chance with his imprint" Jared looked up giving a smug smirk as he spoke the words that made my stomach twist. She wasn't mine, she never would be.

"Shut it Jared" I growled slamming the chair back to his kitchen floor and he started chuckling while shaking his head.

"Sure sure, but remember man, while you're over here avoiding her the other guys are other there cosying up to her" He shrugged cockily and I knew he was teasing but I growled at him anyway, my body began buzzing with anger at his words. He could be such an asshole. "Nothing's stopping them from making a move, she's young, pretty, single and as far as the pack know, she's not an imprint. Tick, tock, tick tock" He started teasing again and I went to rise from my seat but Kim beat me to it by smacking his shoulder, it was lightly but it made him stop. He sure was whipped, his smug grin wiped off his face and he gave her an apologetic look.

Lowering myself back down to my chair I tried controlling my growling, I didn't want her to bother me so much but she did. I couldn't do anything because of her. I couldn't patrol properly, I couldn't concentrate, I couldn't stop being angry for more than five minutes and I couldn't freaking be near Rachel without feeling sick. All because of a kid who didn't belong here, a stupid little rich girl from the city who had been here less than a week and already had the pack boys wrapped around her finger. They all went on about how nice she was, how cool she seemed, how pretty she was. Sam was the worst, always blowing off about how fucking amazing she is at dance. Screw her. I didn't need some little girl trying to control me, change me. I wouldn't change for anyone; I had already changed enough of my life for this wolf shit.

"So I heard you were with her last night, apparently it looked like you were being nice for a minute" Jared went on and I let a scowl cover my face.

"Apparently the woman in this place can't keep their mouths shut" I glanced at Kim who flinched under my stare, Jared missed it as he turned the stove off and emptied the contents of a saucepan into three bowls. I didn't dislike Kim, she was a nice girl, a pack member but damn she and Emily could gossip. "I went to get string not to see her, and I wasn't being nice" I grunted as he slid a bowl of soup across to me and he and Kim sat opposite. Kim shuffled uneasily in her seat, not touching her soup but simply staring at the table. It was as if she had something to say but not the balls to say it.

"But you knew she would be there, you could have got string from Billy's, and you were closer to his house than Sams. Dude, I think you forget I know how this works" I looked up at my brother, his hand was signally between him and Kim and I scoffed at the action. "Oh here we go, tell us the difference with you. Humour me please"

"Nothing like this" I signalled like he had between the two of them. "Is going to happen with me, she's just a kid who isn't going to be here for long. I'm not interested in her or being a whipped little boy like you, so like I said earlier shut it. I'm not interested and neither is she" I stopped and lowered my eyes to the soup I had pushed away, I wasn't hungry anymore. "She has a boyfriend back home, the place she belongs"

"Woah woah woah is that jealousy Mr Lahote? So what if she has a boyfriend, he doesn't stand a chance now not against the hot stud muffin that is Paul Lahote. Get your head out of your ass bro" Jared was chuckling as he ripped at his bread roll and gulped it down between words. Kim still hadn't lifted her stare from the table, she was biting her lip like she was dying to say something but she was holding it in. "Any hope you'll tell the guys soon? It's killing me having to keep it quiet, and I want to see the shit storm it kicks up when Sam finds out" I had enough, I couldn't handle him. I would have had more peace going to Leah's house.

I kicked myself up and shoved my chair away; Kim finally glanced up as Jared started smiling proudly to himself that he had managed to piss me off. "There's not going to be a shit storm Jared because Sam is not going to find out. I am not interested, I don't want her. I would be quite happy if I didn't see her again, ever. So leave it and stop being so annoying." Slamming the chair back under the table I walked out but his little cough stopped me.

"Good luck with that"

"With what?" I sighed as I stopped in the hallway.

"Not seeing her, pack meeting tonight and Kim said she's coming. Sam wants her to be aware of the legends in case she finds out. So good luck with staying away from her and not telling Sam, I can't wait to witness that shit storm when it happens, because it will happen. Trust me." He started laughing and my body shook with anger, I hated him. I hated this situation, I hated Sam, I hated Jared and I hated Savannah. She was ruining everything and she had been here two days. She didn't need to know the legends, she was an outsider, she wasn't a tribe member and she had no right to know about us. She couldn't be trusted, she is a child.

"I am never coming here for lunch again, screw you Jared" I growled as I left making sure I slammed the front door as I went. His mom was pulling up as I stormed down the path but I didn't stop to acknowledge her. I was too angry, too confused and mind screwed, all because of a little 18 year old girl. She was going to destroy everything if I let her, I wouldn't let her. I would ignore her, she would leave and life would go back to normal. I didn't want her.

* * *

...

**Savannah point of view **

I clutched at my stomach as the cramp began, I couldn't breathe properly and my stomach was in painful stitches all because of Seth, he is hilarious. He is so young and sweet, slightly annoying but it added to his overall charm.

"He's telling you the frog story isn't he?" Embry asked as he sat himself down alongside me and I nodded as I tried cooling my laughter.

"Don't listen to him Savannah, its all lies" A new voice joined in and I glanced up to see Quil skidding himself down in the earth and halting beside me. He gave a cheeky wink before throwing a handful of grass at his friend.

"So you didn't really scream like a girl because you saw a frog?" I questioned and the boy beside me's cheeks flushed while he shook his head, he was so lying.

"A big hunk like me scared of a toad? No way, it was your bother that screamed like a little girl. Guys a total wimp" Quil shrugged, his face still flushing as he tried smiling smoothly at me. I glanced over to where Sam was; he was watching us and shook his head at me while mouthing something I couldn't understand.

"And this guys a total liar" Embry was laughing now as he ribbed his friend. "Whatever Seth said was the truth, Quil saw it and was a mile down the road before Claire had even screamed the word frog" His laughter got harder and my own laughter came back. Seth had been telling me that a few of the guys had taken Nessie, the little girl I met the other night and a girl called Claire who I didn't know yet, to explore and Claire had found a frog, she had held it up to Quil but before she could even say what it was he had screamed and ran away with his hands waving in the air. The shock of his scream had made Claire drop it and it went jumping after him, apparently the guys found him sat in a tree half hour later. The way Seth had told the story had me in tears from laughter.

I felt Quil reaching behind me to hit Embry, his arm hit my back rather than his friends and I mumbled 'oww' through my laughs, it hadn't hurt but it was instinct to say 'oww'.

"What the hell is that for, asshole" Quil whined and I looked up to see Paul towering over us, his glare directly on Quil and his hand outstretched. He had just hit Quil. Why would he do that? Because he hit me by accident? Why would Paul care? When did Paul even get here?

He hadn't been here the last time my eyes swept the area of the yard Sam had set up with a bonfire and blankets. We were outside Sam's house, apparently they were having a tribal legend night; they do it quite often according to Emily. It's where a tribal elder tells old stories, it sounded nice and the last half hour had been fairly enjoyable but as I looked up at Paul my earlier feelings of amusement and comfort vanished, the atmosphere changed and the tension built back up. Silent and awkward. His glare shifted from Quil to me and any shadow of a smile faded all heat in my body left and snapped my head down to my lap. I hated the feeling he gave me, it was like I suddenly felt self conscious and not good enough. It was ridiculous that a man I didn't know made me feel so desperate and pathetic; it should be him that felt pathetic, pathetic for making a teenage girl frightened.

"QUIL QUIL QUIL QUIL" A little scream broke through the heated silence and I felt the boy next to me rise, Quil was moving away and I felt unsafe again, Paul had a direct path to me but his feet didn't move. My eyes were trained on his feet, praying they didn't move and they didn't. It felt like forever that they stayed rooted there, each second that past sent painful thuds crashing in my chest and I couldn't focus on what was around me. I could feel his angered glare on my back, it was burning me. I couldn't see him but I knew it wasn't a nice stare.

"That's Claire" Embry suddenly spoke breaking the somewhat strained atmosphere around us, his throat giving a cough as he cleared it and I looked up at him. He was frowning not at me but at Paul, but his eyes quickly found mine again and gave a little smile, a kind smile. "Emily's niece, she's three and obsessed with Quil" He nodded to his right and I looked up to see Quil swinging a little girl around in the air, Emily was stood behind them smiling. She had left about an hour ago but I didn't know why, obviously she was picking the girl up. Her giggles were filling the silence and I could see a happy smile playing Embry's face as he too watched his friend and the child.

"Does she live near here?" I asked trying desperately to ignore the padding off feet on the ground behind me, Paul was leaving. Embry's eyes flashed up above my head, his forehead creasing in a frown again as he watched Paul leave but he quickly shook his head and softened his boyish features.

"No, she lives on the Makah Res" He stopped and studied me; I had no idea where that was. "It's another Native American reservation just down the coast line; Emily is from there originally and so is my mom. Emily brings Claire here for things like this because she loves the stories and she gets to play with Nessie who should be coming with Jacob soon, and so she can see Quil obviously" He gave another fond smile and turned back to his friend who I saw was now dangling Claire upside down behind his back whilst looking around for her, pretending he couldn't see her. The girl was in fits of laughter while Emily scolded him about giving her a head rush.

"He's good with her" I couldn't help but smile as I watched them together, he lowered her to the ground and she began trying to pick him up by his ankle, obviously she wasn't getting very far.

Embry nodded. "He adores her, she's a sweet kid. She will probably annoy you all night, she loves new people" He rolled his eyes a little as if it was a pain that she would do that but I sensed that he didn't mind, I didn't know Embry well but he seemed rather laid back, I don't think an annoying kid would bother him that much. I on the other hand, was no good with children. I had never been around them, nor had I ever wanted to be. Even at dance the younger groups pissed me off during shows, all they had to do was walk on stage and be a damned flower but they got that wrong. I was not a child friendly person.

"NESSIE NESSIE" A screech called out again and I looked back up at Quil to see Claire running from him and toward the trees that surround the little house; Jake was walking out of them followed by a girl. The same girl as two days ago, she was a beautiful little thing. I wasn't sure how old she was, she was immaculate and pretty, her hair tied back into a perfect bun while her clothes held no dirt like Claire's did, she looked like a child model. Her lips were perfectly rose coloured, her pale skin holding a natural blush to her cheeks and her eyes a beautiful shade of brown and gold's. She wasn't like any other snot nosed child I had seen before, she was older than Claire but she wasn't over the age of 8. The chubby body of Claire went flying at Nessie but the girl barely moved, she stood deadly still as Claire barged into her small legs. I would have gone flying if the three year old had done that to me, Nessie was freaking me out slightly. She was far too perfect for a kid, when I was her age I ran around with wonky bunches in my hair, missing teeth and mud smeared over my already torn clothes.

"Don't think about it too hard" A soft voice whispered from beside me and I realised Quil's previous position on the floor beside me had been filled, Kim was sat beside me smiling as she watched Nessie run off after Claire. "How pristine she is, she's like seven and looks better than I do when I try" She spoke a little louder now, a smile creeping on her face as she offered me a bottle of water. Embry and Seth were in a conversation about football, they hadn't even noticed Kim arrive I don't think. I had spent last night with Kim, a girl's night as Emily had called it. It had actually be quite nice, Kim was shy but kind, once she got comfortable with someone she talked a lot but I could see instantly she was shyer around this group of guys.

I had learnt a lot about her; she would be in my class at school and had dated Jared for a year now. She had had a crush on him for forever but he only noticed her a couple months before he graduated. Teenage love story, I had zoned out on most of it but from what I gathered she was Jared obsessed, she had blushed as she talked about him. She lived near the school with her parents, little sister who was 6 and her little brother; he was 10 and an annoying little brat apparently. Most kids were in my eyes.

"Thanks" I signalled to the water and she shook her head before sighing and leaning forward so she was hunched over a little. She was swamped in a hoody that was obviously Jared's, it was huge on her.

"How has your day been? Have you done much?" She still spoke quietly; I don't think she could speak any louder than a whisper. She was very soft spoken, polite and full of manners. I couldn't put her with a guy like Jared, he was nice don't get me wrong but he was loud, cheeky and playful, he had gotten into a belching contest with Brady ten minutes ago. He was the opposite of Kim, but I guess opposites attract so who was I to judge?

"Ok I guess, I stayed here and sorted my things out a bit more, a friend from home rang me but I couldn't talk to him for long. How about yours?" I sipped on my water as she shrugged.

"Had lunch with Jared, Paul came by but didn't stay long. Other than that nothing, are you missing home? I don't think I could last even two days away from here" My stomach flipped as she spoke, my head darted around and I found his eyes staring at me. He was stood beside Sam, a can of soda clenched in his hands as he stared intensely to where I was sat. I couldn't decipher his emotion, whether it was anger or interest I didn't know but his eyes didn't sway from mine. It was as if he was waiting for me to reply, he couldn't hear me, he was too far away but he was waiting. "Savannah?" Kim spoke again and I dropped the stare of the guy across the yard, heat flooded my face and neck, my stomach sloshed around uncomfortably as I turned back to her and clenched harder at my water bottle which crushed under my grip.

"Uhh yeah, yeah I guess I do. I umm, I miss my friends more than anything else. I wasn't a big fan of living in a city" My voice wavered a little as I tried regaining my composure, Kim was staring at me, interest sparkling in her eyes as she waited for me to go on.

"Did you live actually in the city then?" She hadn't asked questions last night, she had almost steered clear of any discussion about my home but tonight she seemed somewhat more comfortable with me.

"No, well kind of. We lived just outside of the main city but my school was in the city, as was my dance school and my mom's job. But I can't stand the noise and the crowds." I could feel him staring at me still, his stare burning but not in the painful way it had earlier. I don't think he was angry with me, but I barely knew the guy so he could be. I stole a quick glance behind me, his hard face had softened and he was simply watching me, no frown of clenched jaw, he was just watching. Maybe he didn't hate me; maybe he was just a serious person.

"No I don't think I would either, but like you said, I guess you miss your friends. At least you've spoken to them though, that's cool that you can keep in touch" She offered me a smile as I turned my attention back to her and I nodded, I became aware of the phone in my pocket and I pulled it out. Insinct I suppose, pressing the screen on a picture of me, Kyle and Kerry all smiling flashed on. "Is that them?" Kim noticed the phone and I nodded.

"Yeah, that's Kerry, we met in dance when we were kids and that's Kyle" Her smile grew and she nodded as I pointed to each person in the happy picture, it had been taken a few months before my mom died. Kerry and Kyle were my only real friends, I had people I knew in school and at dance but I didn't trust or like them like I did Kerry and Kyle. I guess I wasn't that great at making new friends either, I had always found it hard trusting people, a trait I got from my mother. After Josh broke her heart she never let anyone in, letting people in led to heart ache and I learnt from a young age that heart ache led to heart break and heart break led to loneliness and unhappiness, my mom had always been lonely whether she thought I noticed or not. One mistake with her heart left her alone and pregnant, I never wanted to make that mistake.

There was a sound behind me, an angry sound. The vibrations of it made not only Kim look around but Seth and Embry who up until this point had still been in a deep conversation about things I knew nothing about, I followed their gazes but I didn't really need to. I knew that sound and where it came from, Paul. It was the animalistic growl he had let out before, his interested stare had turned hard again, the same look crossed his annoyed face as yesterday, when he had stormed out after my phone rang in the kitchen. He was glaring at me, Jared was at his side a slight smirk playing on his face as he watched the guy before him stare me down but he seemed to notice that Kim and I had turned and Jared started hitting Paul's arm and pulling him around so that he wasn't facing us anymore, it took a bit of effort but after a few attempts he succeeded. Sam had gone, I couldn't see Sam. Whenever Paul's anger lurked, Sam seemed to disappear. I could see Jared mumbling to Paul but I couldn't make out the words leaving his lips, Kim started tugging on my sleeve, grabbing my own attention and I turned around to see her giving me a false smile.

"Just ignore him, he gets moody over the littlest things" She was quick to say, her voice quivered as she spoke and I couldn't believe them. He didn't get moody over the littlest things, he got moody over me. It always seemed aimed at me.

My eyes glanced up, Embry and Seth had gone back to their discussion but my eyes soon found Emily. She was stood behind Seth, her eyes darting between Paul and I before settling on Kim, she seemed to make a wide eye jolt, like they were having a silent conversation that Kim nodded too. As she nodded I noticed Emily's face go pale and she hand to place her hand on Seth's head to steady herself. Something was going on, I had no idea what but something was going on and it involved Paul and I think maybe me.

He spent the night staring at me, Jared was sat beside him as if Paul were a dog on a leash, he wasn't allowed to go get a drink without Jared following whereas Kim stayed rooted beside me, Emily had wondered off at one point and had emerged from the house with a large glass of what looked like wine, Sam had by this point gone rushing to her as if something was wrong but she had waved him off. I got the idea from the weird stares the other guys gave her that she didn't drink often, she looked like she was about to freak out as she sipped the wine down as if it were water.

I managed to make it to the stories before Claire noticed my presence, as Kim ushered me to sit beside her around a small fire the little chubby three year old had come running over to us, a huge toothy grin on her face. It was dark now; the only light illuminating the circle of people was from the small fire Jake had made.

"Who are you?" Claire bobbed around in front of me; her constant movements making me feel dizzy. Her hair was in long ringlet curls, her cheeks rosy and chubby and her body short and equally as chubby. She was in jeans and a hoody, her hair was originally in a ponytail but her running had caused it to fall messily around her face, she was a cute kid. Nessie was beautiful whereas Claire was cute and round and smiley.

"Savannah" I didn't do children, I never knew how to talk to them or act with them. My eyes darted to whoever I could find, none of them paying any attention except Paul, he was the only guy here watching me and I could tell from the frown he held that he wouldn't be saving me from the over hyper three year old.

"Savannah is Sam's little sister Claire" Kim finally spoke next to me and my body let out a long sigh, she could deal with the kid while I tried not to feel the painful burns Paul was causing as she stared at me.

The girl frowned now, one hand coming up to rest on her hip as she scanned me with her big brown eyes. She was an adorable child I suppose, less freaky than the Nessie girl; she was more normal and imperfect. "But I don't know you?" She questioned and her little frown deepened.

"She just moved here, she used to live somewhere else and now she lives with Sam. Why don't you go find Nessie?" Kim leant forward and tickled the girls belly which caused a brief round of giggles that quickly stopped as she settled her interest on me again.

"Nessie is hiding from Jacob; Quil won't play with me because he's helping Grandpa Quil. Where did you live before?" She sighed as she spoke the information and I glanced up behind her, down the muddy drive I could see Quil and Jacob pushing two men in wheelchairs toward us, two women following them. I couldn't see any of their faces though, just their silhouettes.

"Chicago, it's a really big city" I answered before Kim and the girl in front of me nodded before pouting her lips.

"Bigger than La Push?" She asked and I simply nodded, far bigger than La Push. "Hmm does your mommy and daddy live here too?" My stomach did a painful jolt, it was an innocent question asked by an innocent child but it killed, not the dad part, I was over my daddy issues but the mommy part. I wish she was here, she would love it here. She loves scenic places.

"Claire, that's enough. Come with me and get some ice cream" A gruff voice spoke softly, I knew the voice but the tone that went with it was foreign to me. The voice belonged to Paul but the tone belonged to someone else, it was too kind and caring to be him but as I looked up it was him. He stopped behind Claire and his body crouched down so he was more level with her. She turned to him and huffed before turning back to me.

"Paul wants ice cream, I better go take him before he gets grumpy" She rolled her eyes and held her hand out for the large man beside her to take, he had a smile on his face. A real smile that he had never had whilst looking at me, he was looking at her. This little girl made him smile whereas I made him glare and growl. She leant up to his ear and held a hand to her mouth as if wanting to whisper. "She's really pretty, isn't she Paul?" Her whisper was more of a shout and the heat flooded my cheeks as his eyes danced across to mine, moving across my face, his smile faltered but the anger didn't reappear.

He just looked at me; really looked, taking every part of me into his stare and my stomach began dropping in butterflies and anticipation. I was waiting for the drop, waiting for the comment that would bring the asshole back, the horrible stare or comment that would kill this buzzing feeling running through my body but it didn't come. Instead he nodded at the girl and her little chubby cheeks crunched up into a wide smile. My own cheeks darkened again, he hadn't been horrible, and he had nodded. I wasn't sure why that simple gesture mattered to me but it felt like a breakthrough. He was being decent, even if it lasted a second, he was being decent.

"Come on Claire" He pulled at her little hand and stood back up, his body bent down and swooped her up so she was hanging over his shoulder and he began to walk away, he didn't look at me again but she was. Claire was waving and smiling at me as he marched her into the house.

...

The two guys in the wheelchair weren't guys, they were men. Older men, one older than the other but both older than the guys that surrounded me, one was called Billy, he was Jacobs dad while the other was old Quil, Quil's grandfather. Billy had told the stories, legends that my mother had never been able to tell me about the tribe I supposedly came from. They were about wolves, someone called Taha Aki and how the Quileute's were descendants of wolves. I had lost focus after a certain point, he mentioned the cold ones but I heard nothing else after that. Mainly because there was a round of growls around me, like the angry growls Paul let out except as Billy mentioned the cold ones every guy in the circle did it and I zoned out of the stories. My eyes fell onto Paul, he hadn't been staring at me he was sat beside Quil who was holding Claire. Paul was holding a bowl of ice cream out for the girl and she kept dropping her spoonfuls on his foot.

I watched him for five minutes, he was smiling and laughing at the toddler as she quickly turned the accidental dropping of ice cream into game and kept flicking it at him. He looked happy, genuinely happy as he interacted with her and Quil. A side of Paul I had never witnessed, I caught a glimpse of the big hearted man Emily had described, but it had been brief. His eyes flickered across the fire to where I sat, he saw me looking and the smile on his face fell instantly, replaced by a wary annoyance, a dislike.

A look so different to the one he had given me not long before as he nodded at Claire when she mentioned that I was pretty, that one had been a nice look but this one was horrible. This one was the Paul I knew not the Paul that Emily described. This was the Paul I didn't like. My chest stung as I watched him snap his eyes away, a deep frown sitting on his forehead as he tried focusing on Billy but he couldn't, he turned back to me the glare that sat there darkened, he looked full of hate.

My whole body ached and I found myself cowering back against the log Kim and I were sat against, my body cold and hurting. He was giving me whiplash, one minute he was somewhat decent and the next he hated me again. I didn't know the guy yet he was twisting and turning my body and mind, it was hurting me to know that I guy I didn't know could hate me so much, it made me feel pathetic that he made me care so much. I normally couldn't give a damn what people thought but this was different, this was a deeper dislike, he had a reason, he must have a reason to hate someone he doesn't know so much. I needed to get away from him; he was sucking everything from me. Being around him exhausted me, it physically made me ache. I needed to get away, he was dangerous, he was unsafe and mean.

"You ok?" Kim whispered beside me and I realised I had shuffled forward ready to stand. I nodded and tried to smile but I couldn't, I felt sick.

"I just need fresh air" I spoke the lie before thinking and Kim frowned at me more, her eyes darting around the air space surrounding us.

"We are outside Savannah" She whispered quieter and my eyes danced around the people near me, Embry had glanced over, he seemed amused by my choice of lie and was silently chuckling whereas Jared who was now sat beside Kim looked genuinely concerned as he watched me, I felt faint and I knew I was probably pale. It was Sam's look which caught me, he was sat beside Jacob and Nessie, Emily was leant against his body and he was holding her, both of them were watching me however Sam's eyes darted to Paul then back at me, he looked confused yet angry. I didn't like the angry look, I had experience too much anger since being here.

"Right, I umm have a head ache I need a painkiller" I heaved myself up before she had a chance to say anything and stepped over the log, a few people glanced up at me as I walked toward the house but I ignored them. Sam seemed to reach out but pulled his arm back in as if deciding against getting involved and I jumped up the front porch and into the warm house. My skin tingled as the heated air hit me, I hadn't realised how cold it was outside until now but I started shivering as I walked toward the stairs. I didn't want to go back out, I would have to though. It would be rude not to. But then did I care? Paul was rude, he didn't get told off for it, why couldn't I be rude for once and just not go back out?

_Because I wasn't a rude person. _

I walked up to my room, my body shivering as I went. I was in skinny jeans and a jacket but I needed more, I could use that as a genuine excuse. I was cold, I didn't have freakishly warm bodies like the guys sat out there in shorts and t-shirts, they were dressed for summer when in actual fact it was the beginning of December.

I paced around my room as I tried calming myself down, the pain still ached within my chest. The whiplash Paul was giving me was hurting like hell but I had to forget about it. He was nothing to me, he never would be. He was just someone I knew, Sam's friend not mine. He didn't matter to me. Yet the pain was telling me otherwise.


	9. Chapter 9

**So sorry for the wait! I won't go on making excuses, life is hectic at times and this month has been one of those months. Hope you are all still reading, please give me any ideas you may have :D where should it go? Should she find out about the wolves now?**

* * *

I had been here a week, a long week that had been full of different people and stories of those people, I witnessed strong bonds of family and friendship that was so foreign to what I knew it scared me whilst at the same time stirred an envy, an envy that although I was close to my mom, I never had people around me like Sam had around him. There were people at the house at all hours of the day, not a day had gone by where breakfast wasn't overcrowded by young boys or where lunch didn't consist of a food fight or war of words between friends. It was strange, uncomfortable at times but at the same time, it seemed completely normal. I had found myself often laughing along as the guys joked with one another, or rolling my eyes as Emily launched into a rant at one of them for getting food on the floor.

But there was still one problem, him. No matter how the others made me feel welcomed, however much they made me laugh or made me feel ok sitting amongst them, something always led me back to him. Conversations would bring him up, jokes would be made about him, or occasionally, very occasionally he would turn up. Since the bonfire I had seen him four times, four times in seven days and those four times were short and awkward, full of angry stares or empty niceties. He had a major stick up his ass and I had no idea why but it bugged me, more than it should.

Each time I thought about him my body reacted, my heart would jump painfully, my stomach would tighten un-willingly and I would shake with a mixture of anger and interest. The simply thought of him in this very moment was enough to stir the emotions that I felt stupid for feeling, I shouldn't care yet he was such an asshole and so unneccasirly angry and unkind that I couldn't help it. He had a story, of that I was certain. A story to him that I wanted to know, I wanted to know what had happened to turn a young man into such an ass, he interested me but that is where it stopped. He angered me and interested me, nothing more.

Eurgh.

I hated that every day my brain lingered too long on him, Paul. I hated him and the way he sucked all attention to him when he lingered around me, how my body stopped in his presence, how he demanded every ounce of attention. I was being an ass; I was focusing on things that didn't matter, on people who didn't matter. I was going stir crazy, being stuck in these four walls with these big guys I didn't really know was driving me to near insanity and so I took the decision to get out. I used to be active and fit, I didn't work out but I danced and sometimes ran, it seemed the only liable excuse to use in an attempt to escape the un-peaceful Red Riding Hood cottage I found myself now calling home.

I tied my hair into a high tight pony; it wouldn't slip out of place as I ran. My scalp ached from the tight sensation I hadn't felt pulling in a while but I shook it off. My eyes met my own face as I looked up into the bathroom mirror, I had applied little make up, I was never one for dolling myself up but I wore the necessities so that I could avoid looking death like every day. My green eyes shone out against my lightly tanned skin, I liked my eyes, they were my mother's eyes. The green eyes scanned down over my outfit, grey workout pants that came to my knee and a lazily cut sweater that hung loosely from my shoulders. I would normally wear a t-shirt but it was grey and cold out so a sweater would do. I pulled my Ipod out and tucked it into my bra before placing one head phone in and turning for the door, my trainers padding heavily against the uneven flooring of the small house that creaked as I walked for the stairs, the creaking was drowned out by the conversations beneath me. I could hear a flurry of voices, all young yet all rough and harsh as if they had lived past their teen years.

"Nessie is wierd though"

"She is not weird, she's unique"

The two voices practically shouted as I reached halfway down the stairs, my feet coming into view to whoever was in the kitchen. Nessie, she was the little girl who hung off Jacob, the eight year old who was freakishly good looking.

"Unique then, either way she gives me the creeps she is like not even two yet she looks"

"Shut up"

The younger voice was cut out by the bark of my brother, I hovered for a second as I thought over the words he had interrupted, Nessie wasn't two she was easily seven if not older.

"Savannah, good morning honey" Emily spoke out now as I peered over the breakfast table that was full already, it was only 8:30am yet they were here and already stuffing their faces. Before I acknowledged anybody I scanned for him, my heart sinking in relief and slight dashed hopes as I saw he wasn't here. I got hopeful when he turned up, hopeful that it would be different and he would be nice but it never was. Instead the table was full with Seth, Embry, Jacob and Sam. All of whom were grinning widely at me while Seth looked like he was being pinched under the table by Sam, tears were springing to his young eyes while Sam leant strangely close to him. It had been him to mention Nessie, the recognition of his voice hit me as I saw his face.

"Morning" I finally returned to Emily as she hovered by the telephone table, her hand hovering over the receiver as if she had just put it down.

She smiled genuinely at me, tucked in her arm was an oven glove, across her top lay a smear of flour and I smelt her baking, the woman was forever baking. It was a wonder I hadn't gained two dress sizes since being here. "I just spoke with Kim, she has a day off school today for a dentist appointment. I thought we could meet her after and have some lunch or I could show you the town, you haven't seen much of it thanks to the rain" She stopped talking and scanned over my body, as if realising I wasn't in my pyjamas as I was most mornings. "Are you going somewhere?" Her perfectly plucked brows knitted together as she lingered on my feet. I pointed toward the door as I opened my mouth to speak.

"Yeah, just for a run. I have been real lazy recently, and I could do with the air. Is that ok?"

She nodded but her eyes fell on Sam, mine followed and I saw the grins of each boy and gone and instead they looked sort of confused as to what to do. Sam finally moved, offering me a small smile as he reached for another cup of coffee and nodded. "Of course, you don't need to ask" He shrugged as he poured the drink but the other three boys looked at him like he was crazy. "But can I just ask you something?" He spoke again realising their looks, I nodded but felt my own frown, why would he need to ask me something? Was this the diet thing Emily had warned me about? I wasn't running to lose weight I just liked to keep fit. I was about to tell him that but he beat me to it. "Can you stick to the footpaths, don't run off through the trees and try to stay close to the house. It gets pretty dense out there, you could get lost if you don't know the area and there can be other dangers and if you come across anyone just um you know the drill" As soon as he said it he looked away, as if signalling that was the end of the conversation.

I wanted to pry more but I didn't, I just nodded. "Stick to the paths, don't talk to strangers, keep you informed on where I am at all times and don't do anything stupid. I was drilled on safety rules since the day I could walk, but I'll actually follow them here. I won't be long" I tried lighting the sudden mood change, it had gone from easy and light to heavy and somewhat tense, but even my attempt at humour didn't change it. Seth grinned but Sam just nodded at me.

"Do you not want any food before you go?" Emily asked and I shook my head instantly, food before I ran made me puke. "Ok, well did you want to go and meet Kim?"

"Sure" I gave her the biggest smile I could before walking for the door, their chatter didn't start again until I reached the top step of the porch, Embry's loud voice echoed through the closed wooden door and it made me stop.

"You want me to go out after her?" After me? Like follow me? Did they think I was incapable of not getting lost? I felt sort of offended, I wasn't stupid.

"No, she'll be covered besides it's been quiet out recently, it's safe enough" Sam answered back and my frown furrowed further. I was covered? In what way was I covered? Like in clothing? Did he think I wasn't wearing enough? I don't get it. I wanted to stand and listen but a scraping of a chair made me jump and as I hopped down the steps the front door opened to Jacob shouting about having to go see Nessie, I skipped toward the tree line, giving him only a small smile as he walked past me to his old red car. The guys here were strange; things they did and said at times really confused me.

I had quickly got the impression safety was a main concern of theirs; I always overheard conversations about whether certain areas or places were 'covered' or 'secure'. I guess Emily had said they did security work around the res, so that could be the reason. Still, it was strange.

I walked until my feet found the trodden down path that ran through the lighter section of the trees. It wasn't a real foot path but it was more leading that other areas, it was clear of fallen branches or trees so I guess it was a path. My music suddenly became louder in my ear against the silence of the trees, only birds and wind offering noise against my thoughts.

Nick Mulvey was playing soothingly to me, his voice calming me down as I glanced around at my beautiful surroundings. This is what I loved; it was something I rarely got living so close to the city. Pure, untouched beauty, nature at its best, thick trees that held years of growth to them. As I breathed in the fresh air my feet began beating against the damp ground, my eyes still searching the scenery as I flew through the natural area of La Push.

I hadn't realised just how lost I had got myself in the music and the beauty of the moment until I hit grass, untouched grass that held no twigs or branches from towering trees, the trees were behind me. I was on something; I could hear waves and sea wind. My eyes looked directly ahead of me and I saw ocean, I was on the cliffs I had seen on my drive back here with Emily. The grey sky seemed to slip into the ocean perfectly, nothing not even colour differences separating the two as I walked closer to the edge. It was so high up, I couldn't get close to the edge because I heard the smash of waves beneath me and I froze. I wasn't that great with heights or the edges of cliffs, not that I had been on one before but I was suddenly nervous of being this close to the edge and I began backing off. I continued to back up until I was a safe distance and I fell into the damp grass, the coldness a welcoming feeling against my hot aching legs. I hadn't run that hard in months; my body was killing from it. I hadn't even realised I was running quite that fast or hard.

My music in my ear changed, Snoop Dogg Drop it like it's hot, came on. I laughed a little, a snort of laughter as the beat hit me. This song was my mom's favourite. She used to sing along as if she was a gangster, it made her feel so cool yet she always got the words wrong. My hand flew to the locket around my neck, my mom's locket. My fingers fiddled with the gold heart that was cold from the air that hit my warm body, my heart began hammering as the song flooded me with old memories. Car journeys I took for granted where she would blast the music out, times when I would come home from school and find her booty popping in the kitchen while she made dinner. She always said she was 'hip hop' cool but I joked it was her hips that would be popping if she carried on. A smile shadowed my face as I sat on the cliff top, my body sucking in the sharp fresh air. She would have loved it here, she never came here but I know she would have. She loved nature, she was forever going on about how one day she would make it on a mountain hike and take pictures of random rocks because they were artistic. I was certain she would have cried if she could see where I was sat, if she could see the ocean like I could right now, hear the waves hitting the rocks, watching the gulls swarm the sky. My mom was never a city person, she used to flip people off at any chance she got, beep her horn for no reasons other than her severe road rage. She overcrowded our small house with plants and pictures of places like this, but she never got to visit one.

My body shivered as I finally came from my trance, the song in my ear had changed a few times since the memories stirred and I was now listening to Ed Sheeran. It was getting colder, the sky was growing greyer and I suddenly became all too aware of the shivers crawling over my skin not from the cold but from the feeling someone was here. I felt like eyes were on me, a hot feeling was etching at me as it did on occasions where Paul was at the house, it was like I could feel that hot stare on me right now but it was absurd, I was alone.

I scanned around me, sure enough nothing was here. But the trees were growing darker, more sinister looking and I jumped to my feet dropping my hand from my locket. I should be back at the house by now; I had easily been two hours if not longer. The feeling of eyes on me never left as I walked through the tree line and found the path, my feet couldn't bring themselves to run anymore so I walked faster and faster toward the house, my eyes no longer searching the scenery but watching my feet as they moved. It was as if I were afraid to look around, afraid to see those eyes glaring at me even though I knew it was impossible anybody was out here, especially him.

As I walked fast I could see the gap that led to the yard, I was getting closer when a snap echoed around me and my head snapped up. I saw something flash to my right, as if someone ran past but as I looked closer I could see nobody there. I was being stupid.

"Stop being such a wimp, no one is there" I whispered to myself and continued to push on, my aching legs dying to feel the heat of a shower. I was being paranoid there was no one out here with me. I finally reached the opening to the yard, Sam was out there. He was leaning over the bonnet of his truck, shirt off and covered in oil. He glanced up as I walked in but he didn't linger on me, instead he stared past me into the trees I had emerged from. A frown covering his face as he concentrated on the empty trees.

"I umm managed not to get lost, I told you I was good at following rules" I quickly spoke trying to lighten the frown that held his face. It didn't work though, he was thinking hard about something but he finally looked at me and nodded.

"Yeah, looks like you have it covered" As soon as he spoke his eyes travelled back to the trees, he said nothing more neither did he make it open for me to so I took the hint and dragged myself up to the front door.

The house was empty for once; Emily was pottering around upstairs I could hear the floorboards creaking. I felt put off, both from the horrible sensation I felt on my run and the strange encounter with Sam. I was certain I could feel someone watching me, but no one was there. But then Sam, maybe he saw something. Or maybe he was just in a bad mood, not that I had done anything to upset him. Well, I had taken ages on my run when I said I would be an hour. Maybe I had annoyed him.

I worried too much, I cared too much. I groaned and walked for the stairs, slipping my shoes off as I walked into the guest room I pulled my jumper off, the cold air hitting my bare flesh as I stood in my bra and workout pants, this was heaven. I hated being too hot. It wasn't cold enough though, I skipped for the window and pushed it open, my eyes finding Sam again as I did so but I didn't just find him, he was with someone. Paul.

My body froze as I stood by the window, my heart leapt and thudded harshly as my eyes locked on his semi naked body. They looked like they were arguing; I couldn't hear what was being said but Sam looked livid, just as living as Paul. They were so angry. I watched in still silence as hands were thrown around and words bashed out, Sam backed off whereas Paul suddenly pointed up toward my bedroom window, his eyes following until he saw me stood there. Semi naked, his mouth stopped moving, his eyes widened and I watched him freeze as he took me in. I was in my bra. He could see me, more of me than he should be but he didn't look away. Instead it took Sam shoving him to make him finally tear his eyes from me. Sam hadn't noticed me there, or Paul looking, he simply pushed Paul toward the trees while saying something.

I didn't want Paul to leave but it looked like he was going to, with one finally glance at my window he turned and sulked back to the trees. His car wasn't here, had he been in the trees the whole time? Had he been out there with me? Maybe I wasn't crazy, maybe I was being watched, maybe by him? But why would be follow me? He hated me? It made no sense. It didn't add up.

He seriously clouded my mind; I lost all clarity when it came to him. I was sure that if we were to have a real conversation I would get so caught up I forgot my own name. But a real conversation would never happen, A, because he was an asshole and B, because I wanted nothing to do with him. I don't think anyway. I needed a shower, I needed to man up and stop obsessing over someone who didn't matter to me, I needed to get ready and go meet Kim, forget about Paul. It was as easy as that, I think.


	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry for the wait, again all I can do is apologise and hope you all understand how hectic life gets. I just forget how much time passes between updates. Please stick with the story and please please chuck ideas at me!**

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Time went quickly here, I wasn't sure whether it was because my days were kept so busy or simply because I wasn't so time conscious as I had been back home. In Chicago I was always watching the clock, catching buses to different dance practices most days or simply trying to get from school home, or in the last few months before and after my mom died, to work. Times had got harder, we were behind on rent this time last year and so I picked up a couple shifts a week at the diner my mom worked morning shifts at. You would think that being busy with school, dance and work would make the days fly by but it hadn't, the tick tock of the clock had gone painfully slow during those long days, but here they went as if it were nothing. Maybe it was because I found myself laughing, I didn't sit and dwell on the people I missed but I began enjoying the ones I had. I spent more time with Kim and Emily, then there was Seth. He was the sweetest kid I had ever met, at only fourteen he was a gentleman and he had me laughing until my stomach hurt some days.

I had been here nearly two weeks now, and although it was going quickly and easily, there was still one thing slowing my mind down, still one thing I lingered on for too long each day. Paul, no matter how hard I tried to ignore his ever growing presence on my mind he just kept appearing. He had been here only once since his fight with Sam, it seemed a little tense. Sam wasn't keen on talking about him and Paul didn't seem keen on his ten minute visit to be around Sam. It was almost like they were a pair of teenage girls in a fight, they went out of their way to ignore each other and it had got so awkward in the house that Emily kicked them both out. Paul left, Sam however sulked up to his bedroom mumbling about something strange happening. The ten minute visit had come with the same silent treatment toward me, Paul looked at me but he wasn't friendly, he didn't even say hi.

It was four days until Christmas, the 22nd of December and there was a tribal gathering at first beach, I wasn't sure whether that meant the entire Quileute tribe or just the guys who hung around here but Emily was baking like crazy while Kim and I were sat eating the cookies that had gone wrong, I was now on my tenth gingerbread elf, it was most definitely the best job.

"Girls, you are supposed to be decorating those ones, these are the bad batch" Emily screeched as Kim reached for another Santa hat shaped cookie.

"I knew they didn't taste burnt" I giggled as I finished off my good cookie and reached for the icing bag ready to decorate.

"You two have eaten nearly all of them" Emily groaned and Kim rolled her eyes at how dramatic the woman got over cookies.

"The guys will never notice they are burnt, can't we just give them those?" I pointed to what she called the bad batch and I was met with a look of disgust.

"The tribal elders will be there, Quil Senior will not eat burnt cookies"

"Yeah his teeth will fall out" Kim giggled as she squirted icing onto her gingerbread elf.

"Kimberly, stop that" Emily was smiling slightly but she tried sounding serious. She couldn't be mad at us for long.

"Hey you've given that one a penis" I pointed to the elf she just decorated and she giggled all over again.

"You better not be giving those elves penis's, so help me god I will kick you out of the kitchen" Emily scolded us from her place by the stove where she was making some sort of Christmas pie.

"Uhh do I want to know what you are doing in here?" A low voice came through the open front door and my body prickled in a heat I hadn't felt before, the tiny hairs all over my body stood on end and I thought back a tingling shiver.

"The girls are drawing icing penis's on the gingerbread" Emily huffed and I chuckled again.

"Actually it was Kim" I stopped as my eyes looked up and saw the owner of the low voice, Paul. His eyes found mine and the smile he had dancing in them faded to a blank stare that I still didn't seem prepared for. I dropped my head back down to the table and piped more icing on, trying desperately not to notice him in the room.

"Uhh well Sam said you needed me so" His low voice growled a little as he spoke, he sounded almost angry and although it was an intimidating sound my body shivered again.

"Oh yes, if you don't mind I need those chairs to be taken up for Quil and Sue, and also those two boxes of food. I will bring the rest up later with Kim and Jared" Paul moved and walked past me, there were quite a few chairs there and I half expected Emily to help but she didn't move. "If you take Savannah with you she can sort the food out, she knows what to do with it all and that way she can stop eating all the cookies"

"No" Paul was quick to respond, I hadn't even managed to look up before he said no. Granted, I was going to protest her idea but the harshness of his no made me flinch and my heart deflated within me. He really hated me. "I umm, she'll be squashed in the truck I have things in there" He pointed to the front door and I nodded with him trying to find my composure again.

"I can go with Jared"

"She can go with Jared" He copied me, his voice still angry and quick. Emily looked somewhat surprised by his reaction but simply shook her head.

"No she can't, Jared's car is full already, she can go with you" She repeated and my chest deflated again. I couldn't be alone with him, he might kill me. He physically shakes when he's around me.

"I'll take Kim, she can do it"

"You'll take Savannah, now hurry up please. Savannah those food boxes, you just need to cut some salad things there's a knife and a board in there and some cooked chicken, should be cooled by the time you get there" Emily listed off her instructions while I sat in place, Paul was rooted to his spot too. Neither of us was happy with this plan, him more so than me. "Guys, go on" She snapped as we both stared at her and Paul hurried out carrying the chairs while I grabbed the two boxes. "Honestly" She muttered to herself as she piled the boxes into my arms and I turned to leave.

I could barely see the front door let alone the steps, I nearly tripped twice and as I made my way toward the truck I could see Paul just stood there watching me. Such a gentleman, I didn't know why I expected him to help but obviously he wasn't going to. I loaded the boxes in and jumped in the front seat, my phone gripped in my hand, I was half praying someone would phone me but as he started the truck and pulled away my phone stayed silent.

After five minutes of nothing it got too awkward and started scrolling lazily through pictures on my phone and old messages, anything to take my attention away from him. The car stopped suddenly and my phone went flying from the grip and to the drivers side floor. Great, just great. He had slammed his breaks on harshly as we pulled up at the beach, such an ass. I leaned down to get it, my hand enclosing on it sooner than I thought it would and I flew back up, only for my head to crack against another and pain seared across the back of my scalp.

"Shit" I cursed as I sat back upright; Paul rubbed his forehead and blinked a little. Asshole, he had seen I was getting it.

"Oh sorry, maybe you should hold your phone tighter, wouldn't want it to smash now" He spoke sarcastically and bitterly as he hopped from his seat.

"Maybe you should learn to drive properly" I opened my door and slid out, he was still staring at me from his. "Asshole" I mumbled it but he slammed his door angrily, two could play that game. I threw my door shut equally as hard and simply smiled kindly at him as I walked around to the end of the truck to retrieve the food boxes. He was such an ass; no one ever got me angry enough that I answered back. I never got into arguments, I never as much as looked at someone wrong yet here he was making me turn into a bitch. I hated him; I hated Emily for making me come with him. Kim would have been better; she would have just ignored him happily.

I walked down toward the beach, I didn't have a clue where I was going but I just walked as fast I could to get away from him. I made it to the pebbled sand before he called for me; I was walking in the wrong direction. At least he told me, it probably would be his style to let me keep going. I followed him to a small area sheltered somewhat by a bundle of rocks and fallen trees, the wind wasn't as harsh here but it was still cold. I was in black skinny jeans and a hoody but it was still freezing.

"Here" The gruff voice I would be happy not to hear again interrupted me as I sorted out the food Emily had told me too, I glanced up at him and he held his jacket out, a thick waterproof fleece lined jacket that looked warm as hell. He had been wearing it minutes before.

"You'll get cold" I mumbled but he shrugged.

"I'm warm skinned, take the jacket before I change my mind and let you freeze" I wouldn't put it past him, he would definitely get some enjoyment at watching me shiver and so I took it. I was right, it was still warm from him and his scent lingered on it, a cologne like smell that didn't seem too fake or strong. I slipped it on and watched him as he sulked back to where he was building a few small fires.

"Why do you guys always have your bonfires outside?" I immediately realised what I said and shook my head at myself. "I mean, its cold out so why not do it indoors? The food and things, not the bonfire" I corrected myself and looked up at Paul, he was finished off the chairs and circles around the bonfires and shrugged at me.

"Old tradition I guess, telling stories around a fire. Besides, not all of us have houses big enough to fit entire parties of people in. This isn't some rich suburb" He sounded bitter the more he spoke and I frowned at his last statement, rich suburb? Did he think I came from one? My old house was smaller than Sam and Emily's, it had been a one bed rented house, kitchen, living room, bedroom and bathroom was all we had. I didn't correct him; it was none of his business anyway. "Need some help?" He walked toward where I was sat on the bench that was usually in Sam's yard and sat down before I could answer. I rolled an onion toward him and a knife, I hated cutting onions. Seeing him cry would be fun for me.

He didn't moan he just set about cutting it and I watched for a while; he got the whole way through without sweating a single tear. "How did you do that?" I pointed at the neatly cut onion and he frowned at me.

"With a knife" He spoke to me slowly as if I was dumb and I rolled my eyes.

"I mean without crying, I blubber like a baby if I'm in the same room as a cut onion" That wasn't an exaggeration. My mom often had to clear me out of the house before cutting onions. I watched as Paul reached for another onion and put it in front of me, he moved around the bench so that he was stood beside me and he bent over.

"Here, I'll show you, it's a trick my mom taught me" He huffed a little as he leant closer to me, his hand hovered over mine and after a few seconds of hovering it cupped mine, guiding me toward the onion. "You cut down here" He shadowed the knife over an area and moved it so I was scoring another part. "Then there, you miss the bit that makes you cry, just don't cut straight through the middle" He slowed as he spoke, his head was pressed against mine and I could smell him, there was subtle cologne but mostly he just smelled natural, like sea air. His body was somewhat stiff against mine and his hand slowly crawled from my hand to my arm, his fingertips tracing the skin of his jacket leaving fiery trails of shivers in its wake. For a guy who annoyed me so much, his touch was comforting. He stayed where he was, his body simply cupping itself around me causing a fire of warmth to engulf me, it was nice. His smell and his warmth, they were comforting. I wanted the moment to last but a shrill ring erupted from my pocket and I jumped dropping the knife to the table in front of me I ducked from Paul's hovering embrace.

I pulled my phone from my pocket, Kyle. I hadn't spoken to him much recently. I flicked the call on and held it to my ear.

"Hello" My voice shook and my body was still on fire from the touch that had seared through it seconds before.

"Hey, you haven't ...ok?" The phone broke up here and there and I ducked down to the flood to hide from the wind that was interfering.

"What?"

"I said, you haven't called...you...yeh?" It still crackled but I heard most of it.

"Hey Kyle, I have really bad signal I'm at the beach. I keep forgetting to ring you but I'm ok" I spoke as clearly as I could but I was still quiet, still not able to fully get over him being so close.

"The beach? It's December, are you crazy?" I heard him better as the wind died down and I smiled to myself.

"It's some sort of tradition apparently, I don't know. How's everything back home?" I glanced around at Paul, he was chopping the onion I had failed to do, his eyes flickered from the board to me.

"It's boring as hell without you, none of the other girls will come do anything fun with me like paintballing or go karting, I've had to take Sacha out the past two weekends and you know how much of a shit head I think he is" I laughed as I heard my best friend complain, Sacha was another boy we were friends with, he didn't do dance, he was from school but Kyle hated him secretly, always had.

"I'm sorry, I'll come back soon to visit I promise"

"You better had. I went to your mom's grave today and put flowers and a Christmas card there, it looks nice" My heart hammered and my throat went dry, I simply nodded as I blinked back harsh stings from my eyes. It should be me doing that.

"Thank you, you didn't need to do that"

"I wanted to, you're my girl and you can't be here to do it so it's my pleasure. Hey want to hear something funny? It will cheer you up?" His voice smiled down the phone to me and my mood picked up.

"Sure"

"Stacey Kitt was busted giving head to Mr Walkins the other day, you always said she was a slut" He laughed and I snorted with him. That was not what I was expecting. My eyes flashed over to Paul, his eyebrows were raised and his mouth pursed but I wasn't sure why, he couldn't hear Kyle.

"Shut up, that is funny. You guys never listen to me, I told you all she was doing that to get higher grades" I laughed a little, I hated that girl.

"You always said it was a good idea, should we warn your new teachers?" He laughed a little and I shook my head.

"You are so vile"

"Mmm, well I have to go, my grandma's here"

"Eww watch out for the moustache" I joked and he cried out in laughter, his grandma always had a moustache and more often than not it had dried food in it.

"Will do babe, I miss you and I love you, see you soon"

"I love you too, see ya" I lowered the phone, a smile still playing my lips as I slipped it into the pocket of Paul's coat. He was still chopping the salad things and I hopped up and over to the bench. "Sorry, you didn't have to do that" I grabbed my knife and a cucumber; he had done nearly all of it.

"Its fine, phone call was obviously important" He stood up and sulked off toward the bonfires he had set out, we were obviously back to him hating me.

Paul hadn't said another word after that, he simply kept himself away from me and occasionally gave me a glare the following hour had gone painfully slow. People began arriving but I still felt him staring horribly at me, Kim had come and quickly noticed it so had sent Jared to sort him out. Not that it did much; Jared seemingly got annoyed and stormed back over to his girlfriend.

"Hey Savannah" Seth's happy voice hit me as I sorted the cookies out with Emily, his huge smile greeted me and I fell into my own smile back at him.

"Hey Seth, you ok?" He nodded excitedly at me and grabbed at a gingerbread. "Bet your glad schools finished" I looked back up at him and he nodded again.

"Hell yeah, and even better, you'll be there when we go back" I grimaced as he beamed, I didn't want to go, I didn't like being new. I had never been new before and it was a record I wanted to keep. "It's not that bad, it's a tiny school, no one really cares about new people and beside you have us guys watching over you" He puffed his chest out proudly and I chuckled at him, he was cute.

"Very true, not sure I could manage without you there Seth" He shook his head at me and shrugged a little, as if it were common knowledge that he was the best person to have around. I looked around until I saw Sam; he was already watching me, his eyes narrowed as he scanned me. Mainly the jacket that swamped me, he took it in and glanced behind, and following his gaze I landed on Paul. It didn't surprise me much that he was glaring at Seth and I, his body hunched in small shakes as he glared. He was such an angry person.

"Savannah look, look" A little voice chirped beside me and I glanced down to see Claire running for me, Quil following. "I have a new pet, it's called leggy" She held a little box up for me to see and I squealed as she threw it toward my face, a spider. It couldn't come out of the box but I hated tose things. "It's not scary"

I hated children, I actually hated children.

"Claire I told you some people don't like spiders" Quil yelled from behind and grabbed the box from her. "Sorry" He glanced at me, I was still wide eyed at my near escape from the spider.

"You don't like spiders?" The little girl asked me and I shook my head. "But why?"

"They just creep me out" I shuddered at the thought and Quil laughed from beside her.

"What about worms?" She asked me innocently and I shrugged.

"Worms are ok"

"And snails?"

"Yep they are ok, just spiders and dogs, I don't like dogs" I frowned at her and she frowned back.

"Me neither, they smell" Her little hand waved in front of her nose and I nodded with her. Maybe this kid wasn't so bad after all. She just needed to lose the spider.

"Dogs? As in just dogs or all types of canines?" A new voice entered the mix and Quil and Seth rolled their eyes at who was behind me, it was Paul. I knew that low tone he had now, it still sent a shiver through me. I turned to look up at him, he had his cocky look about him.

"What?"

He smirked again and licked his lips before speaking. "Well, wolves for example, are you scared of wolves too?" He had a really cocky look about him and I wanted to make a witty response but I had nothing.

"I'll let you know if ever I meet one" Was all I could come up with and his smile grew wider.

"Paul" A harsh bark erupted from behind me and I turned to see Sam glaring at the guy beside me. "Come here" As if being ordered Paul turned and walked to his side, neither of them spoke to each other Paul just stood there like a little guard dog as Sam whispered something to Jacob.

"Ignore him, he's"

"Grumpy" I finished Seth's sentence and he smiled wide again.

"Something like that"

Paul was glued to Sam the rest of the night, it was like he was being told off and punished by having to stay directly beside him. A few guys made comments but I didn't understand any of them. Billy had taken to watching me carefully, I didn't know him well but I knew of him. He told stories to those who wanted to listen but I mainly talked with Kim, as he told a story about the third wife I found him staying at me. Billy, not Paul, it was strange. I had had enough of being stared at yet he wasn't doing it in an annoying way but more of a curious way, as if he were trying to find an answer in me.

"Savannah, Paul's going to take a few things back, there's no room in the other trucks so you need to go with him. Here is the house key, what's wrong?" Emily bombarded me and rushed a set of keys into my hand while I felt myself pale and my mouth drop open. I didn't want to go with him. "Not this again, he said the same thing. You two are like children, just go with him. He is not that bad." She rolled her eyes and walked away toward Kim, both of them turning to look at me as if they knew something I didn't. If they were trying to make Paul and I friends they were not going to succeed, the guy was an ass.

"You coming?" A gruff bark greeted me and I sighed as I turned to him, I had no choice obviously. I sulked up the beach after him as he carried a few things, I carried nothing, nor was I going to offer to help as he didn't help me earlier.

I didn't understand him, he was nice to me one minute then I took a phone call and he turned into an ass again. I didn't understand his moods. I climbed into the truck and sat in silence, staring out of the window as he pulled away. I stayed silent until we pulled into the yard, but by then tiredness was kicking it and he was irritating me. as I opened my door I turned to him, he simply looked ahead.

"I'm not entirely sure what I've done, but if I've done something to piss you off then I'm sorry" There was a sarcastic tone to my voice but I hadn't meant it sarcastically. Paul turned to look at me, a frown creasing his forehead.

"You haven't"

And with that he turned back to his straight ahead stance. Eurgh.

"Great, so you're just an asshole to everyone. Good to know, thanks for the lift" I climbed out half expecting him to yell at me but he simply said 'jacket'. Even that infuriated me. I unzipped it and chucked it back into the car before slamming the door shut. He was smirking; he was actually smirking as he pulled away.

I watched in stunned silence as he drove back out of the yard, then it hit me. The keys and my phone were in the jacket pocket. I was locked out and had no phone; even worse Paul had my phone. I hate him, I really hate him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Every glance is killing me  
Time to make one last appeal  
For the life I live**

**Stop and stare**  
**I think I'm moving but I go nowhere**  
**Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared**  
**But I've become what I can't be**

Stop and Stare- One Republic

I do not own the song above or the characters below !

* * *

Emily and Sam had taken another hour to get home; I had spent that hour cursing Paul from my place on the drafty and creaking porch of the old cottage. The darker it got amongst the trees the more alike the surroundings and the house itself got to stories like Little Red Riding hood, my mom had always exaggerated the stories and made them scary, this house fitted that story perfectly. Each leaf that fell, each howl of wind that whipped through the trees and each smash of a branch against another made me jump out of my skin. I had half expected a wolf to appear or a woodsman with a huge axe and an order to kill me like Snow White. Maybe my mom had made those stories a little too gory for me, five year olds weren't supposed to be told about hearts being ripped out after all.

Sam hadn't been cooperating with me on getting my phone back, he simply huffed that I shouldn't have used Paul's jacket; he had a real issue with Paul. I wasn't sure what it was but the more I mentioned the guy the angrier Sam got, Emily stayed quiet, simply watching with a guilty look on her face like she knew something. I had no idea what was going on but something was, and I was sure it involved Paul. I had gone to bed not long after they let me into the house last night, the last I had heard was Sam grumbling about something but I hadn't been able to make out what it was.

As I rounded on the steps I could hear him, Sam, he was talking lowly as if trying to whisper and failing.

"Jared's avoiding me too, every time I ask him about it he blocks me out. I would know if something had happened, wouldn't I? I'm the alpha, I would know" I slowed as I heard his voice clearer, alpha? What was an alpha? I mean I knew what an alpha was but why would Sam be one?

"He's still going through a rough time; Jared's his friend he's just looking out for him. If it was anything bad you would know Sam, don't let it bother you so much" Emily replied, her voice quivered, I had come to notice she did that when she was nervous or stressed about something. Her usual melodic tone wasn't there. I felt like I was intruding but I couldn't stay upstairs all day so I kept going, softly down the steps toward the kitchen I could already smell.

"No, somethings changed. The way he acts is different and the things he says. He goes straight home after patrol, Paul has never done that he usually goes for a drink or to whatever girl he's screwing over, he actually sticks to patrol times, he's been doing over time and the other day I found him following" Sam's words stopped as I hopped from the step onto the wooden floor of the downstairs area. He found me and his mouth dropped open in surprise, like he hadn't noticed me coming. "Her" He whispered, his face paling from russet tan to my lighter shading, his thick manly eyebrows met in a creased frown and he practically dropped his coffee cup.

"Morning Savannah" Emily yipped nervously as she stared between her fiancé and me, I had intruded on something, an argument maybe.

"I need to go" Sam suddenly yelled, the boom of his voice echoing off the walls and causing me to wince as he flew past me.

"Sam where are you going?" Emily yelled after him, her little body running nervously to the door.

"I need to see something" I heard him yell back before silence fell over the house, I glanced at Emily but she simply smiled a huge fake smile and pottered over to the living room and sat on the sofa staring into her lap. What the hell was that about?

I tried ignoring it, but there seemed to be a tense atmosphere growing throughout the small house, Emily said nothing as I got a bowl of cereal and nibbled at it, she simply stared at her lap as she picked nail polish from her fingers leaving it patchy and flaked.

I decided against sparking false conversation with her and instead grabbed my laptop and duvet and went outside to the porch, the wind was blowing and from what I could see the sky was either ready to snow or rain, I hoped for snow, I loved snow. Sam and Emily had the slowest internet connection I had ever come across but for some reason it worked quicker out on the porch and so I wrapped myself up in my duvet and sat on the long swinging porch chair. I wasn't reliant on technology but I had nothing else to do and so I logged on and prayed Kyle or Kerry would to. They didn't, and so I simply surfed FaceBook and Instagram for a while before Googling random things. I had to say, without the flow of guys it got rather boring here.

"Savannah" Emily's voice broke through my laptop trance and I glanced up, she was still smiling a fake smile as she looked down on me but now she was holding her bag and car keys. "I'm just popping out to get some things for Christmas, I have soup on the stove could you watch it for me? It will be done in about an hour so just turn it off and heat it when you're ready" I nodded as she spoke and she gave another half hearted grin before fluttering to her car. I don't think her and Sam had argued, he seemed more interested about someone else, Paul or Jared maybe. Maybe they had all fallen out, but then he had seemed fine with Jared last night.

A long sigh left me; it was giving me a headache worrying so much about what the hell was their problem. If it wasn't Paul confusing me with his mood changes then Sam joined in with him, it made no sense.

...

* * *

**Paul's point of view**

I had her phone, and the keys. I had locked her out, well I hadn't purposely but she had been locked out and it had started to rain the minute I left her, the wind had picked up. She would have been freezing. It had kept me up for hours, by the time I realised I had left with the keys and her phone I had been gone an hour, she had probably been let in by that point, or frozen to death.

I twiddled the phone between my fingers as I sat at the kitchen table, an Iphone, obviously. Worth about ten times more than what my brick was, but then she was a kid and kids these days had to have top products. Claire was barely through her toddler years and she had an Ipad that she played on constantly.

"Just look on it, I can tell you want to" Jared landed himself in the chair opposite me and slid a cup of coffee to me; I shook my head at him. I wouldn't look through it; I wasn't that much of an asshole. "But isn't it killing you? I mean you could find out so much on there, her friends, her likes/dislikes, pictures and her boyfriend"

My head snapped up a soft growl escaped my throat, Kyle, the guy she always talked about to Kim and Seth. The guy that had rung her yesterday and made her laugh and smile more than I had ever seen her smile. The thought made me feel sick; I didn't want to see pictures or texts.

"Jealous much?" Jared joked and I shook my head. Not jealous, I just thought Kyle sounded like a dick. She could date who she wanted, I just didn't care to see it. "Wish I had access to Kim's phone when we were first starting out, I would have loved some inside info, conversation starters"

"We aren't starting out, it's nothing like you and Kim" I growled at him and dropped the phone to the table beside me, I wish he would stop with the match making shit. I wasn't interested, I just wanted her to stop being around all the time. Even when I tried staying away she got thrust at me, the guys constantly mentioned her, or Sam thought about how she was doing or Emily made me give her freaking lifts like I was some sort of cab driver.

"Sure it's not, so why was she wearing your jacket again yesterday?" His eyebrows rose at me and I slammed my head down against the table. She was wearing it because she was shivering and her lips were going blue, I would have given it to anybody. "I bet you slept with it, it's covered in her scent I could smell it the minute I walked in this morning" He carried on and my stomach dropped involuntarily, it had smelled of her. It had filled my car and then my hallway, no matter how hard I tried ignoring it or spraying it with cologne her scent of shower gel and perfume still lingered and it was driving me crazy. Now he mentioned it, I could feel the scent wafting in from the hallway.

"Jared, can you just leave it? I'm not in the mood today" I moaned and got up, pouring my coffee out into the sink. I felt sick, I didn't want to eat or to drink I just wanted to escape this nightmare that she was making me live in. I couldn't even stand being around my best friends because of her.

"Well you better get in the mood, Sam's here" Jared quipped and I looked up through the wide kitchen window, his truck skidded to a halt and he stormed out, he looked ready to murder someone.

"What did you tell him?" I hissed at Jared, Sam never looked that angry, never. The only time I saw him that pissed was when Jacob broke away from the pack nearly a year ago. Jared simply shrugged at me, he wouldn't have told Sam, he promised me. The front door opened without a knock and Sam came hurrying into the kitchen he greeted us briefly before huffing and leaning against the door frame, his angry stance fading a little. He was in a hell of a mood.

"Savannah's phone" He pointed to the table and I nodded, his eyes didn't leave me as he spoke or reached for it. "She's been moaning all night about it, keys?" His voice was tense; he was trying to hide his bad mood but failed miserably.

"My jacket"

He nodded at me, his eyes shifted to Jared and he shoved the phone in his pocket. I didn't find it hard to imagine she had moaned about not having her phone, it was probably her most cherished possession, next to the drapes of jewellery she wore. Kim had informed Jared the necklace around her neck was Tiffany's or whatever that was, apparently some expensive designer, again not surprising.

" What do you think about her?" Sam asked looking directly at Jared, her face was clenched and his jaws tight. Jared simply looked at him as if he were crazy. "Savannah, I meant Savannah, what do you think of her?" Sam went on and Jared simply shrugged.

"She's a nice girl, why?"

"And you?" Sam's gaze shifted to me but it became harsher, he was watching for my reaction and I gave it without meaning to. I couldn't look him in the eye, my heart beat picked up and I felt nervous at the mention of her and his stare. He knew. "You little shit, you imprinted on my sister" He started shaking as he spoke through clenched teeth and his body went rigid. I tried shaking my head but I found myself unable to think of a reaction. I didn't think he would notice this soon, I hadn't even spent that much time around her. "Paul, no lies, did you imprint on her?" He ordered as he walked closer to me and I felt the weight of his words crushing down on me, I couldn't lie to him. I could lie to myself, to Jared, I could ignore it to myself but not to him. I nodded and he made his way for me.

"I didn't want to, I don't want to. I'm not interested" I hammered my words out and he stopped, his rigid body clenching tighter and shakes rolled from him. He was pissed.

"Why you, why you" He turned and slammed his clenched fist into the kitchen wall, a flake of paint fell off and he slammed his head down against it now. "Not you" He groaned over and over and my own anger sparked, what the hell did that mean?

"Excuse me?" I spat at him and he turned around to look at me.

"She's been through so much already and she came here to be cared for and she's stuck with you? You've not said one nice thing to her since she's been here, you're going to screw her over and mess her up again. I cannot believe this is happening" He shook more and I felt myself start, he only cared for her. No worries what she would do to me, she's already screwed me up with Rachel.

"I don't want her Sam, I'm not getting involved with her" I barked back at him and he snorted a sarcastic laugh.

"Even better, you're stupid as well as an ass. This is going to mess her over either way, you can't even take care of yourself let alone her" He kept going, his hissing words hitting me hard. He honestly thought so little of me? We had been friends for years.

"I'm not going to hurt her; I'm not going to get close enough. I'm not interested, I don't want to take care of her, I don't want any of this"

"Well tough, you're in it now Paul and you will not screw with her. You hear me? You will not treat her badly, I don't give a shit if you want this or not you've got it so you will respect her"

"Since when have you been loving big brother?" I yelled at him, I couldn't stand him right now. Telling me what to do, just because I imprinted on the kid doesn't mean I have to have her or love her, or respect her. She was nothing to me, she had once been nothing to him but obviously he doesn't care how I feel right now. As long as she's not screwed over it's fine.

"What did you say?" He turned on me again and my wolf let out a growl that his returned.

"You don't need to act the big brother protecting his little princess from the big bad wolf Sam, I don't want her. I don't want some spoilt little brat taking over my life, I won't be some whipped little lapdog like you" I growled at him and without any warning he launched himself toward me. His fist flying for my face.

"Well, that escalated quickly" Jared grumbled from his seat, instead of getting up he simply watched as Sam pounded his fists against me and I pounded any flesh I could of his. None of his blows hurt, I just couldn't regain my composure with his bigger build flying at me.

"GET OFF ME" I boomed as he shoved me back against the counter hitting my back on the hot coffee pot. His arm came up and pressed against my neck, choking me with his muscles.

"You will not hurt her Paul; you will not destroy her with your own self pity and selfishness. You hear me? Whether you want this imprint or not, you have it and you will not use it as a tool to hurt her" He growled at me, his jaws twitching as he spoke lowly. He had never been this angry before, maybe I underestimated him; maybe he did care for her genuinely.

"Come on guys, calm down" Jared finally stood up and pulled at Sam enough for me to be able to push him away from me.

"Do you hear me Paul?" Sam growled again and I stared him straight in the eye. His words weren't an order as such, they were a threat. My heart wrenched at each one, telling me I wouldn't hurt her, telling me I would look after her but my head fought back, I wouldn't intentionally hurt her but I didn't want her, I wouldn't fall after her like the other guys did. I wouldn't be owned by her or the imprint.

"Like I said, I'm not interested" As I spoke he looked ready to hit me again but Jared pushed him backwards and his glare shifted from me to Jared.

"You should have told me" He released himself from Jared's hold and stormed back out, slamming the front door as he went. It was silent as we listened to his truck pulling back out but it wasn't long until Jared turned to me with a smirk. He loved that, every minute of it.

"Don't say a word" I growled at him and he simply sat back down but his grin stayed in place.

...

* * *

**Savannah's point of view**

I hadn't felt like the soup, I had turned it off before returning to my place on the porch. I had now taken to watching Netflix, I was currently on an episode of Grey's Anatomy and I was fighting back tears, this show always had the ability to make me cry.

A loud slam made me look up and I saw Sam storming toward me, he slowed as he saw me. His angry facial expression softening into a sadness that I didn't understand, he walked up the steps only stopping when he came beside me. I pulled an earphone out too look at him and I saw a confliction resting in his dark eyes.

"I'm going to make lunch, is Emily back?" Even his voice sounded off, something was wrong. I nodded, she had got back only fifteen minutes ago and was pottering around indoors. "Come inside for food" He spoke not as a suggestion but sort of as an order, I wasn't hungry but I got up from the seat anyway and stumbled indoors after him. Emily noticed his mood immediately, her bright smile fading back to her nervous one from earlier, I don't think she was used to him being like this whereas I had no idea what his moods were like.

It was silent as I lay the table with cutlery and drinks, Sam dished out the soup while Emily cut bread. It was somewhat awkward and as we all sat down it showed no signs of getting better. I slurped on the soup a little but I felt uneasy, Emily had barely touched her either while Sam simply stirred the spoon around the bowl a few times.

"So, I was thinking we could put the Christmas decorations up tomorrow" Emily broke the silence and I found she was looking at me as she spoke. She said it was tradition for them to put them up Christmas even whereas back home Mom always got so excited by Christmas the tree was up by the 1st of December. I nodded at her and she smiled a little easier. "Kim will be coming over"

"Are you happy here Savannah?" Sam's curt voice cut across Emily and she glanced over at him, her smile fading to a deep frown. The question caught me off guard and as I looked up at Sam his expression caught me again, he looked sad, and guilty.

"Sorry?" I stammered a little, I didn't have a good feeling.

"I have been thinking whether it's better for you if you were to go back to Chicago" He spoke quietly and almost reluctantly, as if he had no other option but to say those words. Those words hurt, a pain hit me hard in the chest and I dropped my spoon into the sink. He didn't want me here.

"Sam" Emily breathed out slightly flabbergasted he had just said that. I didn't quite know what to say, I liked it here, I was getting settled here. If I went back to Chicago I would be in foster care and then I would be chucked out when I hit eighteen in a few months.

"I uhh if you want me to go, I'll go" A lump grew in my throat and my voice was thick, he didn't want me. His eyes dimmed even more with sadness, regret and he shook his head a little while continuing to spoon around the soup he hadn't touched.

"No, no. No, Savannah, this is your home. We don't want you to go. Sam" Emily didn't seem to know what was going on, her voice got firmer as she spoke and she turned determined as she addressed Sam.

He finally looked up at me and a sad smile flickered across his face. "It was just an idea, I didn't know if you were happy here. I want you here, this is your home now, sorry I just worried" He spoke quietly, his words weren't a lie but he still didn't seem right. Emily looked shocked, ready to cry as she took in Sam with her little eyes; she had no idea what was wrong with him.

"I got your phone back" Sam slid the black phone across the table to me and my heart hammered again, he had seen Paul. Was this to do with Paul? Had Paul said something? Did Paul hate me that much?

"Sorry, I need to take a walk" Sam suddenly moved and got up, his towering body walking slowly from the house and outside. He wasn't right, maybe I had done something wrong, or Paul had said something.

"You stay here, he didn't mean that, he loves having you here and so do I, we all do" Emily got up too, stopping only beside me to offer me a kiss on my head and a quick hug before walking out after her fiancé.

I didn't know what to feel, what to think or do. Something wasn't right with Sam, part of me didn't believe he wanted me to leave but he had asked me, did he not think I was happy here? I was, it wasn't home yet but it was better than a foster home in Chicago. It was better than living around those memories every day. I had been here two weeks and it was already breaking apart, maybe I wasn't supposed to have a family, a home. Maybe I was just supposed to be alone.


	12. Chapter 12

**Are you all still reading?! **

**Thank you for the reviews, follows etc I did get! I'm trying to update more regular as I feel it will help me keep readers so just let me know every now and then that you all still are reading! This chapter is a lot more of Sam and Savannah, I feel they need it after the last chapter where Sam had a freak out! For those commenting on whether she will leave, not yet...or maybe not at all.. who knows, but for now she's in La Push, I still need to build her character and relationships! **

**Thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts :D **

**I do not own Twilight**

**I walked across an empty land**

**I knew the path like the back of my hand**

**I felt the earth beneath my feet**

**Sat by the river and it made me complete **

**Keane- Somewhere only we know **

* * *

Sam had apologised. Not that it lifted the horrible feeling lying deep in my chest, I knew the feeling well, it was a feeling that had lay with me since a girl at school told me I only had a mom because my dad didn't want me. I had run home in a state, desperate for my mom to tell me it wasn't true and that the truth was the story she had always told me about my father being away 'helping' people. She had said nothing, she had simply stared at me whilst opening and closing her mouth out of shock, it was that moment when I knew her stories were lies and the truth was that I wasn't wanted by the man who was supposed to be my hero. I was six. Although I never knew my father, he was just a name without a face to me but I still longed for him. I always had that hurt that I hadn't been good enough for him, that he hadn't wanted his daughter. I didn't think the feeling could get worse; that was until my brother seemingly didn't want me either. That hurt. A lot. Sam was never mean, Sam was never loving, but he was never mean. Yesterday he had been mean, he had made me feel like a pain in his ass, like he didn't want me here and then once he planted that feeling in me, he walked back in with a guilty smile on his face and apologised by offering me candy. I was beginning to dislike the men from this place, La Push; it produced Joshua Uley, Paul Lahote and Sam Uley, each of them holding the ability to make me feel so low it was pathetic.

I looked up from my place at the kitchen table; Sam gave me a smile as he threaded popcorn onto string and placed another in his mouth. The glint his eye held showed his age, he was still young despite the fact he looked like a fully grown adult and had all these 'responsibilities' he kept talking about. I had been too harsh, he wasn't mean. Something was bothering him and it had something to do with me but he wasn't mean. Maybe I was acting unhappily, maybe I wasn't laughing enough or talking enough. I talked as much as I could, I laughed as much as I could. My shoulders deflated again as I realised I couldn't be any more normal if I tried, I wasn't unhappy here, I liked it here and I didn't know how else I could show it apart from what I was doing now.

I watched as Sam continued to threat popcorn, every other piece entering his mouth rather than the string. Emily had gone out to get Sue Clearwater, Seth's mom. She and Kim were coming here for a day of Christmas activities apparently, it was Christmas Eve and the guys were all busy working or visiting family, Seth was helping Jacob and so Sue was coming here, whereas Kim's parents had gone last minute shopping with her sister and so she didn't want to spend the day alone. I watched him a little longer, glimpses of the old Sam flashed at me as he went about his business seemingly unaware that I was watching him. He hadn't changed all that much since the last time he had visited, he had grown obviously and he had become slightly more serious but he was still kind, wise and in his own way playful. He hadn't said what he said yesterday to upset me.

"You're giving me the creeps" His rough voice made me jump as it broke across the silence of the house, my chair screeched backwards as my feet pushed against the floor in startle. I simply looked at him, a guilty smile slithering across my mouth as he glanced up at me. "Why are you staring at me?" Maybe he had noticed.

"I was just observing" I answered trying to sound innocent and not like a stalker. He just grinned at me as I scooted myself back toward the wooden table now littered in popcorn and string. The silence came back for a minute, he just grinned while continuing on with the task Emily had set him while I wrote out Christmas present tags for various people, most of which I hadn't even met.

"Remember when we wanted to make popcorn but you had no popping corn"

"So we used sweet corn with toffee syrup on" I finished his sentence for him as the memory washed over me.

"Our mom's were so mad" He laughed along with me and I nodded, they had gone bat shit crazy at us when they found us staring at the microwave that was covered in burnt sweet corn and toffee syrup stuck on the sides.

"Yeah and you blamed it all on me" I pointed at him, accusation screaming in my voice. He was such a wimp.

"Well you shouldn't have done it"

"I was nine" I argued back with him and he laughed again. "Besides it was your idea, you were the older one and you just hung me out to dry. I was grounded for a week; do you know how hard it is being nine and being grounded? I couldn't ride my bike down the street for seven days, seven days with no bike action. Not just any bike"

"A bright blue racing bike with red stripes down the side. I remember that bike, you were obsessed with that bike" Sam pointed at me, a fond smile brightening his face again. The pain in my chest eased a little as I heard his words; maybe he had paid attention on his visits. I needed to give this guy more credit. "What happened to that bike?" He frowned at me a little and my smile faded, that bike ripped out my heart.

"Mom gave it to a kid down the road apparently he was less fortunate than us, although I don't see how, I mean they had a computer" I made a face, that kid was a little shit. He was not less fortunate than me.

"Because they had a computer?" Sam rose a brow at me and I nodded.

"We didn't have a computer until last year; and I worked three months overtime at the diner to get that. Plus that kid had his own bedroom; I shared one with mom until I was fifteen and even then I only got my own one because she moved to the couch. Less fortunate my ass" I rolled my eyes earning a round of laughter from Sam. He glanced down at the tag I was writing, it was for someone named Edna Stevens.

"You haven't signed your name" He pointed out and I frowned at him, why would I sign my name?

"I do not know an Edna, nor did I pay for the present" I shrugged and his grin came back.

"It's a knitted scarf, hardly broke the bank" He stopped, his eyes narrowing as he looked at me. "And Edna Stevens is your grandmother"

I stopped mid way through writing Merry Christmas and looked back up at my brother. "My grandma died and her name definitely was not Edna" I corrected him but my heart began fluttering fast.

"The grandma you knew died; the grandma you never met is still very much alive and is definitely called Edna. Edna Stevens-Uley, and dying to meet you" He pointed at me, a soft smile slipping across his face. My heart picked up again and I found myself getting hotter under his stare and his words. I knew I had two sets of Grandparents, most people did. But I guessed they had died, I would never meet them. Why would I when I never met my father?

"His parents" I whispered and Sam nodded, his body falling tense as I mentioned the father we never had. "So why am I signing this to Edna Stevens?" I stiffened my back and tried acting like this information wasn't affecting me.

Sam gave a chuckle before rolling his eyes. "Well, pops died a couple years ago and Gran being Gran thought that if she stopped using the name Uley she would pick up a stud muffin, her words not mine, at her local old persons activity centre. She's a little, well, crazy" He laughed harder and I gave a slight chuckle too, an old woman saying stud muffin, or even contemplating looking for a man after her husband dies had to be a little crazy. "Heart of gold though, and she keeps ringing Emily asking when she can meet her other grandchild"

I frowned harder again, why would she want to meet me?

"She knew about me?" I asked quietly and Sam nodded while giving me a look like I was the crazy one. "Why? Why would she know or care?" Again, Sam looked at me like I was stupid and readjusted his position in his seat.

"Why wouldn't she care? You're her granddaughter. She knew the minute my mom knew, her and pop really stepped up when he left, they helped us out a lot and so my mom told them, they always wanted to come and meet you but they were too old to fly, too scared to intrude. You don't have to meet her, I didn't mean it like that" He suddenly added on the end and my heart went crazy again, I hadn't ever thought of meeting other family, especially from his side. Him being Josh Uley. But I shook my head at Sam and shrugged.

"I guess I could meet her" I nodded now and he smiled, his hands crawling back for the popcorn.

"Good, she can stop ringing me at all hours of the day asking if she can pop over. The only thing she will pop if she moves from her chair is her hip"

I laughed at that, Sam joined in and I realised as I sat there laughing with my half brother, we had just had the first real conversation since I had got here. It wasn't about the guys, or about what I liked or disliked or awkward questions about school that were forced out by Emily, it was just a conversation. It felt nice, normal. As the laughter stopped the silence came back, but it wasn't awkward, it just was. I didn't sign my name, I just wrote out what Emily told me too and moved on to Embry's tag, I was going in alphabetical order.

"You can hardly talk about me getting you into trouble, remember that time you made me go to watch that god awful musical, what was it called?" Sam suddenly spoke and I jumped again, his voice was far too low and booming for a quite house like this. I just looked at him, not quite sure what he was on about. "Oh come on, you know the one I mean. It was your birthday and we saw that musical" He carried on, I shook my head at him. I knew what he was on about now but I said nothing just waited for whatever he was getting ready to do.

"Ahh you were like 12" He sat bolt upright now, moving his hands around as if trying to remember something.

"What are you on about?" I fake frowned, Annie, he was on about Annie. It was playing in Chicago around my birthday and Sam and his mom were coming so we got tickets, I was ten, not twelve. My mom sent us with ten dollars to get drinks during the break and Sam left me in the middle of a crowd while he got mesmerised by the girl behind the counter. Long story short, I got so upset I burst into the theatre just as the show was starting crying my eyes out holding a melted ice cream. Sam got grounded and I got a new ice cream, and I didn't get told off once when I spent the next three days singing Annie tunes to him at the top of my voice.

"Mmm mmm mmm tomorrow...That one" He grinned like a child being praised for doing something good and banged his hand on the table. "Just thinking about tomorrow, hold on till tomorrow, duh duh duhhh"

I wanted to laugh as he started singing but my eyes fell on the window behind him, I could see out to the yard and I could see that Emily had pulled up with Sue, not just Sue but Kim and Jared. Instead I frowned harder at him and he sung louder, very out of tune.

"The sun will come out tomorrow duh duh duh duh duh duh tomorrow, there'll be sun. Think of a day grey and lonely, stick out your chin and grin and say" He was waving his hands around, his face getting annoyed as I continued to frown at him like I had no clue but the door behind him had now opened and his fiancé could most definitely hear him.

I waited for them to walk in and catch the end of his singing before standing up and grinning down at my brother. "Sorry Sam, I have no idea. Do any of you know that song? It's from Sam's favourite musical, second to Cats of course" I smiled sweetly as the group came in through the door and Sam span around to see them all watching him like he had lost his mind. Big serious Sam singing a song about sunshine and happiness, he turned back to look at me with what can only be described as severely unimpressed.

"You are evil. Always have been, always will be" Sam grunted as he made an attempt to look manly as he leant back in his chair and puffed his chest out.

"Do I even want to ask?" Emily was smiling now as she walked further in followed by the others who were also smiling as they watched Sam squirm under the attention.

"We were just taking a trip down memory lane; did Sam ever tell you about the time he lost me in a packed out theatre? He left me in a crowd while he went and chatted up some blonde girl who looked like she had been hit in the face with a spade" I smiled wider at Sam and he narrowed his eyes while shaking his head.

"Yeah well Savannah used to run around naked with pants on her head calling herself captain underpants" Sam looked at me, an evil smirk on his face.

"Aww that's cute" Kim piped up and Sam nodded.

"She was nine" He was such an ass. I went through a phase; I was still cute and little when I was nine.

"Yeah and Sam used to wear this awful leather jacket, he thought he was the Native American version of John Travolta, used to gel his hair up like this" I reached across the table and flicked a bit of his floppy hair up into a rolled out quiff. He slapped my hand away pretty quickly but Emily was already laughing.

"Ok ok, you win" Sam held his hands up defeat and pushed his chair back across the floor ready to stand up while a grinning Kim, Sue and Emily walked further into the house. Jared stayed hovering by the door, an equally big smile on his face. "But when Sav was fifteen I found her singing into a deodorant can whilst dancing in the mirror, what was it you called yourself? Savannah Montanna?" Sam winked at me and jerked up from his chair as I went to hit him, asshole.

"As fun as this is, we really need to go" Jared piped up from the door, his smile had grown but he was being serious and Sam nodded to him.

"I'll see you all later, get to bed early otherwise Santa won't come" He pointed to me and smiled again, I liked happy Sam better than grumpy Sam. I rolled my eyes and he copied me dramatically before walking toward the door. He stopped and turned back, his eyes looking at my pile of present tags. "Write your name on the tags, Savannah Uley" He was being serious, the way he said it made the pain in my chest clench before releasing and I found myself following him outside. A little spark of hope flurrying as I ran out onto the porch and followed him down the steps.

"Does that mean I can stay then? I don't have to go back?" I called out and he stopped, Jared turned with a frown on his face as he heard me and looked at his friend. He obviously didn't know about Sam's sudden words last night.

I watched as Sam looked back at me, his face expression sad and guilty as he shook his head. "I don't want you to leave, I was being an idiot. Now go and write your damned name on the cards" I smiled as he spoke, his words true and his expression softer. Maybe I had over reacted too quickly, Sam wasn't mean, he was hiding something that worried him but he didn't want me to leave and from the relief spreading through me I don't think I wanted too.

As Jared and Sam walked back toward the tree line a new body came out from the shadows to great them and Sam stopped suddenly, his body tensing as he ran into Paul. My own body froze as I lingered at the porch steps and my eyes hit his, he was quite beautiful, painfully so. As he looked at me he didn't look unkind or hateful, in some ways he looked confused, worried but as quickly as the moment happened Sam was shoving him harshly and angrily away and back into the trees. Jared offered me a final sad smile before vanishing after his friends and I was left to simply search the shadows of the cold wind swept trees.

"Savannah" A voice spoke behind me and I looked back to see Kim watching from the door. "Come on, the tree doesn't put itself up" She grinned and held the door open for me, I gave a final look to the trees, the feeling of someone watching me hitting me before I turned back and walked into the house that was now full with the sound of Christmas music. The three females inside the house all looked at me, the strangest looks on their faces.

I liked the people here, but damn were they strange. And hiding something, definitely hiding something.

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	13. Chapter 13

**Hello, thank you for all the lovely comments! hopefully this will start moving the story along nicely and you enjoy this chapter! :D Remember keep letting me know your thoughts! **

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They gave me presents, actual presents. I had been here only just two weeks, I hadn't expected a thing but I had woken up to a pile of presents all for me. I had a few from Sam and Emily and then others from various guys of the pack but it was obvious Emily had chosen them all, still, it was the thought that counts. I had been given a lot of candy, fluffy socks and pyjama's, various chick flicks, make up sets, nail polishes and from Kim I had what looked like a hand carved picture frame, the wood was twisted and shaped into perfect swirls that looked like thick tree branches and trunks, leaves were detailed in here and there and a short word carved in at the bottom, I couldn't read it because it wasn't English but it was the most beautiful frame I had ever seen.

I hadn't got Sam or Emily anything but neither one asked nor seemed to look for one, I had come here with little money to hand. My inheritance although not much was put into savings for when I decided to go to college, not that I was looking at attending college, I was never very academic. I had applied for a summer dance programme but not for actual college, it had never been high on my priorities and after mom died I completely gave up on any thoughts for my future, dance was now out of the question too.

That thought killed me, today was killing me. It wasn't even that I felt like I was intruding it just felt wrong, this time last year I was huddled around a small tree in the front room/my moms bedroom in Chicago opening presents that more often than not revolved around dance or my favourite bands with my mom filming every second of it as if I were still a child. This year she was gone and the dancing was gone, as I helped Emily prepare lunch the Christmas music was on but my mom wasn't there doing her god awful booty shakes or high notes that could crack glass. I missed the sight of her embarrassing Santa sweater and her cheeks that blushed red with the more wine she drank. My mom and I never had much but our house was never lacking in laughs or smiles, she made sure of that. This place was full of happiness too, but it wasn't the same. I wanted my mom here. I knew Christmas would be hard but this was worse than I thought, each time I smile or laughed with my brother and Emily I felt like I had forgotten her, like I had cheated on how it should be.

"Hey" I jumped as Sam's voice cut through the silence of my bedroom; I turned to look at him dropping the picture frame Kim had got for me to my desk.

"Hey" I sounded sad, I probably looked it too. I wanted to cry, I wanted to curl up in a ball and kick myself for going along with this morning as if the most important person in my life wasn't missing. For an hour or two I had forgotten the gaping hole in my life where my mother should be and now I felt like shit.

"You ok?" He edged himself in more and leant against the wooden door frame. I nodded at him but he raised his eyebrows telling me he could see through my lie. "It's ok to miss her Savannah, it's also ok to be happy" His voice dropped to a whisper, as if scared that he was over stepping the line. He wasn't, his words cut at my chest but he hadn't overstepped his mark. He was right, but it still didn't feel right. It wouldn't for a long time, that hole couldn't be filled.

I didn't want to talk about it, the lump in my throat would only grow more and the tears wouldn't be able to stay in and so I simply gulped and picked the frame from Kim up. "I was just wondering what this meant, I can't read it" I held it out for him and he strode across to me taking the frame as he came to a stop.

"You wouldn't be able to, it's Quileute" His thick finger ran over the carved words and never ending branches and leaves. "It means friend, it's from Kim?" He looked up at me and I nodded back, a smile playing my sad lips as he told me the meaning of the word.

Friend, that was nice. I liked Kim a lot, she was very sweet and very caring, she was a good friend to have.

"That's nice, she didn't have to. None of you did, I've only been here two weeks" I took the frame back and my eyes fell on the pile of presents now lying on my bed.

"You're my sister, buying you presents has nothing to do with the time period you've been at my house" Sam was smiling as he spoke and I blushed a little, I liked hearing him refer to me as sister. Although we had known each other all my life practically and we had been comfortable and at ease with one another, we had never been that close. He had never played a protective big brother role or openly talked about me being his family. Lately he had done it a lot and I liked hearing it, when my mom died I felt like I had no one left but Sam was slowly letting me see that I did.

"Well thank you" I put the frame back down, my eye scanning the word again. "I didn't realise you had your own language, I mean you don't speak it normally"

"No I guess like with a lot of old tribal languages it died out, the council went through a period when I was at school of trying to re-introduce it and so they taught it more and encouraged families to use simple phrases such as when saying good night. A lot of people don't speak it, I mean Quil wouldn't have a clue if you asked him to read something as simple as one, two, three, four" He started chuckling and I smiled with him, Quil wasn't stupid by any means but he was very laid back and I can imagine at school he got the grades he got and that was fine with him, the sort of guy that if he graduated then he graduated if he didn't then he didn't.

"What about the others?"

"Ummm yeah, I suppose they all speak it but not fluently, well Jacob is a wiz, his parents used it a lot when he was younger. Kim is practically fluent but its Kim so I wouldn't expect anything less, the others are the same I suppose, they get taught it at school and so they know what sticks with them, same with me" I nodded along with him, I would suck at learning the language. I hardly knew their tribal histories let alone be able to pronounce their words.

"I'm about to go pick my mom up, did you want to come with me?" Sam turned and looked down at me as he backed away from where I leant against my dressing table. My hand flew to the locket around my neck, I knew his mom but I only saw her when my mom was there too. It was the main part of today I wasn't necessarily looking forward too, no doubt his mom would mention mine or ask questions, things I wasn't quite ready for.

"No thank you" I squeaked a little and he continued toward the door, a thought him me before he left and I called out stopping him. "Actually, would you mind if I went for a walk? I feel like I have eaten a horse and I could really do with some air" I looked out of my window toward the trees, I liked it out there. It was peaceful and I could be alone, it was a freezing cold day, a few snow flakes had fallen this morning but nothing a jacket couldn't protect me from. Sam said nothing for a minute but I heard the floor boards creak under his weight.

"Uhh yeah, just don't go too far and don't be too long. It's cold and it will be dark soon" He sounded off, somewhat hesitant but when I turned to look he had gone fully from my view.

I didn't wait around for anybody to halt me; I simply grabbed a few extra layers, a jacket, a thick woolly scarf and my ankle boots before running downstairs. Emily was on the phone to her mom and so simply waved at me as I walked out, Sam had already left and so I hurried my way to the tree line. The sky was a thick dirty white colour, full of snow as my mom used to say. The air even amongst these thick trees was crisp and wintery, each intake of breath brought me a sharp sting, winter was well and truly here. I loved the crisp air of winter, I always had. I loved seeing my breath hitting the air around me when I breathed and how the twigs and leaves crunched beneath my feet.

I concentrated so hard on the sounds of the ground and the wintery woodland that I hadn't realised how far in I had become, it was darkening fast but I wasn't afraid. Even out here in isolation this place seemed safe, protected. It was so beautiful how could anything harmful live here?

I stopped as I reached a small opening, there was a stream running through the middle of it, only a tiny stream. It was frozen over and I dunked my foot onto the layer of ice that cracked instantly, cold water soaked onto my leather shoe but my foot got no colder. It was only then when I stopped to watch the ice layer cracking that I heard a snap behind me, the crunching of leaves I had listened to hard to earlier was now following me and I span myself around. My heart plummeted when I saw the person hurrying from behind the thick trees, my cold body flushed with an annoyed heat and the equally annoyed stare I knew so well looked right back at me.

"What the hell are you doing out here?" Paul snapped at me, he was in jeans and a skimpy white t-shirt, yet he wasn't shivering. I was in several layers and I still stood here turning blue.

"Walking, Sam said I could" I squeaked a little as I talked and Paul gave a harsh eye roll as he watched me.

"Well that makes it all better then doesn't it" His words snapped at me loudly and a flutter of birds flew out of the trees above us, he was loud when he was annoyed. But this was hardly my fault, he was following me not the other way around. "You shouldn't be out here"

"So why are you?" I snapped back instantly and the big man in front of me stopped in his movements and eyed me up. I didn't quiver under his stare I simply held it, he was fine to snap at me and make me feel stupid but he didn't expect me to dish it out.

"Not that it's your business but I'm working, it's my job to be out here to make sure stupid little girls don't get hurt" He spat as he talked and my heart jolted in my chest, he thought I was stupid. I had only come for a walk to get out of my negative and aching thoughts but now I wish I hadn't.

"I'm not stupid" I sounded pathetic; I just needed to shut up.

"Coming this far out alone is stupid Savannah, it's not safe out here and Sam should know better. Anything can happen out here and nobody would know, so yes it is a stupid thing to do" I would have answered back but my mind lingered too long on the fact he had said my name, I don't think I had heard him say my name since I got here but now he did it sounded so melodic, it rolled from his tongue like a lullaby and all I could do was replay it in my head. "Come on, I'll take you home" He huffed as I said nothing back to him and held out his hand, not to take mine but to guide me in the right direction.

My own defence came springing up now though and I stood defiantly where I was. "I'm sure you have better things to do than take a stupid little girl home" I wanted to sound confident and snappy, like he did but I failed miserably. I could hear the sadness in my voice and so could he.

"I do but unlike your brother I know it's safer that I take you myself, so come on" He held his hand out still and still I didn't take his guiding. I would go home, not because he was telling me to but because I was cold.

"It's fine I can take myself, I'm good with directions" I snapped a little better this time and went to walk past him, his hand dropped and he simply watched me go as I walked through the trees, I wasn't sure it was the right direction but I kept going anyway.

"Didn't realise you lived in Forks" Paul's voice called out and I turned to look at him, his eyebrow was raised in a cocky sort of smirk. Obviously it wasn't the right direction, I turned on the spot and marched away to my right, I could hear him following me still.

I tried ignoring him but his footsteps were too hard to block out, he was a loud walker. As my mom would say, he sounded like a herd of elephants. My eyes scanned the surroundings, it looked familiar but I was in a place full of trees, it all looked the same. I looked around trying to find the funny shaped tree I had paid attention to on my walk out here, it had looked like the tree from Pocahontas, the curves in it looked somewhat like a face but as I looked around now not Pocahontas tree could be seen.

"You're going the wrong way" His voice offered up behind me and I sighed in agitation. I didn't want him to follow me; he had done enough of that today.

"Don't you have more stupid little girls to go and annoy?" I mumbled under my breath as I continued on my way and he barked a laugh out behind me.

"Nope just you, all the other stupid little girls are sat playing with their princess make up sets and dolls, shouldn't you be doing the same?" His heavy footing began again and I stopped, he shouldn't have heard me say that I had whispered it. But that wasn't what annoyed me, his words did.

"Well, I haven't played with dollies since I was seven so it's your lucky day, obviously" I tried not to look at him, I wanted to, I wanted to look at his beautiful coloured skin and his defined jaw line but I didn't. I just looked at the trees towering over me and tried to remember the way I had come.

"Obviously" He remarked sarcastically and I huffed before walking off through a set of trees that looked familiar but the further through them I walked the more annoyed I got, even more so when I came to a halt beside the stream I had seen earlier, the same piece of ice cracked on top of it. I had gone in a loop.

"I thought you said you were good with directions?" Paul's voice became closer than I expected and I jumped as his arm brushed against my jacket, I hadn't heard him come that close. I let out a long sigh as I realised he was never going to leave me alone out here.

"You aren't going to leave me alone are you?" I asked for confirmation and he shook his head.

"No, I've never had a death on my watch and I'm not about to start now. This way, little girl" He had his smirk on as he began walking away into the woods, it annoyed me the way he said little girl. It's like he thought of me as a child when I was anything but. I didn't want to follow him but I had too, I had got myself lost.

"Why would anyone have a death of their watch? What's the worst that can happen out here? Someone trips and drowns in that tiny stream?" I asked sounding as snappy as I could master, Paul stopped walking and turned to me, his face in a full grin as he looked down at me. I was rather short compared to him.

"You're in wolf territory, the worst that could happen is you piss off a volatile wolf and bye bye goes you're pretty face, scared yet?" He lowered his voice as he spoke, his eyes not leaving mine however I found myself scanning the woods around us. Wolves, Sam had never mentioned a wolf pack running wild here. I should be scared, wolves were notoriously packs of animals to be scared of, the big bad wolf appeared in many fairytales but as I stood staring back at Paul I couldn't find my fear.

"No"

He looked impressed for a minute as I spoke defiantly back at him but as quickly as the impressed look came he made another comment. "Well you should be, there's more than angry wolves in these trees, little girl" With that he turned around and began walking again, I followed in a stumble but my mouth fumbled for words.

"Like what?" I hurried into a stride alongside him but he looked straight ahead, a look crossed his face even worse than the ones he had given me, true hatred flashed in his eyes and for a second he looked as if he were ready to kill someone but still, I wasn't scared.

"Nothing, old tribal stories that's all"

"Which stories?" I had heard Billy tell a story but I had been distracted, I hadn't listened all that well and I couldn't really remember what it was about. Paul seemed to think about it for a minute but then shook his head.

" Come on, I don't have all day to spend running around the woods with you playing story time"

"I'm not a child, Paul" I snapped before he got all of his words out and I stopped, he turned to look at me somewhat taken aback but I stood my ground. "You keep calling me little girl or insinuating that I'm a child when I'm not, so don't treat me like one" I wasn't sure where the confidence to have a go at him came from but it came and he seemed speechless as I said them.

"Ok, I'm sorry" Maybe all he needed was me to tell him not to do something, maybe he just needed to know I wouldn't be treated badly. "Little girl" He added in tauntingly and my body flew back into defence mode making me storm off in the completely wrong direction but away from him.

He was such an ass.

"Wait" He called out and his heavy footsteps pounded after me again, a tight grip tugged at my arm and I was swung back around causing me to nearly trip as my feet didn't register the pull. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry I won't do it again" He whined as he pulled me back to where he was standing, I couldn't tell if he was genuine but a couple seconds passed and no little girl comment came so I nodded at him. He let go of my arm and began walking again, slower this time so I could keep up.

"I mean there was no need to throw a tantrum, you only had to say" He shrugged at me, his voice layered with a smile and I started walking faster in an attempt to escape. He was laughing now as he followed me, even my hurried walk wasn't enough to escape him and within seconds he was striding alongside me. I didn't care if he thought he was funny it annoyed me that he seemed to constantly think of me as a child.

"No no, I'm actually sorry, I won't do it again" I looked at him unsure of whether to believe him, he wasn't looking at me horribly but I still didn't trust him. "I promise, I promise" He held his hands up in surrender and I sighed not having another choice but I accept his words.

"It wouldn't hurt for you to try to not hate me so much, the comments and glares get boring after a while" I mumbled again as we started walking and for a minute he said nothing, I had sounded hurt when I spoke so I guess he felt awkward but he could have said something back.

"I don't hate you" I stopped but he carried on, his words caused my heart to lift and do a thousand somersaults in my chest. He didn't hate me that was something. "Hating you, stems from caring for you and that's also something I don't do"

My heart fell back down with an almighty crash and my knees were ready to fall from beneath me but I stayed upright somehow, I felt like I was falling, as if my gravity was fading and I had nothing holding me up which was stupid because it was only Paul and his words shouldn't hurt like that but they did and I hated him for how ignorant and cruel he could be. I stared at him as he continued to walk, each step he took gave me a kick of anger, annoyance and soon enough the aching feeling he had thrown at me turned to anger and I stormed back toward him.

"You know what, I have no idea what your problem is but you don't even know me, you haven't given me a chance to know you let alone enough time for you to be able to stand there and make judgments on me. I have never met such an arrogant dick. I can find my way from here I would hate to inconvenience you anymore, little boy" I continued to storm past him, my body pumping harshly as I went. I never called anyone anything remotely mean to their faces, I had never argued like that with someone. I was thumping with adrenaline and anger as I stormed further and further through the trees, I couldn't hear him behind me and I didn't look back.

How dare he think he can treat me like shit when he doesn't know me? How dare he think he can stand there and be all fine with me when he wants to be and cruel when it suits him, who the hell does he think he is? He's an asshole, I know that much. An asshole that gets his highs off upsetting other people, he stood there and called me a child when it is him that acts like one. Sam will go mad when he knows I called his friend that, but I wasn't sure I cared. He deserved it. He was acting like a little boy and an arrogant dick.

I slowed my pace as I continued in the direction Paul had led me, I could hear a voice, a girl. I slowed to a halt and listened, when the wind was quiet enough I could hear her words, they were soft and childlike. A giggle travelled through the trees and I found myself edging closer toward it, steering from my path I lingered in a dense pack of tall thick trees and peered around, there was an opening larger than the one I had been in earlier and the giggling filled it, my eyes looked up at the frost covered floor, snowflakes were falling. It was a beautiful opening, the trees cleared it just enough for the sky to shine down, it would be nice if the sun was beating down right now.

I went to turn not able to see the source of the voice when it came again.

"Silly Jake, look I can catch it" The voice giggled and my body froze as on the other side of the opening someone, or something stepped out, not a someone a something, a dog. No, not a dog, a wolf. A huge wolf. My breath caught in my throat as I watched it step out into the glistening frost covered clearing, its long nose looked up into the sky and its eyes narrowed with the sheer brightness of the snow clouds. Snow was falling now, soft and light but it fell. I couldn't see the girl who was giggling but I didn't need to. I needed to get out of here; Paul said this was wolf territory. An angry wolf was all it would take to rip my face to shreds is what Paul said and so I turned and sprinted back to the path where I had left Paul, he was gone. Of course he was gone, he didn't care about me so why would he stay?

A wolf, I saw a wolf and it was freaking huge. A wolf, this close to people's houses, but who was the girl? Whose voice was that and who was Jake?

I didn't want to stay and find out; if they were people out for a walk they would be eaten by now. Angry wolves travelled in packs, I needed to get to Sam's. I should have taken the insult and stayed with Paul. No, I shouldn't have, I would rather see a scary wolf than spend another second with that asshole.

I ran harder and eventually I found the dirt road that I knew led to Sam's and so I sprinted just as hard down that, Sam's truck was there when I reached the yard but I didn't stop, I ran harder until I got to the porch and threw myself in through the front door.

"Savannah, we were getting worried" Emily's voice found me first and she was just as quick in getting to my side. "What's wrong you look pale? You are freezing" She tugged at my arms pulling me in so the door behind me shut, what was wrong was that I just saw a wolf that was abnormal in size and some little girl had probably been eaten and Paul had caused the already aching hole in my chest to hurt even more.

"Wolf" I breathed out trying to find my breath as the warm air hit my cold body. Emily froze beside me, her grip on my arm tightening as she stood deadly still.

"What?" She breathed out and I looked up now, she looked terrified. Sam too, he was stood in the kitchen holding the kettle and he just stared at me as if he had seen a ghost.

"Wolf, I saw a wolf" I tried again, I was so cold still that I was chattering as I spoke. Emily gave a nervous laugh and pulled me closer to her small body before saying something about getting me a cup of tea.

"I see Sam's been telling you the old stories again, wolves and third wives, wolves and cold ones, he always was a sucker for those stories" A new voice joined the mix and my eyes darted to the sofa where an older lady sat, I recognised her in an instant, Sam's mom. "Those stories get into people's heads dear, there haven't been wild wolves here for hundreds of years, they were either killed by white settlers or moved on to higher ground" Her glistening smile shone at me while her eyes locked on mine, kind and gentle as always but her kind look didn't fool me, she was a strict woman when she wanted to be, kind but strict.

I heard her words but I knew what I saw, no stories had got into my head. I looked at Sam for an explanation but all I got was his back and nervous shakes of his hands as he poured a cup of tea, but it was Emily that confirmed to me something was up with the wolf, she had gone deathly silent and her grip on my arm was so tight it began to hurt through my layers, but it was her fake smile that gave her away. She looked petrified.


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you for the reviews and support with this story, I'm getting really into writing it :D **

**I do not own Twilight**

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I sat deadly still, just listening as the people around me launched into false conversations and strained laughs. The dynamics of the day had changed, not because of the extra person in the room but because of what I had said. I was sure of that. Sam and Emily had both looked ready to pass out when I mentioned the wolf and as the clock ticked on they only became more false and strained, both of them stirred empty conversations that could never find its way back to what I had said. They offered food and drink each time I opened my mouth even if it were to say something completely off the topic I really wanted to talk about, something was wrong here. I could feel it coursing through me; something was different in this place.

"Do you still dance honey?" The voice I had blocked out came back into focus, louder this time, Sam's mom Allison had stirred most of the conversation and as I had predicted earlier a lot of it was aimed at me, questions about how I was and comments about my mother. Things I didn't particularly want to hear at any normal time but today the subject was specifically touchy, I missed her more today.

My eyes stayed locked on my brother for a minute as he nibbled nervously at a cookie but he didn't look back up at me, he hadn't done since Emily had sat me down on the sofa an hour ago. I finally turned to the woman I had known most of my life, her kind smile made me flinch, her simple smile held things I hadn't seen aimed at me for months now, it was a smile only a mother could give. "No, no I don't" I whispered trying to ignore the aching in my chest, I wouldn't cry, I was stronger than that.

Her smile faltered her and a pitiful look glazed over her brown eyes. "That's a shame; you were always so beautiful in the way you moved. How about that dance school, your mom always raved about you going to that dance school, do you still plan to go?" Again my chest ripped with a heavy ache as I shook my head, no. "College?" Her voice was hopeful but my mind was not, I wouldn't get into college even if I tried and if I did I would last a month if that, I wasn't dumb but I wasn't academic, I got good grades but I didn't enjoy it. College had only ever interested me if it was a dance college and now, now I didn't even have that.

"Uh no, no" I paused watching for her reaction but when the look of pity and grief flooded her older complexion I shifted. "I'm really tired, if you don't mind I'm just going to go to sleep" I cut in before she could offer any more words of sympathy or question me further. I liked Allison, I always had and I knew her questioning wasn't meant to upset me but I wasn't in the mood for it.

"Of course, I will see you another time, when you aren't so worn out from presents, food and Sam's tales of wolves" She smiled wider now, her eyes twinkling as she watched me stand up. I didn't move, I just lingered by the arm of the sofa and looked back at Emily, her eyes dropped from mine instantly, I turned for my brother and his did the same. It was like they were guilty of something but I hadn't accused them. I knew something was going on and I hated sitting there in the awkward atmosphere waiting for it to come out, if they didn't want to tell me what it was they all knew or were so scared of then they didn't have to, it was their tale or secret to tell but they didn't need to treat me like I was simply imagining it either.

I said nothing more I just turned and left for the comfort of my room, this place was beautiful and peaceful there was no doubt about it, I liked it here, but it was starting to slip it's perfect image.

I walked to my room and lay on my bed; I didn't even bother with my light I just lay in darkness summing it all up. I had heard things in the two short weeks of being here, things I shouldn't hear but I have. Things about patrols and safety, borders and posts, people always told me not to linger too long or too far in the trees, Paul nearly had a heart attack earlier when he saw me there and then there was the girl's voice and the wolf. Why had Paul been there in the first place? Protecting little girls he had said, wolf territory. I felt like I was living in a real life version of Little Red Riding Hood, maybe one day I would walk in and find Emily eaten by a wolf. As I thought it her three long scars flashed across my mind, I had never been told what they were from but it looked animalistic. Maybe she had been so frightened earlier when I mentioned wolves because it was an animal that hurt her, maybe.

All this thinking was giving me a migraine. Today was giving me a migraine as well as an aching chest. I curled deeper into my bed, my body still lingering with the cold wind that had hit at me earlier. I wanted to forget today, forget the gaping hole in my chest, forget Paul's words, forget the questions, forget the wolf, forget Sam and Emily's reactions, forget it all. As I lay there in the dark heavy footsteps pattered outside my room, hovering there. I twisted my head further into the pillow and shut my eyes as the door opened and orange light leaked into the dark room, the footsteps thudded again, closer and closer until I felt a body peering over me but I kept my eyes shut. A hand, a rough warm hand came up and brushed the top of my head, smoothing my messy hair away from my forehead where it had fallen. Sam, I knew who it was with that simple touch.

"Don't hate me for bringing you here" His whisper was followed with a long breathy sigh as he smoothed my head again and backed away. I listened until his footsteps were distant and I cracked my eye open only enough so I could see the door where two bodies now stood, Sam's and Emily's, they looked at one another and he slowly bent down to kiss her scars before walking away. The gesture seeming somewhat full of sadness and heaviness of a secret, or maybe I was looking too much into it and it was simply a kiss. Emily gave a final look to my bed before shutting the door as she left, leaving me again to the darkness and my over thinking thoughts.

Don't hate me for bringing you here.

Why would he say that? Why would I hate him?

...

* * *

Sleep hadn't helped the migraine that had threatened to begin last night, in fact, sleep had made it angry and I had woken up this morning with a throbbing head and sensitive eyes. Emily had smiled genuinely at me as I walked downstairs, the house was seemingly normal again, Jared and Embry were both sat at the table when I came down and Kim was on her way. That had been a few hours ago, since then more guys had come and some had gone, but Sam hadn't been one of those he hadn't been around at all. His words still lay heavy with me; don't hate me for bringing you here, what did that even mean?

Each time I thought about it my head pounded and so I tried to focus on the conversations taking place around me, none of them which caught my attention for long enough to stop the questions.

"Are you ok?" Kim's body swooped in beside me as I stood gripping the side of the kitchen sink listening to Seth and Brady argue about which one the faster runner was. I looked up at my friend, her kind smile innocent and unaware of the questions swirling in my head. I had barely said a word to her all day. I nodded and smiled as best I could but her face fell into a frown.

"You can tell me if something's wrong? We could go for a walk or just sit outside for a while, the guys get a little boring to listen to" She smiled again and signalled with her hand to the door but I shook my head, I didn't want to walk, I didn't want a repeat of yesterday.

"I'm fine, honestly. I need to ring my friend, see how his Christmas was" I turned to leave but stopped realising I had been completely rude all day. "I forgot to say thank you for my present, it's beautiful. Sam told me what the word meant, I'm glad I have you as a friend Kim" I gave her a genuine smile and hers grew wider, her cheeks flushing as she nodded at me but she said nothing back and so I took the opportunity to leave.

Once outside I took my phone from my jean pockets and leant over the frost bitten wooden fencing of the porch, my eyes scanned the wintery yard as I listened to the ringing tone in my ear. It was freezing out here, I was in only a pair of skinny jeans and a t-shirt so naturally I would be cold but it was unnaturally cold today.

"Hello" The tired voice of my best friend travelled down the phone and the deflated feeling in my chest lifted instantly.

"Hey, it's me"

"Holy shit Savannah, I thought you were dead or something, hang on, KYLE PHONE" Kerry gasped down the phone before yelling for Kyle, I knew they would be together, it was a sort of tradition that the day after Christmas we would meet at one of our houses and eat shit tonnes of candy while watching whatever crappy DVD's we got for Christmas. "Are you ok? I haven't heard off you in what feels like ages" Kerry moaned a little and I smiled guiltily. I had been rubbish at keeping contact.

"I know, I'm sorry I meant to ring I just guess I got caught up. I'm fine though, how are you?" I could practically hear her rolling her eyes as I gave an excuse.

"I'm ok"

"ME TOO" Kyle's voice finally yelled out.

"You're on loudspeaker" Kerry added in and my chest tugged, part of me wanted to be there not on loud speaker. I missed them.

"Did you have a good Christmas?" Kyle asked before I could say a word, I made a grunting noise before I could stop myself. "That bad?"

"No, yes, I don't know. It was good I suppose, it just wasn't the same" I grumbled and the line went silent for a minute.

"I know, but it will get easier, did they give you presents and dinner? Do you have a tree?" Kerry started questioning and my smile came back, I'm sure they thought I was locked away in some tower. Before I moved here they questioned me about the place like it was some medieval town that hadn't progressed with time for centuries.

"Kerry, of course we had a tree and yes presents, that's not what I meant by it not being the same" I rolled my eyes and she laughed out from the other side of the phone.

"So tell us, what did you get?" Kyle interrupted before she made another stupid comment. "Did they get you nice things or shitty pyjama's and some socks?"

"Jake come here, look what I have"

The sweet cry of a giggling voice made my body sway in recognition, I knew that voice, I had heard that voice not even 24 hours ago. The phone dropped from my hand as I gripped at the frozen wood, my hand beginning to sting as I gripped tighter. Jake.

I looked up at the yard lying in front of me, from the trees walked a girl that I knew, Nessie and following her was Jacob, Jake. It couldn't be surely? It was a coincidence. But as he ruffled her hair her giggle cut through the crisp air causing my breath to trap in my throat, I knew that laugh because I had thought of it all night long last night; it was the laugh from the clearing. All I could do was stare as they made their way toward the house. The girl spotted me first, her face caught me by surprise; she was older. She had been just 8 when I saw her last, which was only a week ago but now as I looked at her she looked easily 10 if not 11. She was taller, her hair longer and her body leaner. She had grown not only in size but age.

"Hello Savannah" Her voice chimed out, the same melodic tone that I had heard yesterday. Jacob looked up from behind her, his expression somewhat guarded as he walked up the steps toward me.

"Hey" He spoke simply, I didn't reply I just watched as he leant down and picked my phone up from the floor, handing it to me before walking into the house after the little girl.

I stared after him for a minute before raising the phone to my ear again.

"Hello? Are you there? Hello?" Two different voices shouted from the ear piece.

"Yes, sorry" I breathed, still looking at the door.

"What the hell happened?"

"Are you ok?"

"I don't know, I need to go" I didn't wait for them to reply I simply shut the call off and slid the phone back into my pocket. I needed to see that clearing, it couldn't tell me anything but I need to see it.

I didn't even go back inside to get my coat I just ran down the steps and across the yard crossing into the trees where I had gone yesterday. I had to see that clearing. I kept walking further and further until I hit the Pocahontas tree, but no clearing.

"This is so stupid" I mumbled as I looked up at the tree with the face like groves in it. It was a strange tree, just like this was a strange place.

"Eeek" A little squeak let up behind me and I span around in time to see Kim stumbling through the trees toward me. "I hate wildlife, I hate trees, I really hate being outdoors" She squealed as she fell further toward me and stopped, brushing her jacket off and pulling stray leaves from her hair. She looked like she had just wrestled with a bush. "I am so not an outdoors person" She sighed as she finally looked up at me with a startled look on her face. "Why are you here?"

I frowned at her before looking around for some sign I was going mad. "You followed me" I pointed out and she stared at me like I was stupid.

"I know, I meant why did you come out here?" She spoke slower this time; I think we were misunderstanding one another.

"I wanted to see something, is there a reason why you followed me?" I didn't want to sound unkind, I didn't have a problem if she wanted to come but I did have a problem with being followed. It felt like everywhere went in this place I was followed.

"I saw you leave and you looked upset so I thought I would make sure you were ok, did you want me to leave you alone?" Her nerves came back to the surface now, it had taken two weeks to get her not to be so worried around me and shy so I wasn't about to bring it all back. I shook my head at her and turned back to the strange tree. "Freaky tree" She commented and I nodded, it sure was.

I glanced at her as we stood in silence, there was a small twig sticking out of her hood. I gave a little laugh and pulled it out, showing her before throwing it to the floor. "What happened to you?"

Her cheeks darkened with a blush and her lips spread into an innocent smile. "I'm just not a nature girl, me and trees do not get on. I can just about handle my back yard and event that's too green for me, give me a sofa and a bag of cheese puffs over this any day" She signalled to the trees around us and I laughed. "Jared always tries making me go for hikes and to the beach for night time walks, I never agree, you come out here a lot though" She turned to me and I nodded, I wouldn't say a lot but I liked being outdoors.

"It's peaceful, that is when I'm not being stalked by your mean friend" My voice sounded hurt as I said it and Kim frowned at me.

"My what?"

I glanced around the trees half expecting him to walk out but no one was out there. "Paul" Was all I offered and she rolled her eyes before giving a sheepish grin.

"He's not mean, he's just guarded"

What was with these people? They always defended him. "So I keep being told. He's just nasty" Again I sounded sad and Kim moved closer to me as we stood in front of the big tree.

"Did he upset you earlier?"

I shook my head, no, he upset me yesterday. Earlier I wasn't upset, I was confused and besides, Paul hadn't even been at the house. She didn't ask me any more on the subject and I didn't offer anything. I just stood watching the tree waiting for the wind to start and the face like grooves to move.

"What's up with the Renesmee girl?" I asked before thinking about it, as soon as the words left my mouth I realised I had sounded rude and intrusive. Kim's back straightened ready to defend her friend but her face stayed straight, a good poker face.

"I don't know what you mean" Her face stayed expressionless as she watched the tree, her eyes scanning it as if it were of great interest to her all of a sudden.

"It's just that well, she looked bigger today, older"

Kim shrugged as if it were nothing. "Kids grow I guess"

That wasn't any normal growth spurt, that was years of aging shortened to a week. "Where is she from? Is Jacob her brother?"

Kim smiled fondly but shook her head. "Not her brother exactly, just a close friend. She's from Forks; her grandfather is a doctor there, wealthy family. Why do you ask?" She finally looked at me and I saw the same look in her eyes that Emily had held since last night, a truth that wasn't being spoken.

"I think she was out here yesterday with Jake but I'm not sure I just thought I heard her" I shrugged it off trying to sound less crazy and she nodded at me.

"Probably, they come for walks all the time out here" She smiled again at me, a smile that although kind told me she wasn't willing to talk about it any further. I still had more questions though; I wanted her reaction to the wolf thing. I wanted to see if she was as scared as Sam and Emily had been, if she was just as dismissive.

"There was something else" I turned to fully face her and her blush faded as she looked back up at me, her eyebrows raised waiting. "I think there was a wolf"

"A wolf" She copied me, her voice going high pitched as she spoke and I nodded at her.

"A big wolf, I think I saw it in a clearing except I can't find the clearing" I didn't drop her eye contact no matter how much she squirmed under it. She wasn't as scared as Emily had been but she was nervous. Her tanned skin went pale and she fiddled with her fingers like a child being questioned by its parents.

"Wolves don't live this close to people, it could have been something else" She shrugged but her words made me frown.

"Paul said this was wolf territory" I mumbled to myself more than to her but she heard it and it sounded like she was choking.

"Paul said what?"

"Yesterday, he said this area was the territory of a wolf pack, he was telling me I was stupid being out here alone" She frowned more as I spoke and her mouth opened and closed as she tried searching for words.

"Well, Paul likes to scare people with old tales. We should go back" She turned to look through the trees and I nodded, Paul may have said it to scare me but I know what I saw and I know what I heard. I wasn't crazy.

Before I could say another word Kim began walking back to the house, her legs hurrying her along and I had to jog to keep up with her at first. For someone not athletic she had a fast pace to her. Neither one of us spoke as we made our way back and I didn't see the clearing again but something still bothered me, Sam's whispered words last night when he thought I was asleep. Why would I hate him? Why did he sound so scared when he said it? Was there something here that could hurt me?

"Kim" I called out as we reached the yard of the house, she stopped and turned to me, her kind smile back on her face with no trace of the nerves she had held with me not ten minutes before. "Is there any reason why I would hate Sam or this place? Is there something I should know about him?" I know the question didn't make sense but I didn't need it to, I just needed to know Sam wasn't someone who would hurt me. I had known him my whole life, I knew he wouldn't on purpose but I also didn't understand his words. She looked puzzled as she looked at me but she was quick to shake her head.

"Of course not"

"Should I be scared?" I stepped closer to her; she didn't take any time to think before she shook her head.

"No" Her eyes fell from mine and across the yard behind me, following something. I turned to look and my heart dropped, Paul. He looked at me but didn't meet my eyes, he simply kept walking until he disappeared behind the house door and I gave my attention back to Kim.

"He's a good guy; he's just been through a lot" She spoke before I could.

"Everyone goes through stuff, it's not an excuse to be cruel" I whispered as if worried he would hear me from behind the thick wooden door.

"No, it's not" She looked down at her feet before moving to walk away; she stopped only a few paces from me. "Savannah, don't write Paul off as the asshole so quickly, there's more to him than that"

I felt like I had been hit in the chest with a tree trunk, it was unbelievable how quick the people here were to jump to his defence when all I saw was an arrogant dick of a man who didn't seem to care for anyone other than himself.

"He wrote me off before he even knew my name" My voice was bitter and full of a harshness I hadn't heard leave my mouth before. Kim took me in for a moment before nodding her head as if in agreement and turning back to the house.

I didn't want to go in, I didn't want to sit around with him glaring at me or Sam watching me like I was about to unload his darkest secrets so I sat on the bench outside the house and curled up as best I could. I was freezing in just my t-shirt but I didn't want to go in. I just sat there and stared at the snow clouds floating above me. Moving here was supposed to be easier for me but so far I think I had been harder. The door behind me opened and footsteps crunched their way down the frosty steps toward where I saw curled up beneath the porch. I didn't look up but a shadow cast itself over my shivering body.

A hand held something out in front of my face, my thick fleece lined coat. I looked up at the person and saw the one I didn't want to see, Paul. He dropped the coat on the bench beside me and without a word walked out into the yard and down the dirt track leading to the main road. He didn't look back, he just left. When I could no longer see him I looked down at the coat, why would he give me that? If he didn't care about me why would he bring me a coat?

* * *

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	15. Chapter 15

Where have all your reviews gone? :0 Anyway, ENJOY!

* * *

The house was silent, it was silent for the first time in five days and I soaked it in as I walked downstairs to the living area that was how full of boxes of Christmas decorations. Emily had been taking the Christmas decorations down this morning but she had left at some point, she hadn't said why she had just called goodbye and left. Not that I was complaining, the last time I had had any peace had been when I lay freezing cold on the bench outdoors and that peace had been ruined by confused questioning inside my head.

I looked around the small house double checking that no one was here and nobody was. My eyes fell onto the bookcase I had been admiring for the past few days, it was full of books old and new but there was one that had caught my eye, one that was different to the others. I had paid closer attention since my walk in the woods, the images and words floating in my head had caused me to become obsessed I suppose, I had hung on each word spoken by the never ending trail of guys and the way they worded things. Patrol, pack,leech. None of it made any sense but they spoke as if it did, each time something was mentioned Emily would stare at me as if expecting me to say something or do something but I never did, I just listened and tried desperately to come up with a logical explanation. I had done so such thing, the only explanation I had thought of came straight out of a fantasy novel, the angry wolves Paul had talked about held control over this small tribe, hence the nerves and terror Emily and Sam had held when they heard that I saw one. Obviously, that explanation was wrong because supernatural things like that just didn't exist but it was all I had.

All I knew was that the wolves had been mentioned during Billy's stories and those stories were kept in one book and Sam happened to have one of those books, a very old one which had grabbed my attention as I sat and pretended not to listen to Sam organising a meeting with a pack, a pack of what I hadn't a clue but that book had caught my attention for a reason, or so I thought. And so now that I was alone for the first time in five days I was going to read that book and find out what the hell the people here are so afraid of.

I crept across the creaking floorboards to the living room, behind the sofa lay a huge wooden bookcase and on the middle row, in the middle position lay the book I wanted. My hand was shaking as I reached for it but why I felt so nervous and shaky I had no idea, it was just a book. It was a thick book, the leather cover held swirled writing on the front that looked like a foreign word, probably Quileute. It was a strange book, just like this was a strange place but I held it close to me and sat down on the cold sofa, my fingers trailing the writing etched into the front cover. If this thing didn't give me answers I didn't know what would.

The house lay still, no wind howled from outside, no beeping came from the oven timer, no laughter came from loud men, there was nothing. I liked nothing, it was peaceful and calm, a feeling I missed about living with just myself and my mom. I took me big breath before turning the front page and scanning the first page, it looked like an old fairytale book, the pages were crumbled from years of being read and it held a smell of dust and old paper. I kept turning, my eyes quickly scanning the words and glancing at the aged drawings, I kept turning and turning until I found the picture that halted me, a wolf.

**Taha Aki**

I didn't know what that was but the story was about it and so I steadied myself ready to read, the picture to the right was a huge wolf with smaller ones behind it, the alpha dog followed by his pack I suppose. Pack, one of the words Sam uses. Different context though, Sam didn't have wolves. I found the first sentence and read quickly, taking in as much as I could as I went although I distantly remembered a lot of it from Billy's story. I hadn't listened properly but as I read the words now it came back in a far recognition. It was a soothing story, a fairy tale that I had never heard before, a story of protectors and third wives which in my head meant knights and their princesses. Wolves and their ladies. This was a fairy tale book and nothing more; I had been drawn to a book of tales. I was an idiot. Old tales of tribes past, this stuff wasn't true, it couldn't be it was far too magical and strange. I led back on the soft sofa as I continued to read through the old stories of cold ones and battles, my eyes drooping as I went. I wouldn't fall asleep.

...

_I was cold, colder than I had ever been before. Freezing flames rose up from my feet, my bare feet. I looked down at the ground and saw my feet hitting the mud and leaf covered floor, the frost bitten floor. It was so cold out. I wasn't sure how I got out here; I was amongst the trees, tall towering trees that let no light in. I could see my breath in front of me disappearing into the darkening air around me as I took sharp stinging breaths. This felt off, it was too dark, too quiet. Not even the birds were singing as I walked further and further into the trees. I shivered as a gust of deadly silent wind hit my body and my arms rose to cradle myself; there was no fabric on my arms, no fabric on my legs. I looked over myself, I was in a white dress that hung freely to my knees, it was light material holding no warmth to it. I had never owned a dress like this before, it was beautiful._

_"You are beautiful" The low voice made me stop, my shivering body sprung up with goose bumps and a warmth washed through me as rough hands touched softly on my shoulders. "Come with me" The body behind me moved and I saw his face, his beautiful intimidating face._

_"But you don't like me" I whispered back to him, my breath escaping my mouth in a sharp fog. His beautiful face only smiled back at me, a kind smile, a smile I wanted to see for real but he would never give to me._

_"You should see this" His big hand held itself out for me, it was a much duller shade of tan I remembered him being, he almost seemed ghost like as he waited for me to take it. "You can trust me, I won't hurt you" His hand jerked for me again and mine reached back, I wanted to feel him but as my small hand linked into his he vanished. A fragment of my imagination. I was going crazy._

_I stood still simply looking for Paul as I stood alone in the dark trees, nothing was out there. No one was out there, I was alone._

_"Savannah, come this way" The voice was back, singing to me and I span around searching for his face. "I can't wait for you to see" He called out again and again I failed to find him._

_"See what?" I asked back only to be met with the giggle of the girl, the girl I had heard the other day. Renesmee. I span around until I saw her, her soft pretty face smiling at me from beside a huge tree._

_"What you have been searching for" She stared simply at me, her little hand reaching out for me to take but I didn't. If she vanished like Paul I would be all alone._

_"Where am I?" I asked as I followed her through the trees, deeper into the thick greenery that turned blacker with each step I took._

_"Where you left yourself of course" The little girl turned back to me, her face lifting in a bright smile that I didn't understand. I was where I left myself? I don't remember leaving myself in a nightmare, this place was a nightmare. As we walked in silence a branch snapped behind me, I span around to look but nothing was there, nothing._

_"What was that?" I squeaked out and turned to face the girl but she was gone. "Nessie?" I called out in a whisper, no reply. "Nessie?" I tried again and moved forward but there was no reply._

_"Have you found it yet?" A new voice made me jump and Kim walked out from behind a tree in front of me, her skin paler than it should be, her hair in long curls hanging down her back while she was dressed in a floor length plain white gown. This was one hell of a nightmare._

_"F-found what?" I played along and walked toward her, her face uplifted in a smile and she looked behind her._

_"You weren't looking hard enough, it's always been here"_

_"I don't understand" I followed her further into the trees where the darkening night became lighter, as if I was walking out into the real air._

_"It waits for you through those trees, the place you've been looking for" She stopped and leant against a tree, her pale hand lifting to point at a gap through the trees that lay directly ahead of me. What was through there? I wanted to ask but when I looked for her she was gone. I didn't bother calling her name I knew she was gone, instead I walked for the gap, my cold feet walking slowly over the uneven ground._

_I kept walking until I saw it, the clearing, it lay beyond the trees with a dull light gleaming down upon it giving it a soft glow against the winter darkness that ate at the trees surrounding me. I stood still as I reached the middle of the clearing, my eyes scanned the trees ahead of me but nothing was there._

_"Savannah" Sam, I could hear Sam. I looked for him but he wasn't here, his voice was carried in the wind that hit my hair softly._

_"What's happening?" I asked anyone who was listening, this made no sense._

_"Look harder, the truth is right in front of you" Kim, I could hear Kim._

_"Tales of wolves and cold ones" Allison, the wind carried her voice too._

_"You're in wolf territory" Paul. I turned desperate to find him but he wasn't here._

_"This is crazy" I whispered as I stopped twisting and turning and the hot hands came down on my bare shoulders once again, hot breath tickled my ear as the body enclosed on my back. Paul, the touch told me that._

_"Are you scared?" He whispered and my eyes shut at the soothing feel of him near me._

_"Should I be?" I whispered back, my eyes staying shut as I listened to the clearing._

_"That depends"_

_"On what?" I turned my head upwards and toward him, his breath getting hotter against my neck as we stood alone in the dark clearing._

_"Are you afraid of wolves?"_

_His soft voice turned louder as he spoke, an angry tone to his voice and I span around to look at him except it wasn't him, it was a wolf. A huge silver wolf with blood red angry eyes and teeth bore violently at me. A wolf. Paul had turned into a wolf. I stumbled back and as I did the wolf in front of me growled a low furious growl and lunged for me, no not for me, for my neck._

...

I jerked upright, my body jumping awake. It was dark, still so dark but I didn't feel any pain or hot blood dripping down my body, the wolf came for me. I should be hurt, maybe I was dead. My eyes scanned the ceiling, not the sky, the ceiling. I was indoors. Where indoors? I turned my head to see and I was met with familiar surroundings, Sam's house. My body ached, not painfully but tiredly. What was that? Was that real or just a horrible nightmare?

My eyes rolled over the room and stopped as they locked on a person, Sam. He was sat in the chair opposite the sofa just staring at me through the dim darkness of the house, it was pitch black outside and the only light in here was coming from a small lamp in the corner, it lit up his face and I saw the serious look he held as he stared down at me. I was on the sofa, I had fallen asleep. It was a nightmare; it had to be a nightmare.

"Sam" I croaked as I sat upright, the book I had been reading was no longer on my chest and as I looked at my brother I noticed it laying in his lap. Crap. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have gone through your things" I whispered as I sat myself back against the warm sofa, my body was hot and sweaty but the house was cold. Sam didn't say anything back to me he just watched, it was almost creepy the way he was sat there. How long had he watched me sleep? Why was he here? I couldn't tell if he was angry or upset, he was just staring.

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat and he leant forward placing the thick book on the small coffee table that lay between us before resting himself on his knees.

"We need to talk" He finally spoke and my heart plummeted, I hated those words. Those were the words my mom said to me the day she told me the truth about my father, the day she told me my grandparents were dead, the day she told me she had lost her job, it was the words the police officer spoke before she told me my mom was dead and now he was saying it, it never led to anything good.

"I'm tired" I whispered pathetically in an attempt to avoid whatever was going to be said but he shook his head.

"No, we need to talk now. You've been noticing things and it's not fair to lie to you anymore, you're not a child and this is your home. You need to feel safe here and this is the only way for you to do that" He stopped and looked up at me, he looked upset, like he was about to cry. "Just please, don't hate me for it"

"Why would I hate you?" I struggled to talk properly as he spoke the words he had whispered to me as I pretended to sleep. He had done something; maybe he was a crazy killer or something equally as dangerous. But then it was Sam, I knew Sam and he wasn't a killer or a psycho he was just Sam.

"This book, you read it?" He looked at the book on the table and I nodded slowly, I had before I fell asleep, before that horrible dream had eaten at me. "You read about our histories, our family history and our tribe"

"Our descendants" I offered and he nodded. "They are stories of wolves and cold ones, they are like fairytales" I mumbled but he shook his head this time.

"Fairytales are myths, these aren't some stories written for children Sav, these are our histories" He looked back up at me, holding my eye contact as he spoke through a shaky voice. "What did you see?"

My body froze at his words; did he know what I had dreamt? How could he know I saw things? What was he talking about?

"When you were out there what did you see?"

I frowned again; did he mean the dream or the other day? Not that it made a difference I saw the same thing both times. "Wolf" I stated simply and he nodded.

"I believe you Savannah, this isn't a joke. I just want to hear what you saw that day when you went for a walk" He spoke slower and lowered his eyes to his lap waiting for me to speak.

It took me a few minutes to gather myself, my fingers gripped at one another and I found myself struggling to find something to say but then the memories came into focus and I spoke what I saw. "I heard voices, a little girl. I followed it but I couldn't see her, she was talking to someone called Jake but I didn't see any one, not anyone but the wolf. You looked scared when I said it, so did Emily but none of you said anything, I thought maybe I was the crazy one but then Nessie came here, it was her voice but I didn't see her, or Jake. What was it?" I moved forward on the sofa so I was sat on the edge, I watched as my brother's eyes shut slowly and reopened, his face draining of the colour he did have.

"You did see Jake"

I cocked my head to the side trying to remember that day; I hadn't seen anyone but the wolf. He leant forward again and nudged the book to the edge of the coffee table in front of me. "You did see Jake" He repeated himself but this time his voice was firmer and I found my shaking hand reaching for the book, turning the pages until I found the wolf picture and the words talking through our descendants, Taha Aki.

"That's a kid's story" I whispered to myself more than anyone but Sam replied like he had heard me clearly.

"No" I looked at my brother, he wasn't joking with me. His expression was serious and true, why was he doing this? "It's not a storybook it's the history of our tribe, our pack. Those words are the truth; our tribe are descendants of shape shifters, wolves. You saw Jake in that clearing, he was the wolf. He was with Nessie, you didn't see her because she was catching snowflakes but you saw Jake, you looked right at him. We turn into wolves to protect the tribe"

"What are you doing?" I cut across him, my voice sharp with disbelief and anger at what he was saying. He was treating me like a fool, if he thought he could mess with me like this for entertainment he couldn't.

"You've been noticing things, it's only fair to tell you before you stumble across something you shouldn't and you get upset. You live here now, this is your home and you need to understand the family you come from. Our father carried the gene of shape shifters, when those carrying that gene sense danger we phase and we create a pack who protect the tribe"

"Shut up" I spat as I could no longer handle his words, lies. That wasn't possible.

"Savannah, this is the truth you wanted. You've been asking about the wolves, about our secrets and I'm trying to tell you. I'm not lying"

"Stop it" I tried again to shut him up, I didn't want to hear this.

"You've been looking for the truth, you've been listening to us, and you've been trying to find that clearing, you've been reading these legends, please believe me. I wouldn't lie to you"

"I said STOP IT" I flew up from my seat sending the book clattering to the floor at my feet, I couldn't handle this. I needed to get out, I looked to the door which was ajar only slightly, I had a clear pathway. I could get out; I could go and forget all of this. I started moving but he followed me, I moved faster as I reached the door and I ran out into the freezing cold night, it was spitting with rain but I didn't care.

"Savannah" A new voice yelled out for me and I stopped as I entered the muddy yard, Jacob was walking toward me with his arms outstretched as if surrendering. "Savannah, slow down and listen for a minute"

"I don't need to listen to anything, this is bullshit and I just need to go for a walk" I squeaked as I went to move around him but he followed me. Sam was stood on the porch just watching us and I realised I had got myself trapped by the two of them. I suddenly felt very unsafe in this place, the place that I was supposed to call home now felt like an edge of a cliff.

"Please, we aren't going to hurt you, the pack won't hurt you" He tried to move closer to me but I backed off.

"Pack?" I questioned and his eyes slipped to my brother stood behind me.

"Wolves, pack of wolves"

"This isn't funny Jacob, stop it" I pleaded but he shook his head.

"I'm not doing this to be cruel, you wanted the truth and this is it. I hadn't realised you saw me, I didn't mean to scare you. I take Nessie out when it snows and I didn't think you would be out there"

"You are all crazy, this is crazy" I mumbled and Jacob gave a little laugh causing me to jerk, he couldn't laugh at this.

"Sorry, would you let me show you something?" He moved slightly closer and I didn't move, I couldn't if I wanted to I was frozen. I simply nodded and watched as he turned his head to the trees he had just walked from and gave a whistle, as if calling for a dog.

I looked for Sam and saw him stood on the porch, watching with intensity and his body on edge, as if ready to run down here if needed but I didn't know why he would be like that.

"Savannah, don't freak out" Jacob spoke again and I turned back to him, only to let out a small scream as I saw what was approaching him from the trees, a wolf. A freaking wolf. A little wolf with light fur and oversized feet but still, it was a wolf. "Savannah calm down, you're safe, you're fine" Jacob walked for me and I stumbled away again. How was I safe? It was a wolf, an angry wolf who could eat me.

"Wake up, wake up" I whimpered to myself over and over as the wolf continued to walk toward Jacob, it's head bowed as if scared of me but it had no reason to be, it would eat me not me eat it.

"You aren't sleeping, this is real" Sam called out this time and I noticed his voice was closer than expected. "It's Seth, Seth Clearwater, you know him" Sam spoke again and my eyes found the wolf, its eyes lifted and I saw the kindness in them that the boy I knew had. But it was impossible, it couldn't be Seth. "He won't hurt you, we won't hurt you"

I looked back at Sam and I just lost it, this was insane. "What are you doing Sam? Why did you bring me here if you're going to screw with me? How can you say I'm safe here when you're all crazy and oh my god I need to leave" I turned looking desperately for an escape root but Sam's hand came down on my arm stopping me.

"Savannah please, you know me, I'm your brother. I wouldn't ever hurt you, you have to believe me. I would have done anything to keep you from this, I would have loved to let you go on not knowing but you asked for the truth, you looked for the truth and the only way to protect you is for you to know. Please, I'm not doing this to hurt you I'm only telling you to protect you, you have to believe me" He was pleading desperately, his grip on my arm wasn't tight and so I ripped myself from his grip. This was insane, he wasn't my brother, my brother was normal this guy was insane. This was insane.

"No, this is insane, I want to go home" I whimpered again before turning and sprinting for the dirt track, no one stopped me, the wolf even flinched from me as I sprinted past it. I had to get out of here.

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